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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to want to keep my house?

92 replies

NotJustACigar · 09/06/2019 12:18

DH and I will be moving abroad next year for his job - his employer will provide housing. We will be gone for 3 years and when we come back we'll get another assignment in Britain but again DH's employer will provide housing.

So we don't really need our house for the forseeable future but I'm struggling with the idea of selling it because I love my house. I personally have put a ton of time and effort renovating it and have finally got it just how I want it to be. And I love the location, the neighbours, etc.

DH wants to sell because we don't need it and because it's not the kind of house that most people would want to rent as it's quite large (5 beds). He also thinks renting would be a hassle.

I want to keep it not just because I love it but because it keeps us on the housing ladder. I also gives us a place to keep our savings and to save more - over the next 3 years we would pay off the mortgage instead of keeping the money in the bank. And I think due to Brexit house prices are depressed now but will hopefully rise in the medium term. So I see keeping the house as a good investment.

So who IBU, me or DH?

OP posts:
SkintAsASkintThing · 09/06/2019 12:19

I wouldn't sell. Absolutely no way.......could you air B&B it ?? And hire a.company to do.cleaning etc ??

CuriousaboutSamphire · 09/06/2019 12:21

Hand it over to a good agent. I put tenants into 5-bed houses every week. They tend to stay for 2 -3 years and, if you get a good, proactive agent, cause litle hassle.

Neither of you ABU - but your DH is being quite short sighted. You need another discusssion about the pros and cons. Get some proper information on costs from an agent or two then talk again, see what suits you both!

CanBlondesWearMustard · 09/06/2019 12:23

I would definitely keep it. With a lot of upheaval it would be nice to have a constant. Could you afford to pay the mortgage whilst living elsewhere, do you have to pay towards the house the employer will provide?

If you really want to keep it and worry about renting a 5 bed, you could always rent it at the price of a 3 bed, I suppose you don't really need market rate.

But remember the house you come back to won't quite be the one you left once other people have been living their lives in it.

powershowerforanhour · 09/06/2019 12:23

Keep it. You're moving for his job so I think this is a life decision that you should get to make

SmilingThroughIt · 09/06/2019 12:23

Yanbu. Anything could happen with your dh job or your dh. I wouldnt make such a huge decision based on being so dependent on the employer. At least you will have a home to come to should anything happen.

hormonesorDHbeingadick · 09/06/2019 12:24

You can always try the rental market and if it’s not working out then think about selling.

CripsSandwiches · 09/06/2019 12:25

Since the mortgage is almost paid off you'll surely be able to rent it through a good agent while still covering costs and earning you some money. I wouldn't sell in your situation.

Pipandmum · 09/06/2019 12:25

Plenty of people want a big house and there aren’t that many on the rental market. Don’t speculate get a couple agents in find out!

MRex · 09/06/2019 12:25

I'd definitely keep it and rent it out. Put any furniture that's particularly important to you into storage and replace it with something for the rental period.

Matildatoldsuchdreadfullies · 09/06/2019 12:26

Honestly, I think falling off the housing ladder is always a mistake. And the five bedroom (very shabby) house next door to me rented easily enough.

But I do get your DH's concerns. Could you sell your house and buy a flat (small, but in the most expensive area you can afford)? That way, you're still on the housing ladder, but you don't have the upkeep of a large property.

longearedbat · 09/06/2019 12:26

Keep it. No one knows what the future holds. I wouldn't want to be dependent on my employers for housing either. It won't cause you any hassle if you use a good letting agent, and at least you will always have the comfort of knowing, if things ever go tits up, you have got something to fall back on/live in.

PatoPotato · 09/06/2019 12:27

You can try to put it for rent but you need to be very careful that you get good tenants otherwise you could have someone living there, damaging it, and not paying you.

MigGril · 09/06/2019 12:28

I'd keep it and rent out not for sentimental reasons but to stay on the housing ladder. Unless you invest wisely and save you could struggle to buy again in the future if you need to.

Settlersofcatan · 09/06/2019 12:31

I think as you're travelling for his job, you should get to make the call on the house.

BarbedBloom · 09/06/2019 12:34

I would keep it but do bear in mind that if you rent it out, it may not be returned in the same condition. I only mention it as you said you finally have it how you want it

DaphneduM · 09/06/2019 12:39

I would rent it out, too. It keeps a foothold on the UK property market, and protects you in case anything should happen, employment wise. Get a good, professional letting agent and ensure they do regular inspections. You will have to accept, as the previous poster said, that it may need some repairs and redecorating at the end of the tenancy. Such is the nature of renting out property.

BananaCatto · 09/06/2019 12:41

Rent it out! Lots of large properties around me are rented out and snapped up quickly. We rented a 6 bedroom house for 3 years whilst we got our company off the ground and ready to buy a house. We had lots of income to afford a house but no accounts behind us to get a mortgage hence renting

DizzySue · 09/06/2019 12:42

No way would I sell.

Stay on the housing ladder, it'll be worth even more when you return.

Ninkaninus · 09/06/2019 12:42

Absolutely do not sell it. You do not actually know how things will go in the next few years.

Notabedofroses · 09/06/2019 12:44

Don't sell.

Things could change, and you may want to move back. Rent it out, and then you have a home and life to move back to if you need to.

We see some many threads on here about people that hate life overseas. Keep your options firmly open.

ClaudiaWankleman · 09/06/2019 12:44

What happens if you get 18 months into the move and decide you can't bear it?
Or elderly parents/ a family incident prompts a move back home?

You should keep the house as a back up option.

snowbear66 · 09/06/2019 12:45

I would keep it too.
You never know what the future holds, but you can always make the decision to sell in a few years time if your plans have changed.
Perhaps if you do all the legwork first, and just hand over to him as a done deal?
If you sell the money may well just get drizzled away after a few years.

BackforGood · 09/06/2019 12:46

I would certainly want to stay on the property ladder, so would lean towards renting it out. However, if you love it so much, you have to be realistic and realise that, if it is rented out, it won't necessarily be in the same condition when you come back, at least 6 years later.

oneforthepain · 09/06/2019 12:47

I also think it would be short sighted to sell it off. At some point you will no longer be in employer housing and any cash from selling it will not have grown at anything like the same rate as the property market.

Unless his employer is going to give you a house when he exits their employment you need to factor that future moment into the decisions you make now.

The sentimental side, I'm sure you already know it won't be as it is now when you get it back - but then you're unlikely to still be the person you are now by then, so I imagine you will cope just fine with any changes and may be ready to make your own.

The only family I know in a similar position to you, of being moved periodically from one location to another in job provided accommodation, also kept their own property as part of the long term security planning for after the job eventually ends.

oneforthepain · 09/06/2019 12:47

I also think it would be short sighted to sell it off. At some point you will no longer be in employer housing and any cash from selling it will not have grown at anything like the same rate as the property market.

Unless his employer is going to give you a house when he exits their employment you need to factor that future moment into the decisions you make now.

The sentimental side, I'm sure you already know it won't be as it is now when you get it back - but then you're unlikely to still be the person you are now by then, so I imagine you will cope just fine with any changes and may be ready to make your own.

The only family I know in a similar position to you, of being moved periodically from one location to another in job provided accommodation, also kept their own property as part of the long term security planning for after the job eventually ends.