When is a reasonable amount of time for new DP to meet toddler?

[user71767]

Do you think there's a set time limit before it should happen?
Is it more dependent on circumstances rather than a time limit?
What's your opinion?

I won’t be introducing any boyfriends to my toddler until I know it’s a “permanent” thing. I can’t imgaine for me that would be less than 18 months.

My mother brought boyfriends home / into our lives all the time when we were kids and it was enormously damaging to my relationship with her, and my sense of security.

A couple of years??!!
Seriously, that's insane.

Depends if he’s a DP or just a boyfriend. A good year minimum.
Longer the better definitely no overnights and no kissing cuddling.

My ex husband justified introducing his girlfriend after 2 months "because my children are an important part of my life and any girlfriend needs to know them" at 3 months she dumped him. The second girlfriend was introduced 2 months later, not sure how long the relationship was going before that.
However my children are "so important" that he won't see them on the weekend only on school nights (hmm 1 weekend in nearly 2 years) so make of that what you will.
I don't think my ex's girlfriend was posting on here worrying about it at all. So kudos to any parent or new partner that actually puts a bit of thought into it, even if no one can agree how long to wait.

Oh and very first introduction to the 1st girlfriend post divorce?
Sorry DS you're sleeping on the sofa not the air bed on daddy's floor because is sleeping in with daddy.

Winner. No idea why I felt the need to divorce!

How long have you known him? If he's someone you've known a very long time and have recently got together with, then to me that's quite different to someone you may only have met for the first time within the last few months. If it's the latter, then I'd make a Sarah's Law application to the police. (You wouldn't send your dc to a nursery where staff weren't DBS checked...)

Tread carefully.

Absolutely no set limit. It would depend on how long I had known him, how confident I was in my judgment of him, my toddler’s personality, his family situation etc.

I knew my husband for ages before we got together, and my family knew his family. We waited almost a year before I introduced him to the DC and that was very casually as "mummy's friend". It was another year before there were any sleepovers.

Yes it was hard, but my sex life does not come before my children's security.

We are very happily married now and we have a very happy family life. It was worth the wait.

I judge people who introduce their new partner within weeks. There's absolutely no way you can be sure things will work out, or that the new partner is a safe person to have around DC, or if the relationship will be long term

I felt from very early on that DH was going to be the man I married, but I'm human and I'm not infallible so I bloody well waited to make sure.

I get that it's difficult dating as a single mum, but that's frankly tough. We can't have everything we want as and when we want it. If a man isn't prepared to understand that, and to wait, then he's not a good man.

I'd rather have lost a boyfriend or two than lose the respect of my children