Does this make me look like a shit parent or am I overthinking/being stupid?

[user918]

DS stayed with his dad last night. The arrangement agreed was that he'd be dropped to nursery. There's been a couple of occasions in the past where he hasn't been dropped to nursery and I haven't been told (by him).
We have no contact really, in the midst of going through solicitors so can't message him, does it look like terrible parenting if I ring the nursery and check if my child is there?
I feel like a complete tool as I think I should know where my child is all of the time!

I’d go and explain exactly what’s going on and get nursery on side.

I think that's fair enough, just explain he's been at his dad's house. Just that, no other info needed. A shit parent wouldn't care where her kid was! You do so YADNBU

I too would speak to the nursery and let them know the situation. I am sure they won't mind confirming if your DS is there or not.

Definitely not unreasonable to ring and check, I agree that they’ll totally understand. I’m sure you’re not the first family they’ve come across with a situation like this. Try not to worry what they’ll be thinking.

Yanbu, definitely go in and speak to the nursery about your situation. At ours, if ds isnt there and we havent let them know they will follow up with both parents.

This is what a good parent does. It doesn’t matter what they think of it. You want to know where your son is. End of story.

Just call nursery to see how he is, that’s fine. I do it occasionally if there’s been a bad drop off/sleepless night etc.

Your fretting and you needn't be, call them and put your mind at rest. They'll totally understand.

Nursery shouldn't mind confirming whether your DS is there or not. Of course you want to know. This isn't being a 'helicopter parent'.

Who is supposed to be picking him up at the end of the day?

No OP it makes you the opposite of a shit parent .

Thanks everyone. Glad I called because he wasn't even dropped off!!!!!

@user918 oh god!! What now?