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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to cry with frustration that my neighbour won’t shut up

56 replies

ATrainSeat · 03/06/2019 00:55

We’ve had issues with him before but after a reasonable chat with my OH we thought we’d turned a corner. Evidently not. His front room is next to our bedroom and we’re currently experiencing Queens back catalogue and him and his friends singing. Occasional shouts. We’ve banged on the wall a couple of times and he shouted, ‘I’ll smash your fucking face in’ and ‘I’ll fucking kill you’ and ‘I’ll smash your fucking car in tomorrow’ so now at a loss. Tried to ring non-emergency police but no answer after half an hour on hold. Can imagine they’re busy tonight in the area we live in.

Not sure what to do and just feel like crying at the thought of our early alarms going off for work 😭

OP posts:
Original poster
ATrainSeat · 03/06/2019 07:11

SavoyCabbage that would absolutely be his mindset. Unbelievably he’s still going. This is the worst he’s ever been. I’ve managed a couple of hours sleep thanks to the fab suggestion of white noise on headphones. Sadly we can’t reorganise the house as the two main rooms both are next to him and we wouldn’t fit in the box room. Getting onto the police (re the threats), the council and the landlord today.

I just can’t get over how many times they’ve listened to the same Cher song?!

OP posts:
Marmablade · 03/06/2019 07:13

SavoyCabbage I take your point but if neighbour does it till 4am and OP does it from 6am then neighbour will be as inconvenienced as OP and see quite how annoying it is.

Roussette · 03/06/2019 07:14

If he's making threats, playing revenge music will just make him up his game, don't even think of doing that.

Whoever suggested 999, please NO. Do you have any idea how stretched the 999 service is and how many non-urgent phone calls they get? Millions every year, stopping genuine emergencies from getting through.

Speaking to the LL is the only way to go at the moment. The NDN will have terms in his Lease

DaisiesAreOurSilver · 03/06/2019 07:16

It's a police matter if he's made threats.

Complain to his landlord as well.

LarryGreysonsDoor · 03/06/2019 07:18

Now I see why you didn’t want to bother the police.
Still no excuse for being a twat.
I’d still contact environmental health and make a noise complaint if he has done it in the past.

Roussette · 03/06/2019 07:24

101 then. Not 999 FFS.

999 can connect you to ambulance, coastguard or Police when someone is actively in danger, a crime is being committed, or there is a danger to life.
Some drunk bloke shouting 'I'll kick your fucking face in' from his sofa in another house whilst listening to Cher is hardly an emergency.

Original poster
ATrainSeat · 03/06/2019 08:14

Don’t worry, I didn’t ring 999. 101 didn’t even answer so it was obviously a busy night. We’ll be ringing the police person that we’ve dealt with before though as whilst I don’t think he’d actually hurt us, he’s been aggressive before and I do worry for my poor car ha. And I also think whether he meant it or not, shouting repeated threats is not on. His party is still going btw guys!

OP posts:
pipanchew2 · 03/06/2019 08:19

Hi, we had a similar situation: we owned and they rented. Just be aware that if you get the police or the council involved when you sell you have to declare it to new buyers. We decided it was worth that risk as we weren’t planning on moving in the near future and it worked out for us. We got the noise nuisance team from the council involved and they came round took noise level recordings and agreed that it was unreasonable, issued warnings and starting going down an ASBO route. This put enough pressure on the neighbours for them to leave 🙂 and we now have a lovely calm family living next door.
We found the council we’re much more helpful than the police - I think noise comes under their remit rather than the police.

Manclife1 · 03/06/2019 08:26

By all means call the police but there’s no criminal offence of being loud nor is there an offence of shouting abuse from one house to another. I would call the council ASB team and see what they have to say.

Davespecifico · 03/06/2019 08:28

I would be tempted to sell up.

Davespecifico · 03/06/2019 08:28

The council can send a noise abatement person round to measure the decibels. I had it done once. They were very good.

HiItsClemFandango · 03/06/2019 08:33

Definitely contact his landlord, are you on good terms with the LL?

My downstairs neighbour plays really bassy thumping music every day that vibrates our walls and floor. He's quite a scary man and when I banged on the floor before he screamed " what the fuck are you fucking banging at I'll fuck you up " so now I just have to put up with it. It's horrible not being able to relax in your own home.

I hope it gets sorted for you soon.

louisvootin · 03/06/2019 08:36

PunishmentSnart how did you know she was from lpool? x

Original poster
ATrainSeat · 03/06/2019 08:37

We won’t be moving any time soon as I wouldn’t be accepted for another mortgage for at least 2/3 years so seems worth going down the council route/landlord. The landlord has already lost his ground floor tenant because of this guy so might be motivated to boot him out! Thanks all.

OP posts:
Original poster
ATrainSeat · 03/06/2019 08:38

louisvootin I’m assuming it’s because I said it was a busy night for police where I lived and we had the parade yesterday.

OP posts:
viques · 03/06/2019 08:43

I had a next door neighbour who used to have friends round for karaoke every Sunday afternoon! Not even at night but bloody irritating. I called the council noise people, they came round, sat on my sofa for half an hour then wrote the neighbour a letter saying if they carried on the council had the authority to remove and destroy their equipment.

Worked a treat. I would call the council, get them on side, they have secret powers!!!!

ShatnersWig · 03/06/2019 08:47

I own my flat, one above was a rental. Had a lovely quiet neighbour. Then some neighbours from hell moved in. Noise at all hours (usually starting up after midnight) whether loud music or him rowing with his girlfriend. She left and it all went quiet. Then they got back together. It all started up again. Got so bad one night I tried to sleep in my car on my drive but I could still hear it so moved the car round a street.

Next morning I managed to get hold of the landlord's address and phone number. I wrote a long letter detailing how appalling his tenants were and how it was affecting me. I told them that in future, now that I had their address and phone number, I would be ringing them up every single time there was stupidly loud noise at an unreasonable hour. And I meant it. Should they not answer the phone, I would come round at the same hour and back on their door and wake them up to see how they liked it. I hand delivered the letter that day so I know they received it. I was lucky, they only lived six miles away.

Next night, the landlord got woken up by me at 2 am.

Two nights later, the landlord got woken up my me at 3 am.

The next morning, the landlord's wife was on my doorstep apologising and telling me that they were kicking the tenant out and he was gone by the end of the week.

DerelictWreck · 03/06/2019 08:50

They were @£250 but they provide total silence when I need it.

You spent £250 on earbuds?!?! I buy the cheapy disposables from Amazon and can't hear a thing when they're in Grin Maybe try that OP? Not fair I know - it's his problem to change not yours but might help in the meantime.

BeautifulWintersMorning · 03/06/2019 09:17

Which ones do you use derelict?

regmover · 03/06/2019 09:27

Liverpool Council has the Landlord's Licencing Scheme, and one of the things it aims to do is to ensure that landlords deal with complaints about their tenants effectively. So you could contact the team that deal with that scheme. (And the landlord had better have a licence, they are very strict!).
liverpool.gov.uk/business/landlord-licensing/liverpools-landlord-licensing-scheme/benefits-of-the-scheme/

NauseousMum · 03/06/2019 09:33

Definitely keep reporting and speak to police and council. Log the threat to you and your car. Nightmare neighbours are awful.

The only thing is I'd worry about with noise cancelling headphones is not hearing if thd smoke alarm went off.

CoffeeToffeeFudge · 03/06/2019 10:53

Derelictwreck

I’m talking about electronic noise-cancelling Bose ear buds, not bits of plastic you poke in your ears Hmm

TreacherousPissFlap · 03/06/2019 11:11

That's not what I said larrygraysonsdoor, I said don't call 999 for it.

OP is safe indoors, the neighbour is in his house and is not threatening her now. This is not an emergency and nobody will thank her for tying up a 999 line.

If she reports on 101 it absolutely will be taken seriously, just not 999 seriously.

Mamamere · 03/06/2019 11:17

Coffee - which earbuds were they? I need some😬

SavoyCabbage · 03/06/2019 16:12

@Marmablade you think he will think about how he's inconvenienced other people because you are someone who is thinking in a normal, rational and nice way.

Some people don't think like this and things can escalate quickly and unpredictability as you can't imagine what they might do. People like this crash through their lives falling out with people, getting sacked from jobs etc. You aren't going to be able to reason with them and get them to think how you think.

My neighbour spat in my baby's face. He bought a dog especially so he could scream racist insults at our window whilst we were in our living room and then say he was calling the dog. He parked his car over our doorstep so we couldn't get out of our house and then set fire to it.