To think a person’s religion doesn’t mean you like or dislike children?

[TheCrystalVase]

NC in case my mums on here

Yesterday at a hospital appointment for DD, DM tags along (I don’t mind, usually means she pays for parking/lunch). DD has SN; she’s 4 and absolutely loves lifts. 3 of us get on the lift and there’s already a lady in there, she’s very obviously a nun from the way she’s dressed.

I explain to DD how to make the lift work and she excitedly pushed the button for the floor we want, the other lady then turns to her and says “Do you want to press the top button for me? As that’s the floor I’ll be getting off at” DD nods excitedly, presses the button and turns to her and says “Thank you, that’s very kind” (Anyone who does anything nice for her is very kind in her mind).

At the top floor the lady gets off, turns back to DD and says “You’re a very polite little girl, well done” smiled and then the doors closed and off we went to our floor.

My mum said later that she was surprised the nun was so nice to DD as nuns usually don’t like children. When questioned further she said that all the nuns she’s come across don’t like children and go out of their way to avoid them. She said usually if she’s with DD she’ll avoid nuns if she can as they generally don’t like children

AIBU to think that the ladies religion didn’t mean she disliked children? I know Nuns are celibate but surely that doesn’t mean they dislike children they have just chosen not to commit to anyone to have their own? (obviously in some cases they will dislike children but that won’t be everyone)
To think a person’s religion doesn’t mean you like or dislike children?
NC in case my mums on here

Yesterday at a hospital appointment for DD, DM tags along (I don’t mind, usually means she pays for parking/lunch). DD has SN; she’s 4 and absolutely loves lifts. 3 of us get on the lift and there’s already a lady in there, she’s very obviously a nun from the way she’s dressed.

I explain to DD how to make the lift work and she excitedly pushed the button for the floor we want, the other lady then turns to her and says “Do you want to press the top button for me? As that’s the floor I’ll be getting off at” DD nods excitedly, presses the button and turns to her and says “Thank you, that’s very kind” (Anyone who does anything nice for her is very kind in her mind).

At the top floor the lady gets off, turns back to DD and says “You’re a very polite little girl, well done” smiled and then the doors closed and off we went to our floor.

My mum said later that she was surprised the nun was so nice to DD as nuns usually don’t like children. When questioned further she said that all the nuns she’s come across don’t like children and go out of their way to avoid them. She said usually if she’s with DD she’ll avoid nuns if she can as they generally don’t like children

AIBU to think that the ladies religion didn’t mean she disliked children? I know Nuns are celibate but surely that doesn’t mean they dislike children they have just chosen not to commit to anyone to have their own? (obviously in some cases they will dislike children but that won’t be everyone)

obviously in some cases they will dislike children but that won’t be everyone

What's obvious about that?

I don't see how your DM has made this connection at all? Some people don't like children. That's it - The End. Their vocation or lack of it has nothing to do with anything.

When I read your title I thought “Of course not!” but actually I now realise I have the same expectation of nuns. I’m not sure why exactly - I suppose I think of them (stereotype alert) as severe and unsmiling etc. Odder still because our local vicar is a 30-something woman who is incredibly warm and good with kids, so I’m not sure why I expect differently of nuns.

Of course nuns may like children, what a ridiculous statement that they don’t.

Yesterday at a hospital appointment for DD, DM tags along (I don’t mind, usually means she pays for parking/lunch).

A bit sad that you only like DM coming along to appointments because she pays for lunch / parking. Do you ever see her when she’s not expected to pay for something?

Do you ever see her when she’s not expected to pay for something?

Yep, twice a week we visit at minimum. She enjoys playing with DD and taking her to the park, or I cook for her or we meet up for a hot chocolate and a cake (take it in turns to pay). She likes to come to DDs hospital appointments although not obliged.

There are people in all walks of life who like children, and who don't like children. They're religion, or lack thereof, has never been a factor in my experience.

Their 🙄

Was she educated by nuns? I know people who have been and
who have a distinctly ....jaundiced.....view of them.

I don’t mind, usually means she pays for parking/lunch

Charming!!!

Was she educated by nuns?

No her mother was religious but CofE and sent DM and her sisters to a private school that was none religious.

1. Being a nun is not a religion.
2. Being a nun has nothing to do with liking or not liking children.
3. Lots of nuns are involved in caring for children in schools, orphanages and so on.
4. Mother Teresa was a nun. Does she think that Mother Teresa did not like children?

This is all completely bizarre.

What an odd thing to associate nuns with.
I remember as a child i met some nuns and they were the sweetest women. My mum had a delivery for their monastery and i tagged along and i remember being hugged and squeezed and they had the warmest smile i have ever received from strangers.

“4. Mother Teresa was a nun. Does she think that Mother Teresa did not like children?”

Unmmm. Where would you like me to start?

I’m absolutely sure it’s not the case that nuns in general dislike children but the only nuns I’ve met have been teaching in schools and they all have given the impression that they dislike children. Maybe your mum has just had similar experiences?

BertrandRussell I was thinking the same thing too.

There have been lots of media reports of nuns who have abused their power and abused vulnerable women and children. I had a relative who was brought up by nuns in a children’s home who by today’s standards we would say were abusive. She never thought they were because without them then she would have had no one to look after her.

I was educated by nuns. A complete mixed bag with the odd battle axe but mainly bright, kind, gentle women who adored their pupils. We had great fun and far from being overly strict or abusive most spoiled us.
It’s down to the nuns that I was encouraged to loose my estuary accent and aspire to university. They taught me so much more than French and Latin.

Mother Teresa was a nun. Does she think that Mother Teresa did not like children?

Oh dear. I don't think citing Mother Teresa as an example of kindness is a wise move in any circumstances.

As someone said up thread, if you were convent educated, there's a pretty good chance you'd conclude nuns don't like children.

My siblings and j all endured a catholic upbringing. We're all still terrified of nuns 😂

That's so random. In my head nuns like children and a lot are teachers....in Italy a lot of private schools are run by nuns and my nursery was.

I'm probably a bit biased as I hear 'nun' and think elderly kindly nursery teachers.

why would anyone not like a well behaved child.

Fräulein Maria was pretty fond of children.

Mother Teresa was a nun. Does she think that Mother Teresa did not like children? possibly not the best example.
I think that the stereotype of a trick nuns in schools etc. could make you think that. Lots of children have suffered ill treatment at the hands of nuns throughout the years.
But I wouldn’t assume all nuns dislike children, no.