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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Aibu to think that they don't get to stay in the property after completion date?

74 replies

Madmilkmaid · 12/06/2019 23:57

OK, so I'm no expert on buying/selling property so I'm confused (and pissed off a little tbh).

So DP has agreed to buy ExW out of their house. This was all agreed 5 months ago with them coming to an agreement about the finances etc. All good.

So he suggested a completion date when it was discussed 5 months ago and she asked for an extra month (so 6 months to get organised and find somewhere else) and DP agreed with no issues.
So we are now 6 weeks before the completion date and she's just told him she's put an offer in on a flat but there is no way it will have all gone through by the arranged completion date. That she still wants the money in her account that day but that she won't be moving out of the house until she has completed on her new flat. This could be 2+ months after the agreed date.
So this means my DP will have to extend his contract on his rental property, will be paying rent and a mortgage all whilst she lives in the house. She's said that she won't be paying any rent (he did mention that the house will legally be his and therefore she will need to pay rent for the time she overstays) and that she will move out when she's ready after she has received the cash and got her new place sorted.

I really needed a rant but also needed u good people of MN to tell me if im BU to be so annoyed. Its set our plans back by God knows how long and financially messed things up for us for those first few months.
How can somebody take the cash then refuse to move out!

OP posts:

Original poster

Madmilkmaid · 13/06/2019 15:49

Yes it could all be done on the same day it's just that this could be a couple of mo ths after the date she agreed to vacate and complete on 5 months ago. As there had been no mention of her buying and therefore any issues with this date until now DP will need to extend his rental agreement (if they let him do this for a couple of months) or move to a temp short term rental. He also has contractors etc booked in for just after the arranged date as the house needs some pretty major work done on it. This will all need to be cancelled and rearranged therefore setting everything back. If we knew she hadn't organised to leave on that date DP may have been able to move the agreed date and get organised himself. As it stands he's a little in limbo as has no idea if she will leave on the agreed date (her flat completing in time) or not.

OP posts:

Dungeondragon15 · 13/06/2019 16:04

That sounds inconvenient but there is probably nothing he can do to speed up the transfer if she wants to delay. All he can do is rrefuse to give her money if she is not ready to move out.

fargo123 · 14/06/2019 06:23

So many people desperate to see the man in the wrong, but I can't say that I am surprised.

Agreed.

In this case, the ex wife is 100% in the wrong. If she hasn't got herself organised during the six month completion period then that's her tough luck, and not the ex husband's problem.

No way would I be facilitating her staying in the house after the completion date, nor would I be paying her any money until she was out.

Frouby · 14/06/2019 06:35

Just no.

Move in around her, sure she will find somewhere pdq then.

If there were dcs involved it would be slightly different. But a single woman needs to sort her own accommodation out.

Just let the solicitor sort it. That's what you pay them for.

Dungeondragon15 · 14/06/2019 07:47

In this case, the ex wife is 100% in the wrong. If she hasn't got herself organised during the six month completion period then that's her tough luck, and not the ex husband's problem.

You are correct that she is in the wrong but I don't think you are correct that it is her "tough luck". If she wants to delay the transfer of equity and stay in the house she probably can. All the OP's DH can do is not give her the money.

WhereDoesThisToiletGo · 14/06/2019 07:55

Ex wife can arrange a short term let.
Or put her stuff in storage and stay in a an airbnb for a month or so.

Dungeondragon15 · 14/06/2019 08:00

Ex wife can arrange a short term let.
Or put her stuff in storage and stay in a an airbnb for a month or so.

She can but if she doesn't have to why would she?

stucknoue · 14/06/2019 08:04

Extend the completion date.

WhereDoesThisToiletGo · 14/06/2019 08:52

She can but if she doesn't have to why would she?
She agreed the transfer date 6 months ago and now she is the one who wants to change it.

Dungeondragon15 · 14/06/2019 09:04

"She agreed the transfer date 6 months ago and now she is the one who wants to change it."

I said why "would" she not why "should she".?This kind of thing happens all the time when people are buying and selling houses. Ultimately you shouldn't make plans for anything until things are signed as you can't force the other party to do anything until that point. I understand that this is a transfer of equity rather than a normal house sale but presumably the same thing applies in that nothing has been signed over yet and until that happens the DP can't force her out as she still owns half the house. All he can do is refuse to give her the money but she probably doesn't need it yet anyway.

Original poster

Madmilkmaid · 14/06/2019 09:27

Dungeondragon15

You are right. If she doesnt want to stick to the agreed date there isn't much he can do about it. Although it was agreed as part of their financial agreement so I don't know if her breaking that contract could mean he can change the agreed amount to take into account extra expenses he will incur. I'm not sure.
The way he has seen it different to a normal house buying process and booked in builders etc is because unlike a normal process that can be held up with chains, searches, solicitors being slow etc none of that was relevant. It's a couple of forms to sign on the agreed date and that's it.

WhereDoesThisToiletGo
I'm kind of in the mindset that if she couldn't arrange for somewhere to stay in the 6 months then why should DP be left in limbo until the last minute and then possibly need to sort somewhere to live (extend rental contract, find somewhere else short term)

It's going to have to be a sit back and wait to see what happens or accept that the agreed date needs to be moved to a couple of months down the line and suck it up. Hope that she will be made to cover his extra expenses (doubt it though!)

Again thanks for the replies. It's always good to see people's opinions. Hard to think straight when ur involved in things.

OP posts:

Dungeondragon15 · 14/06/2019 09:36

The way he has seen it different to a normal house buying process and booked in builders etc is because unlike a normal process that can be held up with chains, searches, solicitors being slow etc none of that was relevant. It's a couple of forms to sign on the agreed date and that's it.

Yes, I can see that he thought it would be different but actually there is now a chain if she is going to buy. It's not much different to the seller saying that they will move into rented accommodation and then changing their minds. There isn't much he can do apart from threaten to pull out if she doesn't sign and move out by a certain date. Perhaps that will concentrate her mind.

MidniteScribbler · 14/06/2019 10:08

I said why "would" she not why "should she".?This kind of thing happens all the time when people are buying and selling houses.

But in this case, the ex wife wants the money for the sale transferred to her AND she wants to stay as long as she wants. She doesn't get both. No money until she moves out.

LakieLady · 14/06/2019 10:20

If he's getting a mortgage to raise the money to transfer to her, he needs to check how long the mortgage offer is valid for.

If the mortgage offer expires before the transfer date, which should also be the date she moves out, he will have to either get an extension on the mortgage offer (which may not be possible) or reapply for a mortgage.

FizzyGreenWater · 14/06/2019 10:23

No money transfer until she moves out. Quite simple!

MzHz · 14/06/2019 10:53

She moves into an Airbnb

No excuses,
No cash until she’s out.

He can’t negotiate on this, she’s taking the piss and she knows it.

He needs legal advice NOW to explain what could go wrong so as to make sure he doesn’t agree to anything

WhereDoesThisToiletGo · 14/06/2019 11:00

If there were children involved , I would say ex wife stays until her new place is ready but there aren't

Dungeondragon15 · 14/06/2019 11:15

But in this case, the ex wife wants the money for the sale transferred to her AND she wants to stay as long as she wants. She doesn't get both. No money until she moves out.

Yes, I said the only thing he can do is not give her the money. He probably can't make her move out any quicker though.

TurquoiseDress · 14/06/2019 11:21

I think this sounds like something for the solicitors to sort out

She definitely cannot be staying on in the property once completion has happened and she is in receipt of her share of the funds- she essentially will no longer own any part of the property and so has no legal right to remain living there

Unless your DP agrees to here living there after completion date, but that would be a whole world of complication and headaches!

ReanimatedSGB · 14/06/2019 13:04

Yes I think it has to be a case of she doesn't get a penny till she's actually out, and stick to it.

Walkamileinmyshoesbeforeujudge · 14/06/2019 13:06

Suggest a short term 'tenancy' to her. With the going monthly rent.. She is a massive cf.

LadyRannaldini · 14/06/2019 22:00

Don’t be mean. You’re getting her husband and her house. You can wait a couple of months

Utter rubbish, their personal position is irrelevant, she has to be out on completion. It's not 'her house', it's 'their house', yours is an attitude that gets women a bad name!

WhiteRedRose · 14/06/2019 22:05

Change the completion date OP to the date she moves. And tell her she wont get the money until that day.

Winchestermom35 · 15/06/2019 20:37

I work for a mortgage lender. We would not be happy at all with the ex wife remaining in the property.

Quite aside from the concern over your partner paying a mortgage & rent for the foreseeable, wed never be comfortable that she’s leave at all

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