To wonder where all my money goes?

[Oohgossip]

Household income of around £75,000 in the midlands so around 4500 a month.

We don’t live like kings yet seem to live pay check to pay check.

Mortgage and associated bills of around 1500. 2 children, £300 a month childcare. We rent our cars and have one hol a year. Kids don’t want for anything but I haven’t spent a penny on myself in years.

Hands up, we don’t budget.

Where the hell does the money go?

I think Tesco takes all my money 😂

Any recommendations for apps etc to track things?

"I have absolutely NO IDEA where our money goes. It is so frustrating"

I find this hard to compute tbh. It's not a mystery where money goes.

Rosa, it is to me as we don’t seem to fritter on non-essentials.

When I look at bank statements it goes on food, bills, kids’ activities, kids shoes and car related issues. We need two cars for work and kids’ activities are expensive. The est just seems to disappear. I only buy new clothes when my old ones fall apart. Never buy new make up etc.

The problem with this thread is that the organised people aren't the ones with the issue.
Yes I know that if I noted every purchase down and kept a spreadsheet then it would all be clear. DH does keep one- but I gaily carry on spending on family stuff because we both work ft, earn a reasonable salary and we shouldn't have to 'scrimp'. I wouldn't spend £150 on a single thing without discussing it - but 10 lots of £15 without even blinking.

So it's proving easier to let the Monzo tech do the heavy lifting - its a joint account so we know who spent it. We both get the notification - comments of 'Rein it in Rockefeller' have been texted. When DH can see that actually his fuel costs are 3 x mine, and all the additional costs in Tesco Express were fruit for him - it's interesting.

Whatever works for you is the right answer

Do Tesco online

That way you concentrate on what you need and soon realise you buy 10 meals instead of 7

Have a week ‘out the freezer’ amazing what gets in there!

Over cook and freeze meals when one of you is out or fancies a quick dinner. I do this with curry lasagna Shepard’s pie etc

If you clothes shop online - add everything to the basket but don’t pay for it - go back the next day and I can guarantee you won’t know what’s in the basket and you’ll think ‘what do I need that for?’

Budget big expenses and keep looking at what you have and remind yourself what else needs to be paid for

Have a bills account and over pay in there and then separate spends for you and DH -

Include whatever in the bills so £20 petrol any extra comes from your own money

Same for shopping average out your spend - if it’s usually £100 a week and you spend £90 you have extra next week if you need the expensive stuff like cleaning or shampoo etc

I usually portion £50 spends for the kids - but this is need first, school shoes, coats jackets etc then wants and not always ‘fair’ DD needed shoes and trainers last month at £70 other DD started a new job and needed trousers and T-shirts.

People saying “you don’t need an app” and “keep your receipts”. Bloody hell is 2019. The technology is at your finger tips - use it! The OP specifically requested app recommendations!

Honestly, downloading a money management app is a great first step to understanding your spending habits. Once you download it and connect your bank accounts and credit cards it will go back a few months and analyse your spend for you. You can then add in budgets for different categories if you like. You don’t need to open a Monzo account or whatever - the technology exists now for all your bank accounts to feed into one place. Winner!

If it looks like Tesco, for example, is a large spend area then, yes, perhaps find other ways of controlling this spend such as online shopping. But you can also look at other categories and see where you can cut back.

As for people questioning whether the post is real because they can’t comprehend how someone can fritter away £4.5k as they are clearly “loaded” - come on. The OP isn’t moaning about being poor. People who have a lot of income are often habitual spenders because they haven’t needed to give it much thought in the past.

Good for you OP for trying to get a handle on this now. FWIW my DH and I have no DC and our net income after benefits and share schemes is £4k and I’m not proud to admit that until recently I couldn’t tell you where it all went. But I’ve become slightly obsessed with my money management app and it’s naturally started to change my habits. Good luck!

Is you need a budget the best app? I had a look at a few a while back and they all looked like a massive hassle, were expensive and seemed hugely time consuming. Does shine have an app that actually helps?

@Disorganised

Open Banking regs were brought in last year making all of this much more straightforward. There are loads of really good free apps out there which are very easy to use.

I’m using Money Dashboard but there are others too. Which recommend some here: www.which.co.uk/news/2019/01/5-budgeting-apps-to-help-you-save-money-in-2019/

Think about using Starling bank - you get a breakdown and see exactly where it goes. I swapped for our joint account and love them! (Not associated in anyway I promise, just a happy customer).

Thanks, I will take a look!

I'm quite interested in money, always shop around and have lots of accounts and credit cards to get the best deals and exploit loopholes.

But no way on this earth can I be arsed writing down every penny I spend and assigning it to a category. I have a rough spreadsheet of what money we have that I might spend half an hour looking at once a month and seeing how we're doing and if there's anything like insurance that needs sorting this month, but that's it.

YNAB in particularly appears to be very tortuous.

Another fan of YNAB here, it has been a game changer for us.

Having said that, the straightforward first step is to print out 1 months worth of bank transactions then work through them, item by item, assigning spends to simple categories like “groceries”, “car loan”, “ eating out” etc. That gives you a black-and-white snapshot of where your money is going. If you tend to spend cash,you’ll need receipts to work out where it has been spent: for this reason I avoid cash as much as possible these days.

I should add that we really needed to budget. I mean, I think we would do it anyway, but we spent ten years on one modest salary so that I could be a SAHM. It was doable but only because we tracked every penny. And it feels empowering. now that I’m working again and we have a bit more flexibility, I don’t want to just fritter it away, so we are trying to stick with the habits we learned before.

I love YNAB and find it incredibly easy to use once set up, wouldn't be without it now.

I love that you save in pots.

YNAB may not be the software for you.
I love it, but I use the older YNAB 4 & have been using YNAB for almost a decade but my version (which used to be sold for a one off payment) is no longer available.

You can do a 34 day free trial of the newest version if you want just to see what you think but it is now subscription software.

I don't know about the other apps but you can probably do free trials of them too.

Find the one that suits you don't try to make yourself suit the app or you won't keep using it.

On your income, I'd also be reading through some of Mr Money Moustache although I doubt you want to adopt most of his ideas & I think he has looked at budgeting apps in the past.
He looks at money in a completely different way.
Personally I skip his posts about cars & bicycles but there are a lot of really good posts about other things.

It doesn't really matter if you just make your own excel spreadsheet, use a notepad or pick an app, they all really do pretty much the same thing though which is make you see the unvarnished truth about what you are actually doing with your income.

It changes your attitude to the income & expenses you actually have.
Puts you in control of your finances rather than letting your finances control you.

Follow Dave Ramsey. It's life changing.

When you say ‘the kids don’t want for anything’, what exactly do you mean? Do they have lots of new clothes, toys, tech gadgets, days out, endless treats etc? That could really add up.
I was very frugal when DS was young, always had hand me down clothes, books borrowed from library, toys were just Christmas & birthday gifts from relatives, always had ‘free days out’ with picnics etc. There are loads of community events that can be accessed very cheaply ... yes we scrimped & saved but mortgage paid off in our early 40s & DS now in his late teens and seems perfectly happy despite all his second hand clothes (now budgets & buys his own from his part time job).

I do an awful lot mentioned here already (online Tesco shop yet still three other trips to supermarket seem to happen a week) but there are some really useful suggestions here so thanks everyone.

I’ll be honest, I don’t want to budget because I can’t be bothered with the faff - my life is, as lots of peoples are, very busy - but I will start soon because I want to save. I know I’m in a privileged position so should make the most of it.

I do spend a lot on the children but would feel less guilty about that if I curbed the frittering elsewhere I think.

Oh and I know my money doesn’t ‘magically disappear’, I’m fully aware we’re in control of deciding to spend 🙄😂

I wonder if the easiest way to track spending could include your phone camera? Take a snap of any things you spend on that don't come with a receipt? And tot at end of day?

Kids don't want for anything
They probably should, though. It's good for them to see that there are limits, to have to save up for things, to have to make choices, rather than have everything they want, to learn to wait for things they really want sometimes.

And yes, work out an actual budget. Give DH an allowance that he can do what he wants with, if he doesn't want to track his own spending (give yourself one too, obviously).

And you'll be a lot less busy once you stop going to Tesco three times a week. Make a meal plan and stick to it, do the online shop, and anything else goes on the list for next week's shop.

We have a bank account that sweeps anything over £2800 a month into savings the day after payday.

When I went on maternity leave (have never gone back) I got into the habit of searching round for insurance deals etc. I can save £1000 a year between insurances, energy direct debits, phone charges, wifi.

We never scrimp - DH earns 85,000+ - but we always save.

You need to make this a priority

There are some money saving threads and getting out of debt threads

I’ve saved £2000 since January - that bleak month!! Three teens - similar outgoings but not as much cash - 2 cars. We recently had floors done, new table and chairs and about to have doors fitted - all pod for not on loans

DH has saved more than me but I buy uniform and clothes/shoes for the kids - he pays for driving lessons.

They have to ask and wait for payday for wants not needs - they have pocket money and a budget (try don’t know this)

Mine all goes on bills. Housing, childcare, heating, transport, communications.

It comes in the bank, I pay for everything and then we have enough left cash for food

And I have done a spendings diary. We don't spend, it is just bills. We actually are pretty frugal day to day.

We buy things like clothing and bigger household items when we have a sudden windfall and fortunately we get a few of these a year! Maybe every 2 months. Work bonuses, kind relatives, side project income etc. This pays for the extras.

But our day to day income comes in and leaves in one swoop. It is uncanny how our day to day income matches our day to day outgoings.

Get a Monzo card. They track your spending and tell you what it's all on

Great thread. Off to look up Monzo