Sad - Husbands Family did not say Happy Birthday

[tryingtobereal]

I feel a little silly writing this, but I live abroad for husbands work and don't have anyone to confide in.

Since I began dating my husband and met his family, usually every year I get happy birthday's from members of his family. Just a small message, cards, or gifts - a lovely thought and the message has always been more than enough. I have always been on top of there birthday's, sending gifts to the kids, close family and cards to everyone. Birthdays are a big deal in his family and everyone always goes crazy celebrating!

This is our second married birthday, and I heard nothing from anyone. They knew it was my birthday since it was all over social media etc. I told my husband I was sad nobody reached out to me a few days after since I continue to make a real effort. He said that he was sorry and that they apparently told him to wish me one from them. But I don't believe it since they all have my details and he only mentioned this after I said something.

I had to move to the US for my husbands work and I haven't made it back to the UK very often to see everyone. But I have done my best to keep up a dialogue, so I feel very snubbed.

Am I overreacting because of feeling far from home?

Happy birthday!
As they’ve always wished you well before, I’d let it go and not interpret it as a snub at all.
Adult birthdays aren’t that important to a lot of people. I expect they just weren’t on SM that day to be reminded! If you weren’t feeling isolated by the move, you probably wouldn’t care as much.

I have always been on top of there birthday's, sending gifts to the kids, close family and cards to everyone

Happy Birthday!

As they (apparently) asked DH to wish you happy birthday but didn't give you a card or pressie, they have signalled that they will not be sending you cards/pressies.

So it's time to stop being 'on top' of their birthdays. Let DH deal with their birthdays! You concentrate on your own family or friends that actually make an effort with you. Stop doing the wifework of birthday.

I was married for 10 years befriend got a birthday card from my in-laws. This was after some long-term badgering from my husband. They didn’t/don’t like me very much!

Happy Birthday

TBH there are families that go wild celebrating birthdays and special occasions, one of my sister's goes mad when I don't wish her Happy Anniversary wishes and she's married over 20 years, I'd be the type of person who would always contact my own family and wish them a Happy Birthday and send a gift if I had some spare cash, sometimes I might be a couple of days late doing so, but remembering dh's families birthday's only for FB birthday reminders I'd be none the wiser, even then I wouldn't be over the top at contacting them, I think as we get older, it becomes less important to send birthday wishes. Once your own family as in your dh / children recognised the day I'd be happy with that.

Good point from Antigon. Not in a tit for tat way, to leave it to your husband... but because why wasn’t he bothering in the first place?