To think AIBU is U at times

[dandroo13]

Just that really ...
I know AIBU can be tough going at times but recently it seems to have really turned into somewhat of a battle ground. This weekend I read some particularly venomous threads! Some individuals clearly using it as platform to project anger and hatred. Offer constructive criticism by all means but I don’t think it’s acceptable for anyone to be subjected to name calling or bullying.
We are all adults here to support each other, offer advise, ask for advise and have a laugh aren't we ? ✌️

Yes, I noticed that it was 'pile on Saturday' last weekend.

Yes a lot of angry folk about Saturday

It’s a bear pit 🐻

AIBU is the bunfight topic. It's notorious for it.

Too many people post sensitive threads in here ("posting for traffic"), or treat it like Google ("help me choose which washing machine to buy" ) which would be much better off in the right topic where they'd get more helpful and more accurate advice. Often the advice on AIBU, especially RE legal, housing, medical issues etc is wildly inaccurate and sometimes dangerous.

MN really should put a big flashing warning on the start-a-thread page and direct posters to more appropriate forums.

I agree with all of the above but I have to confess that reading AIBU can be wildly entertaining.

It's a full mix.
There's threads that don't belong here, sensitive threads that don't really belong in AIBU and the usual 'AIBU? replies say yes. OP argues and flounces because people didn't agree with them'.

I suppose some people feel protected by the anonymity online and free to say whatever they like without consideration or consequences

@Jemima232 yes have to agree with you there . Some of the things I've read ! 🤭

I agree with all of the above too, things are often posted in the wrong place. The point I was making is that more recently I have read some seriously awful and unwarranted comments on here

which would be much better off in the right topic where they'd get more helpful and more accurate advice.

@Lockheart but the problem is those other topics hardly get any traffic. I'be posted on a few other ones and been lucky if i even get 5 responses, all the other threads often are quite short ones too! I agree that its not right to use AIBU for everything but what should posters do when they want a decent amount of replies?

@GreytExpectations it's a self-perpetuating problem - if people stopped using AIBU for everything then the other boards would get more traffic. MN needs to sign post the other boards more clearly and perhaps take AIBU out of hot topics so people stop just jumping in here. New posters especially might be upset by AIBU when they might have got a very different first impression of MN elsewhere.

Relationships gets a lot of traffic actually, but that doesn't stop people asking for relationship advice on AIBU (which is not as gentle or as knowledgeable).

If you want a decent amount of replies but don't want to post in the right forum then Chat might be more appropriate than AIBU as it's more of a catch-all.

Relationships gets a lot of traffic actually, but that doesn't stop people asking for relationship advice on AIBU (which is not as gentle or as knowledgeable).
Or at the very least consider what sort of issue it is before deciding.

Silly gripes in a relationship are probably ok in AIBU if you're willing to risk being told to LTB over some poorly paired socks because it's clearly a form of abuse by being incompetent.

But AIBU can be horrible so a hypothetical 'I think my DP is having an affair but I have no evidence. AIBU to demand he changes his job and spends every evening at home?' is probably going to get the more direct responses with a handful of rude and people cheering on a split from the sidelines declaring his guilt on AIBU. Whereas the same thread in relationships might still tell the OP they're probably overreacting but encourage the OP to explore their relationship more, what s changed etc.

I got told in the Feminism topic, y'know, totally supportive of women, that I have awful nails and aging hands!
I couldn't make it up!

@IHaveBrilloHair How disappointing !
Like I said , I think it's the anonymity. Regardless of what's posted where , it doesn't excuse online bullying.
I do love reading some of the AMA threads as people ask questions I'd never dare to ask !

@IHaveBrilloHair I wouldn't go near the feminism board with a barge pole! Those women have a very morphed idea of feminism.

Agree the other boards are too quiet. AIBU is a great resource of humour, comfort and support to me just now. Yes some people are nasty but I think ignoring them usually works. If someone posts a negative response to me I acknowledge it but don't get shirty because it's the price you pay for a lot of excellent positive advice.

I agree on the point re Feminism boards. A veritable echo chamber , a bit like Nero fiddling while Rome burns due to the contributors moaning about stuff while the supporters of trans people actually get on and do stuff to change the world and make things more equitable. Also, the way they try and do each other in terms of intelligence and long words is very entertaining.

• outdo not do

@dandroo13 What is AMA??

I think it's ask me anything

What is AMA??

Yes, its Ask Me Anything. Its a popular thing on Reddit