To wish my parents were supportive

[Stripyseagulls]

I have seen a few posts the last few days on social media about supportive parents- especially around Father’s Day. It makes me sad as my parents aren’t supportive and never have been. They are divorced, both kind of ran off in different directions with their new partners leaving me & my sister kind of standing on our own (metaphorically). I wonder what my life would have been like if I felt like I had parents there who ‘had my back’ so to speak as I have never felt that. Neither have ever said they love me or are proud of me and sometimes I think that has defined my life in some ways.
As it goes- I have lovely kids who I tell every day I love them & that I am always there & have their backs. I feel like I have never had that security emotionally.
Aibu- has anyone else experienced this feeling? I think I have felt lost for quite a lot of my life in some ways as a result - and possibly made bad decisions as a result.

I know I can’t change it - I just feel like it’s taken me until my 40s & having my own kids to process it and I envy people that have that emotional security.

Hi Stripyseagulls I am also an ACOD (Adult child of divorce) and if you look online there is some stuff about others feeling the same way.
Also a common feeling (as well as the lack of support) is a feeling of at times, the parents turning to their child as an emotional support or crutch. maybe you have less of that as your parents met someone else. With mine, they didn't. So, yes I do understand what you mean.
It's not easy and that getting rug pulled from under you doesn't fade.

I too try and be like you with my DC, but also try not to overdo it as wonder if i might be over -compensating. I am getting to the early teens, when my own parents split in a very dramatic way (which involved us) and feeling nervous and trying to keep everything as stable as possible at home during there important exam years.