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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To report my neighbours?

4 replies

stephfriend · 19/06/2019 10:36

Hi Mumsnetters,

Long time lurker, first time poster, looking for a second opinion.

Our neighbours opposite have always been a colourful bunch but I don’t think I can ignore my instincts any more.

Mum is in (I think) late 50’s / early 60’s, archetypal nosy neighbour, spends all day curtain twitching and likes to rope people in for a gossip. Not the brightest spark but pleasant enough. Dad is in an out of jail regularly, the smell of weed from theirs infiltrates our house quite often, and the police are round at least once a week looking for 2 errant sons who live elsewhere. They are generally fairly well behaved but I don’t think they’re the sort of family I’d want to cross.

They have a son who I think is around 18 or 19. He has Downs Syndrome and attends a special school a few days per week. He’s generally chatty and friendly, helps people taking bins out, washing cars etc.

Over the past few months I’ve noticed he’s left outside a lot on his own, in a high viz vest, with a Walkman. He’s in and out of the road (luckily we’re on a quite cul de sac), dragging bins about and shouting profanities, often until quite late at night. He’s been outside in the rain a few times. He’s said “I’m mental, I’m mental” to my OH before which I think it learned behaviour. Mum happily sits indoors all night watching telly while he’s wandering around. She has told me before that he’s on medication due to his aggression.

What I think is the final straw for me is that he was outside until late the other evening with no shirt on, hacking at a bag of leaves with massive garden shears, unsupervised. He went indoors at about midnight.

I know I have to report this, and I will. My question is – is it possible to report to social services because he’s classed as an adult, and also is it possible to report anonymously? I have a feeling my life would become unbearable if they clocked it was me.

If anyone has any similar experiences I would be interested to hear what you did.

Cheers all.

OP posts:
Walkamileinmyshoesbeforeujudge · 19/06/2019 10:39

Your local council will have a vulnerable adult service. Ring the main number and it's one of the options..

Stressedout10 · 19/06/2019 10:54

Yes your council will have an adult ss department and you can report your concerns anonymously though they will record the phone number you call from

motheroffourcats · 19/06/2019 11:37

Adults with special needs are always regarded as vulnerable. Social Services will want to know. Do the right thing. You seem to know he needs more care and support. You are a kind person.

Pollywollydolly · 19/06/2019 13:18

Just a word of warning here, I fully agree that you should report your concerns, however, your neighbours will try to guess who has reported them. They may guess wrong but they may guess right. when I worked in social housing we never disclosed who had reported incidents to us, but the tenants very often worked it out.

If they confront you, you'll need to bluff it out, They won't be sure it was you.

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