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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who’s being unreasonable? Parking related

99 replies

FanjoFizz · 04/06/2019 15:35

I got to my DS’s school early because of the rain and I knew parking would be a bloody nightmare. It’s on a busy main road and I usually park quite far away and walk up but it’s torrential here.

I’ve parked as shown on the diagram. There is generally room 2 maybe 3 small cars.

I was parked up and browsing mumsnet when I hear shouting and aggressive beeping. A woman is gesticulating at me furiously so I wound the window down and she was shouting at me to reverse back so she could squeeze in between me and the other car.

I reversed back as much as I can (about 18inches) at which point my sensors are beeping furiously and I can see the bollards very close to my car in the parking camera display.
These bollards actually say “Think! Parking here could endanger a child’s life!” You’re not supposed to park right up to them, they’re there to ensure visibility for people crossing the road.

I tell her I can’t go back any further without hitting the bollard and parking dangerously. I was around 6-12inches from them at this stage.

She started getting really aggressive and saying I have to move back then she can park and I can move forward again.

I said no because I’ll have to reverse out across the gate again when I’m leaving which is when all the kids will be coming out of it and it’ll be really busy. And I don’t want to potentially put anyone in danger. I collect my son 10 mins early from the preschool so I can get to my DD’s school on time, so I would definitely have been leaving earlier than her and would have had to reverse out.

She proceeded to be rude so I said “you’re being rude, your car won’t fit in the space, find another one” and wound my window back up.

She attempted to park with what looked liked 150 mini manoeuvres, eventually parking half hanging out on the road because the car didn’t fit.

As I was getting my son in the car someone else commented to her that she was parked dangerously at which point she pointed aggressively at me and said “Well I wouldn’t have if she had let me into the space. Sensitive cow”.

I was Shock and again called her rude and left.

WIBU to not move?

Who’s being unreasonable? Parking related
OP posts:
LittleLongDog · 04/06/2019 15:37

Why didn’t you just pull forwards so she could park behind you instead?

Original poster
FanjoFizz · 04/06/2019 15:40

Because I would have been blocked in by her

OP posts:
Sirzy · 04/06/2019 15:45

The joys of rainy days outside a school when children will melt if they get wet apparently!

She was being rude but you where also rude to comment back. Just ignore.

Original poster
FanjoFizz · 04/06/2019 15:47

She was being rude but you where also rude to comment back
So just be silent and let her be abusive? All I said was that she was being rude and so I stopped engaging.

OP posts:
EL8888 · 04/06/2019 15:50

She’s unreasonable, rude and aggressive. You got there first and she needs to fit her car in around yours. The sign is there for a reason! Surely she was there to pick up children so why compromise their safety?!

tenbob · 04/06/2019 15:51

I live in London where you learn to park in a space which is the length of your car + 2 inches, or else you can't park

I really can't believe you would have been blocked in by her if you had pulled forward. You may have had to do a 20 point turn to get out, but you wouldn't have been unable to move out

EL8888 · 04/06/2019 15:51

I think you were well within your rights to comment back. You can’t just say stuff and no expect to not be challenged -especially if rude and aggressive

WattdeEll · 04/06/2019 15:53

I wouldn’t have moved for her. She can tit off, demanding you move by being aggressive with the horn and shouting. I also think you were fine to call her out on her rudeness.

HomeMadeMadness · 04/06/2019 15:54

She was being rude but you where also rude to comment back. Just ignore.

I don't think OP was being rude to comment back. She was calm and measured. People like that don't get to dole out abuse without their rude behaviour being pointed out to them.

Drogosnextwife · 04/06/2019 15:55

No you weren't rude to comment back OP, she was just an arsehole. Ignore and move on, you were in the right. I wouldn't have been as nice as to call her rude when she was shouting at me in the street.

Uzicorn · 04/06/2019 15:58

@Sirzy

She was being rude but you where also rude to comment back. Just ignore.

FFS it's not rude to challenge an arsehole. Stop encouraging women to be cowards. I do wonder what your agenda is.

Sirzy · 04/06/2019 16:01

Especially outside a school it’s really never a wise idea to get into petty battles though. Just roll your eyes and ignore and if you want to avoid idiot parkers stick to parking further away!

SarahTancredi · 04/06/2019 16:05

This is precisely why no one should be allowed to park outside schools.

Brings out the entitled and the lazy. And it makes it unsafe for the poor buggers who need to walk to school.

She should have not been so rude and lazy and parked somewhere else. Or get a smaller car she can park. One of the two.

Littleduckeggblue · 04/06/2019 16:10

You said the space fits 3 cats so maybe you should have pulled forward instead of leaving a gap behind and a gap in front both being too small for a third car. I'm sure you wouldn't have been blocked in

Original poster
FanjoFizz · 04/06/2019 16:10

I really can't believe you would have been blocked in by her if you had pulled forward. You may have had to do a 20 point turn to get out, but you wouldn't have been unable to move out
Well considering she was touching the bumper of the car behind her, I wouldn’t have been able to get out.
Also it’s a very busy main road and cars drive very close to the parked cars to be able to fit. Doing a “20 point turn” just isn’t safe or feasible.

OP posts:
Original poster
FanjoFizz · 04/06/2019 16:12

You said the space fits 3 cats so maybe you should have pulled forward instead of leaving a gap behind and a gap in front both being too small for a third car. I'm sure you wouldn't have been blocked in
I said maybe 3 small cars. The other parked car was a big 4x4 and she was in a people carrier. No way was she going to fit.
As I pointed out earlier, you are expected to leave a gap between your parked car and the bollards. That’s literally the point of them.

OP posts:
Original poster
FanjoFizz · 04/06/2019 16:13

Although I like the idea of the space fitting 3 cats Grin

OP posts:
N2986 · 04/06/2019 16:13

Yanbu op. I once got a prime space outside school in between two dropped kerb driveways. A horrible Man then decided he wanted to park behind me and that I had to move up to give him room, but I would have subsequently blocked in someone's drive.

I refused and he screamed and swore at me through the window, clearly forgetting that we were both going to the same place! It wasnt at all uncomfortable standing near him in the playground Confused

HomeMadeMadness · 04/06/2019 16:14

I really can't believe you would have been blocked in by her if you had pulled forward. You may have had to do a 20 point turn to get out, but you wouldn't have been unable to move out

If you have to do a 20 point turn there isn't space. It really isn't OP's responsibility anyway. She could have just parked further away.

Original poster
FanjoFizz · 04/06/2019 16:15

@N2986 exactly! They forget they’re going to have to see you everyday too! I suspect the type of people who would shout at a stranger because they’re not getting their own way are unlikely to care though

OP posts:
butteryellow · 04/06/2019 16:21

She was bu.

School parking can be tricky. Blocking people in is not on neither is parking so it's dangerous for the kids. In the time she'd spent arguing and parking she could have parked further away and walked (which is what everyone does at my kids school when the peach spots have been taken)

CatG85 · 04/06/2019 16:22

YANBU at all.

poopypants · 04/06/2019 16:27

tenbob I really can't believe you would have been blocked in by her if you had pulled forward. You may have had to do a 20 point turn to get out, but you wouldn't have been unable to move out

What on earth are you basing your judgement on? Were you there? Why do people decide they know better even without being there? Just accept what the OP states as we have absolutely no reason to make up in our own heads that there is another reality than the one the OP is writing about. The OP says there is room for '2 cars, maybe 3 small ones' so why would you decide in your infinite wisdome that actually there was plenty of room for 3 vehicles of any size?

JustHereforHarriet · 04/06/2019 16:30

Totally with you OP. I always get in early to get a decent space where there’s yellow hatching and bastards still park in it and right behind.

CatOnASwing · 04/06/2019 16:30

I'd have pulled forwards OP, and let her park behind you. You might have had a job to get out, but the ability to wriggle out of a tiny space is (well, should be) part of a competent driver's skill set.

No excuse for her being so rude, but I think YWBU.