Meeting with school tomorrow. R.E son not achieving / possible dypraxia . Also they're changing his gcse because they said he won't get good marks for the school.without discussions

[HereForAdvice2019]

Try to keep brief. But cover everything.
Since infants my son (now 13) has always struggled. From. Simple things like holding a pen, sports, concentrating, clumsy.
Each time I mentioned it it was dismissed and told he needs to ' buck up his ideas' etc
we put lots of things in place, but still struggled.
started seniors and he just seemed to lose all concentration and cares. said everything was hard. no one listens or helps etc.. he then started being disruptive. After many meetings etc. we moved his school as we felt this was best. and yes he has improved. (slightly) . difference with this school is theu deal with most issues and rarely call me, unlike the previous school when I was getting 10 plus calls a week.. for silly things as well as more important, 1 silly example 'ds dropped his entire pencil case over the floor which made people laugh'

so he confidently chose with our guidance some gcses. he's not the most acedemic but was looking forward to them.
He came home Friday and said they're not. letting me do geography and. I've got to do DofE. I thought he meant as well as geography at first. DP called the school and they said. Well we know ds won't do well at geography which reflects on the school so we've put him to do DofE.

now I don't know if I'm BU as they have kind of a point but they should of discussed it surely?
also he recently gave up scouting and I got rid of everything camping wise. I now have to pay out again through something that wasn't my decision, nor have any say in it.

regarding possible dypraxia. my aunt teaches in a sen school and i hadn't seen her since ds was 8. i saw her at my nans the other day and explained his difficulties and she said almost without a doubt ' by what you've told me I am. almost certain ds has dypraxia' but it's hard due to funding for schools to diagnose. gave me a website to look at. I'm shocked as 90% of it he ' ticks the boxes'

now my issue is where do I go from here.

Sorry about the typos, new phone and fat fingers.

My DD has diagnosed with dyspraxia in y11.

It massively depends what 'flavour' of dyspraxia he has.

For my DD as well as clumsiness (which doesn't impact schooling except tech subjects), she struggled to think with a pen in her hand (typing helped this), couldn't answer open ended questions (English Lang & history massively impacted), took longer over revision, & didn't pick up always on guidance being given by the teachers. She ended up dropping History and we had a massive panic to pass Eng Lang.

What they are suggesting, it seems, is your DS doing one less GCSE. This could be a real benefit as it reduces homework, revision and exams. DofE isn't just camping, there is the skill, physical and activity too all of which could be very beneficial.

I would go with an open mind. Listen to their assessment and how much work a full load GCSE timetable is. Unless he is very keen on Geography, in which case fight to keep it but think about flexibility elsewhere.

What other options has he picked?

They shouldn't make him drop it because it doesn't reflect well on them, but think whether if he does struggle with it, it is a good use of his time.

Not sure where to go from here, but the school really should have spoken to you about this earlier. Not just sending him home and you hearing from him.

It should have been properly explained to you.

Are they removing him from other doing other GCSE subjects apart from Geography?

Thank you. I'm glad you got a diagnosis for your dd. My son sounds very similar.

I will be open minded for sure I was annoyed they didn't discuss it.

Other gcse was the normal English maths science and b tec p.e. Can't remember if was another though?
The school suggested getting a work type placement once a week or fortnight to keep focused. Normally from. Yr 10 but would possibly do from Yr 9
my partners works have said he can go there as oftwn goes after school and weekends etc to help out.

I just don't know what I need to ask or mention. my heads all over the place doesn't help I've had gastro bug the weekend and pregnant

He said just geography as far aa he was aware.

Could you afford a private assessment? It will be quicker than waiting

Arrange an urgent meeting with the SENCO and go prepared with what you would like to happen and a list of historical problems and see what they say.

Remember school have a duty to act and provide reasonable adjustments, this is inshrined in Law.

Please reassure him he’s very bright and intelligent he just learns in a different way.

You need to go in aware of what GCSEs he has picked so far.
As standard it will probably be:
Maths
English Lang & English Lit
Combined Science (2 GCSEs)
then probably 4 others.

Find out what grade they expect him to get. Are you expecting him currently to pass everything? What is your priority - passes in 5 inc Eng & Maths, or a well rounded curriculum? If they are suggesting work placement it sounds like maybe they aren't expecting him to do well at all.

How practical is BTEC PE? Sounds a nightmare for someone with dyspraxia. Though the BTEC element is good as that would be coursework mainly.

What are his interests/skills? What future jobs are you thinking (yes In know it is early days)? (We have found that DD's dyspraxia seems to impact really quite a lot of things (including common sense)). Take the long view.

but it's hard due to funding for schools to diagnose.

Schools don’t diagnose. What they can do is help get referrals to the right route locally for a diagnosis - probably a developmental paediatrician and then take it from there. Talk to the senco and ask.

I'll ask his gcse when he gets home.
He chose b tech as in that ' column in his list ', it was b tech pe. Gcse pe or a hairdressing qualification. I remember that vividly.
He likes pe but is very clumsy
Loves football and being in goal. But no exaggeration he has more accidents and bruises than anyone I've ever known. His legs are covered top to bottom.

Regarding him passing which ones. In all honesty.. Without sounding like a horrible mum. I'd be doubtful if he'll pass any of he does it will be a scrape.
He wants to do. Mechanics which is what he'll do with dp and has been trying to learn. They've even said he can have an apprenticeship when he leaves school but he's needing grades to get to college. It's just so scary.

So to do the apprenticeship what will he need?

I would really throw everything at getting Maths & English plus whatever else he is most likely to succeed in.

imo He is way better off doing fewer and passing them than more and failing.
My DD2 (y9) has picked Geography. There is a lot of content (including some mathsy stuff). There is also a hell of a lot of content in the combined science.
A reduced revision & exam load come summer of y11 will give him best chances of scraping up to passes.
(My DD2 will have 20 exams over 4 weeks, so that averages 1 a day. I wish she had fewer. She has some SpLD too and I am open to the possibility she may benefit from dropping something at some point.)

I would try to discuss doing less subjects and giving him as much support as possible to pass those then especially as he is focused on what he wants to do. Can he get a mechanics related work placement?

But no exaggeration he has more accidents and bruises than anyone I've ever known.
You haven't met my DD1.

Yes he volunteers at dps works which is a garage. Tues and Thurs after school and weekends when dp is working. ( he's not confident enough to go without dp) they've said if the school allow there as a placement he can too

As regards to what grades he'll need for college and mechanics I honestly don't know. We hadn't looked that far. When he chose the gcses. Aside from. The core ones. He chose ones he enjoyed. As with ds if he don't enjoy he will have no focus whatsoever and just fail.

What has your gp said ? I’m assuming you’re taken him at some point .

DS was diagnosed with DCD (Development Co Ordination Disorder) Dyspraxia when he was 10. We went to the GP for an unrelated issue and she was chatting to him about school and he mentioned he was sad as he got in trouble all of the time for messy handwriting, too slow at getting dressed after PE lessons and kept loosing things.

The GP said she suspected dyspraxia and asked him a few other questions such as could he ride a bike (No) Tie his laces (No). She was a brilliant GP and said she wanted to refer him immediately so he had support in place for secondary school. The diagnosis route for DS was GP (who also done a basic neurological test) / school nurse observations filled in on a form / occupational therapist assessment / community paediatrician (who made formal diagnosis).

Having the diagnosis has made a massive difference academically to DS who is now 17 as it really allowed him to reach his full potential. He was given access to a laptop for extended writing in class and for exams, and was also given extra time and a separate room for his exams. His head of English at secondary was also the SENCO and taught him specific ways on how to prepare for essay writing at GCSE. He was given colour co-ordinated timetables with his text books for each subject in the relevant colour to help his organisation. Every year we would have a meeting and discuss DS's Individual Education Plan, it was at these meetings that suggestions and solutions were discussed for every one of his subjects if he found them challenging eg he was allowed to drop DT in year 8 onward as he didn't feel safe using the machines because of his weak grip. He was also allowed to use his phone to screen shot teachers board work in lessons.

Personally for DS it also helped with his confidence as he finally understood why he kept dropping things and had trouble using cutlery and why he struggled doing things like sports.

Now he is doing his A levels and he still has some support with exams but lost his extra time due to getting such strong GCSE grades and that it would be seen as him having too much of an advantage.

We used to joke that they probably had a picture of DD1 up in the tech staff room with a large red border and a warning sign. If there was a way to hurt yourself in a tech lesson, DD1 would find it!

Did a quick look. e.g.

www.findapprenticeship.service.gov.uk/apprenticeship/-426362

Desired qualifications
GCSE';s passes are preferred but not essential as Functional Skills in maths and English will be completed.
Some experience with a level 2 in place already would be preferable.

So looks like he can be taken on without the passes.

Have you contacted the Dyspraxia Foundation? Ds2 and I are both dyspraxic...

My son has ASD and a learning difficulty. He is doing 5 GCSEs and 2Btecs. We also dropped geography - it's a very demanding course. He is doing BTEc sport - he loves sports, he is enthusiastic but not very good. It doesn't matter- the actual sport playing is only a couple more lessons a week than ordinary PE, the rest is theory. Apart from Maths and Sport he is expected to achieve 3s and 4s. But it remains to be seen how the pressure of the actual exams will effect this.
I think you need to unpick things a bit and think about what he needs.
Yes the school have handled it poorly and I would also complain.
However, if you are not confident that he is going to do well then dropping the Geography is actually very helpful.
I always tell my son to look at what he needs for the next step. At his school no one does more than 8 GSCEs, because as the Head says, not even Oxbridge want 10. If you know he wants to go to a college or get an apprenticeship, find out what the entry requirements are.
My son has a choice of about 30 courses at college which require 2 to 4 GCSEs. I' m not going to put him or me under unnecessary pressure for qualifications he doesn't need.
If you think he has a specific condition such then you need to push for referrals and assessments. They can take a long time though so try and identify things that can help him. A writing slope made a huge difference to my son, if he doesn't want to stand out he can use a lever arch file. There are loads of gadgets available to help open grips etc.

I expect my son to work hard, do his homework etc but he understands the GSCEs aren't the be all and end all. Took us a long time to get there though.

Thank you. Hadn't seen gp. Simply because the previous 2 schools just put everything down to him being lazy, silly and clumsy etc made me think I was being silly. But to be honest a few yrs ago I'd never heard of dypraxia silly I know.
Collected him from school to drop to garage and he's doing business. Drama and the pe as well as the core gcses.

Have noted everything to go in to school hopefully knowledgeable tomorrow and ask to speak to SENCO. And make an appointment with GP

Thanks for the advise

There’s a good chance the school will provide all the camping stuff for the D of E camping element.

OP I have sent you a private message... 💙