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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Vindictive child bullying neighbours

24 replies

Deepbreath123 · 07/06/2019 17:12

Our neighbours hate us because we did an extension which they didn’t want to happen............3yrs ago!
Ever since we do not have any kInd of working relationship with them (after the building work they spent a year putting on really loud music every day and then going out, when we had a newborn)...
if our son (5yrs) accidentally knocks his ball over the fence (which is very rare as we don’t let him Play football in the garden anymore), they deliberately give the ball to their dog to burst then chuck it back over the fence (we’ve witnessed this more than once)
It’s so malicious- not to mention they have children themselves, and she’s is “supposed” to be a counsellor-what kind of example is that!
Whilst I appreciate it can be a pain if a ball keeps going over, but it is so rare, and we don’t pester for it back at all.
We’re so fed up with this malicious behaviour what can we do if anything?!

OP posts:
PutyourtoponTrevor · 07/06/2019 17:14

Move?

Longdistance · 07/06/2019 17:19

Did you report them for playing their music when out to the council?

I had a neighbour who thought he could be an arse with his music, I worked shifts at the time so I played my music loud and left the house 🤷🏼‍♀️ He never did it again, that and my stereo was powerful Grin

UnicornBrexit · 07/06/2019 17:19

keep your balls in your own garden ?

yellowgreenbluepurple · 07/06/2019 17:23

They were clearly very childish about the extension but if the music happened for a year presumably you've had two years without it. So is the issue just the balls being damaged? Which to be honest I think is an issue on both sides, having it knocked over all the time is annoying.

NorthEndGal · 07/06/2019 17:24

If it hardly ever happens, it's really an issue, is it?

Dana28 · 07/06/2019 17:27

Isn't the dog allowed out in its own garden. What do you think they are making the dog puncture it

Dana28 · 07/06/2019 17:27

Why do you think?

Honeybee85 · 07/06/2019 17:31

I had some seriously nasty neighbours and found out that it’s really difficult to get them to stop such behaviour. Some people are just hardwired bullies.

I moved to another place eventually and comforted myself in the thought that they had to live with themselves every day and that karma is a bitch.

Northernparent68 · 07/06/2019 17:43

Can you sit down and talk to them ? Their behaviour is bad but extensions are a pain, the building work is noisy, and the results are an eye sore, and result in loss of privacy, and light.

NameChangeNugget · 07/06/2019 17:43

This reply has been deleted

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Millie2018 · 07/06/2019 17:44

I had awful neighbours. We were end of terrace and only had one set! They were polite to us, but drank way too much, loads of arguments late into the night, music on loud in the garden. We ended up moving. We disclosed the issues we had had with them on our moving pack. Ended up selling to a large group of men who were going to move in loads of people. They had no issue with the noise we declared, promising me they would make twice as much. Still makes me snigger now.

HomeMadeMadness · 07/06/2019 17:46

keep your balls in your own garden ?

What a stupid response. OP said the ball rarely goes over and the neighbours have been doing other malicious things.

FrancisCrawford · 07/06/2019 17:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MorondelaFrontera · 07/06/2019 17:47

they deliberately give the ball to their dog to burst then chuck it back over the fence (we’ve witnessed this more than once)

is that all?
It's not pleasant by all means, but if that's all they do and your child no longer plays football in the garden, that should be the end of it surely.

we did an extension which they didn’t want to happen............3yrs ago! but WHY didn't they want it? if it impact on their light, their privacy or something, 3 years on they are still living with the consequences.

omione · 07/06/2019 17:48

Why do people get so upset about a ball landing in their garden ? I get it if you have a greenhouse but if you dont does it matter ? Its better than them having a bloody trampoline that they and their friends bounce for hours every day whilst screaming at the top of their voices

NannyRed · 07/06/2019 17:48

What are they actually doing now to upset you?

MorondelaFrontera · 07/06/2019 17:51

Why do people get so upset about a ball landing in their garden ?

If you have a small garden and it lands on your table, your baby or something, destroys your plants, it can't be that pleasant. Even if you have a big garden actually.

nocoolnamesleft · 07/06/2019 17:54

I think it's a little unreasonable of you to call your child a vindictive bully just for accidentally sending some balls into your neighbour's garden, though I grant that can be pretty annoying.

Lizzie48 · 07/06/2019 17:57

I wouldn't have mentioned the ball, OP, that never ends well on AIBU threads! 😂

The loud music is a pain, though. What times of day are we talking about? And are you sure they're doing it to be malicious? Have you tried to ask them to turn it down?

Why did they oppose your extension?

Whatareyoutalkingabout · 07/06/2019 18:33

I think it's a little unreasonable of you to call your child a vindictive bully just for accidentally sending some balls into your neighbour's garden, though I grant that can be pretty annoying.

GrinGrinGrin This made me laugh!

Original poster
Deepbreath123 · 07/06/2019 22:01

Agreed!!! I know that’s the way to view it, just not quite ready to leave yet..

OP posts:
Original poster
Deepbreath123 · 07/06/2019 22:03

That’s in response to Honeybee85!

OP posts:
Original poster
Deepbreath123 · 07/06/2019 22:06

It’s good to hear diff point of view. I realise it’s only a ball, but when (as someone asked), we’ve witnessed from the window her deliberately giving it to the dog till he bursts it, then chucking it over the fence....when we questioned her before her response was “only a mug throws their ball into the garden with a dog”.....yes that is how she talks about a 5 year old!
After a number of times, it just gets infuriating.

OP posts:
FrancisCrawford · 07/06/2019 22:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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