What’s the deal with going to a wedding without a plus one??

[Shootingstar1115]

Hi all, I’m in a long term relationship with my partner of 7 years and we have two DC.

My friend is getting married in a couple months and myself and OH have been invited.

I’m not sure if we will have anyone to look after the children so he will most likely stay at home with them whilst I attend. It’s a local wedding so not travelling involved thankfully.

When I told she seemed surprised and asked if wanted to take another plus one?? 🤣

I’m not sure what she means by that, most of my friends will already be at the wedding and it’s not like I’m gonna go out and find a date to take (obviously I wouldn’t, I have a partner whom I will marry one day).

Why is it so bad for me to attend alone? 🤷‍♀️ It doesn’t really bother me and I will know a lot of people there anyway!

It’s putting doubt in my mind now. I was pretty confident about going myself but now I’m doubting myself!

Turning up solo to a wedding is absolutely fine - no-one even notices. Bride was probably just checking to see if she needed to adjust the catering numbers.

Yeah I'd presume bride was checking whether you wanted to bring someone else or if you were fine; in which case she can change the catering numbers etc. I don't think she was pushing you into bringing someone

There is no issue going solo, she was probably being kind giving you the option. Sounds like a nice friend.

I would just check that she's not planning to do some horrific "mix-up, make friends" seating plan and seat everyone with their partner and a bunch of complete strangers. But otherwise not odd at all, I think it would be stranger to take a different +1 if you know lots of others there!

I think the bride's suggestion was a bit weird considering you have a partner of 7 years. Most brides would surely have a list of people who coud fill the vacancy?

Either she has already invited everyone she wishes to attend the wedding and is having a big wedding or she doesn't know many people so the place will be wasted if you don't take a plus one.

It could just be nice of the bride to think you may need someone else to keep you company. What about taking a sister (if you have one) but if you don't then don't worry about being alone, especially as you know others who are going.

It sounds like she was just making a polite offer. My dh and I have gone to lots of weddings solo (probably more, actually, than we've gone together) due to them either being childfree weddings (abroad! who does that?!) or them being evening invites and us not having childcare, etc.

I think she just wanted to make sure. If you didn't really know anyone else you may have wanted someone for company that you know. If you are happy on your own and know other people there so you are not going to feel awkward then that is fine.

Ive been to a wedding alone before. It's really not an issue.

That was very nice of your friend to offer an invite for a different partner. (I am sure she didn't mean opposite sex necessarily - just a friend). It's a shame you both can't go. There probably will be other singles, but that's not quite the point. It's nice not to go as a single.

Unless I knew none of the other guests at the wedding I'd be fine going solo. I've done it a few times because I didn't have childcare and it was fine.

Why is it putting doubt in your mind? Either go alone, or find a babysitter and go with your bf or ask if you can take your children.

I don’t think it weird that the bride asked if you wanted to take someone else in place of your husband. Some people can feel anxious going on their own to these types of things. I don’t think it off at all but rather caring on behalf of the bride. Up to you to RSVP for one or two.

I find weddings hugely dull anyway, but a singleton, I've only ever attended alone and it's even more boring.

I would love to be invited with a plus one. Be aware, as a single for the night you might be seated with people who are known for being boring/difficult/awkward. I think the theory is that you will be forced to talk to each other instead of sitting in silence.

if you know a lot of other guests, you might still find you are put on a table with this kind of person. ugh.

My bet is that the seating plan is already done and there’s now a space on your table.