Nc'd but long time MNetter who left stbxh after seeing that he was an emotionally abusive cocklodger who was making me very ill. Thank you to everyone here for your support at the time.
As you'd expect he's proving very difficult to divorce, it's been dragging on and he takes every opportunity to be difficult. At one point I had to call the police, but I haven't had any trouble from him since.
I had a lot of therapy and after a year of constant panic attacks, being in a terrible state and not being able to drive because of the medications I was taking i'd finally come out at the other side and was managing better than ever.
A couple of weeks ago in some stupid twist of fate, I bumped into him. I felt like I was going to throw up. He started on at me playing dumb about why I left him, I told him what I thought of him (I cannot believe I had the guts to and I'm glad I did) and I walked off.
Unfortunately the anxiety has come flooding back like before. I hoped it would pass. I feel jittery and on edge. I'm so tired I can't wake up, I feel like I have flu and my vision is a bit blurry. If I didn't know better I'd say I had picked up a bug but I know I haven't. I really don't want a massive set back and to end up taking medication again and not be able to drive and feel like I've lost my freedom again.
Sorry I don't know exactly what I'm asking - for support? For anyone who has had a similar experience?
MN saved my life before, I couldn't have carried on with him and I'm so glad to be free, but I am so angry and upset that the anxiety has started again and all I want is to carry on living my life again.