To ask how to feed my toddler?!

[Lovelost01]

DS is 22 months and for the last 8 weeks has stopped eating. He had his ‘favourites’ that I would always fall back on like yoghurt, ready brek and fruit but now he wont eat those. An example would be what he ate yesterday-

1 strawberry for breakfast (offered cereal, toast, yoghurt and a mixture of fruit)

Point blank refused any type of snack

Pasta n sauce packet for lunch (ate roughly 10 small pieces of pasta before constantly throwing the rest on the floor)

Managed to get him to drink some milk in the afternoon

Dinner- 2 french fries (offered french fries, chicken nuggets and sweetcorn)

Tried to feed him some porridge before bed, he didn’t eat that but ended up eating a small petit filous yoghurt.

This has become standard now, my HV has said its normal for this to happen for a few days every so often but I think she thinks I’m lying about how long its been going on for an the extent of it. Meal times have become so fustrating I’ve had to start leaving the room because I’m crying. He wont take anything from a spoon from me, he just wont eat!

It's completely normal OP.. .I tell you what though I'll get my arse handed to me on a plate for saying this on here...don't give him processed foods.

Nuggets, yogurt etc...packet sauces. Give fresh...it will be much nicer.

I think it's really common at that age for children to become really difficult over food. It is the one area they actually have control over. Try to it get stressed - the less effect his behaviour has on you the better. My son (now 18 and 6 foot, eats like a horse) scarred me for life with regards to food at that age! He had a very small appetite and was really really fussy. He didn't really properly enjoy food til about age 14.

Honestly it is normal for them to go through phases like this. I know it can be very worrying but if it’s only started 8 weeks ago and he’s otherwise okay then it probably is just a phase. Could he be teething?

I know it’s so much easier said than done when they aren’t eating but the worst thing you can do is panic about it as he’ll pick that up off you in two seconds flat. Just keep doing what you’re doing and offer him a mixture of food.

It doesn’t sound like a lot but actually ten pieces of pasta at that age is probably enough for a full portion and he’s had a yoghurt and milk as well. So he isn’t going to starve. You just need to try and stay relaxed and make him think it’s no big deal. Also maybe try mixing things up a bit if feeding’s become a battle ground so change where you feed him. Or try plonking him down in front of the tv. If he’s already in front of the tv then try putting him somewhere else.

It’s also normal for a lot of food to get thrown around at that stage and you really don’t know how much they are actually eating but I promise you it’s a phase. A sure fire way to turn it into a long term thing is by getting stressed out about it. for you, you sound at your wits end!

Is he gaining weight? Plenty energy? Some toddlers I know seem to exist perfectly happily on next to nothing. Offer food regularly, no fuss if it's rejected.

He’s lost some weight since this bout of no eating started but only 1.5 kg

Firstly, hard though it is, try not to stress about it. They do go through very obstinate phases with food & it feels like they're starving, but they're fine - it's pretty standard toddler behaviour! Our 2yr old went for about a year only eating half a dozen things on rotation!! I was at my wit's end at one point but now he's a strapping 12yr old who will try literally anything & is constantly fridge surfing!!

Let him eat with his fingers - put a few things in front of him & then leave him to it - keep an eye on him but don't sit & focus 100% on him, trying to force him to eat. He may well just chuck everything away to start with but he's probably trying to get a reaction from you. Just keep going with a variety of things & see what happens - give him his favourite yoghurts with a spoon & let him do it himself - a lot of food refusing at this age is to do with control. Try all sorts of things & don't think that each meal 'has to be' what you think, ie, it doesn't matter if he has fruit & yoghurt for tea or veggies for breakfast, etc. Just experiment & keep offering milk.

Good luck!! You sound like you're doing a great job. This parenting lark is bloody hard!!

My DS is the same age and loves to eat the same as we do so we have lunch and tea early so we can eat with him. His favourite at the moment is fajitas, so he has a plate with chicken, peppers, avocado, cheese and whatever else we are having in them, with a quarter of a tortilla. He just uses his hands to eat whatever combination he feels like, and we have ours as fajitas. He also likes helping to cook, so helps make pizza dough and then put the toppings on. Just offer a variety of things, even if it is not a "meal" that he can help himself to. DS also likes to use the cutlery himself even though it is very messy.

Have you tried letting him eat in front of his favourite tv programme or film ? Sounds simple but my little boy seems to eat a lot more when he zoned out a little bit

Same here OP. One of my DC used to be a great eater but has been just awful the last few months. I worry about vitamin/iron deficiencies, do people give supplements during these phases??