Guy I'm seeing is friends with my enemy ..aibu to be mad?

[bedintheclouds]

I have been really great friends with a woman for over 10 years.
Met the guy I'm seeing through her.
Anyway her jealousy took over and she turned nasty on me and we have fallen out.
She is still friends with the guy I'm seeing and she's tagging him (and the other group of friends ) about going away for a weekend.
Obviously I'm not invited.
He is replying on fb all nicey nice
He is zero loyalty to me does he..would you be mad?

If i were you OP I would pull her pigtails and tell the teachers that the big girls made me do it before they ran away.

I feel like some posters know a back story that maybe I don't...

But anyhow, if a friend of mine started criticising and lieing about my dp I'd most likely be dropping her. Shed be entitled to her opinion. I wouldn't share it and we'd have to go out separate ways.

Did you post about this before? There was a thread here recently that was very similar.

The basics are he can be friends with whomever he wants but in a relationship you are meant to be a team so while he can and should be friends with her if he wants that doesn't mean he should dismiss any future bad behaviour towards you.
What's past is past but if she starts up again he needs to support you.

You really need to sort this out with her, try to be civil and see if you can come to some resolution. Asking him to choose you over friends he has know longer, will not only alienate all his other friends , but also rightly give him worries about your mental state.

I recognise your situation from previous threads OP but can't remember how long you've been seeing this guy?

I don't think it's a long established thing (think you said it isn't even a relationship yet - sorry if I'm wrong) so don't you think this is all WAY too complicated?!

Sack it off - you've found out she's not a loyal friend and you've found out he isn't prioritising or even really acknowledging your feelings. Count your blessings you found this out sooner rather than later.

I'm worried you're continuing to see him because you don't want her to "win" as such. He doesn't sound like that much of a prize tbh, and she doesn't sound like someone you'll continue to be friends with either way - so what's the down side of ending it and moving on from them both?

@ThatCurlyGirl I really like him.
We get on so well and have a lot in common.
If it hadn't of been for my friend causing all the drama it would have been fine.

But she has and so it isn't.

How long have you been seeing this guy?

It sounds like everyone involved is thriving on the drama and seeing it as a game tbh.

Just a couple of months.
I just want us all to get on tbh.

How old are you?

But you aren't going to get on! That's the point.

It's no good dealing with real, adult life on what you wish was true but is false.

It shouldn't be this hard, especially this early.

You aren't going to get on, so what's the plan? The actual plan, not just what you wish was true?

I want to make peace with her for a quiet life but she's just being vile
She doesn't want you to have a peaceful life though!

Your 10 year friendship history means fuck all to her that's why she's behaving like this.
She's finally shown you a side of her that you haven't seen in 10 years.

She's not your friend. She's not going to 'get on' with you....and she's not going to pay back the £300 (if you're the same poster who posted that thread)

Yeah I'm the same poster.
It's just a awful situation to be in.
I'm not sure it would work out with this guy but it would be nice to be able to find out without all this crap.

@bedintheclouds

With all due respect in the grand scheme of things it really isn't that awful a situation to be in! Annoying and frustrating, sure but try to keep perspective. You'll have obstacles a million times this one during the course of your love life. Move on and find something easy and someone kind that brings out the best in you!

so just block her from your phones and social media.
then you won't have to deal with the crap.

I bet he's loving two women fighting over him.