Ex threatening court - AIBU?

[onceuponadaydream]

Hi all.

Just after a bit of advice please. I have two children aged 7 & 5. Ex has threatened to take me to court today after me stating that the weekends he sees the children (EOW, he collects Saturday AM, I pick up Sunday PM), need to change. I am not reducing any time, just changing the dates he is due to have them. They have school & club commitments that fall on 'his' weekends, and he refuses to take them. Switching the weekends around means these fall on my weekends so the children are still able to attend (I will take them) and his weekends are not impacted.

Apparently this means I am extremely unreasonable and he is taking me to court.

I should add that the Sat/Sun is the only time he sees them in a fortnight despite living 10 minutes away. He has no involvement in their day to day lives and doesn't even speak to them by phone in between contact. He has never attended any school event (parents evening, nativity, sports day), or any extra curricular activities. I left him in 2015 due to emotional and financial abuse when the children were 3 & 1, and have had sole care since that point.

What could I expect in court?

Thanks.

So instead of him having them weekend 1 and 3 he will have them weekend 2 and 4?

If so tell him the courts will laugh at him and tell him not to be so pathetic! Though I’d be amazed if it got that far.

@AFOLNerd Exactly that. In fact, he would even get an extra weekend to make the weekends switch i.e. weekend 1, 2, 4, 6 etc. I don't think I am being unreasonable but I endured 10 years of emotional abuse from this man, so my judgement may be clouded.

I wouldn’t expect that to get to court, unless you frequently change weekends his solicitor will tell him to get a grip.
I would suggest keeping a record of everything- send emails “dear exh, just to confirm that I’d like to swap weekends so that the children can go to xxx and xxx, they are really keen to do this and whilst I appreciate it may be inconvenient for you to change dates as you aren’t able to take them along, this is the best solution I can find. If you can suggest a better alternative do let me know. Best.....”
be polite, keep it civil

@Craftylittlething it's not a frequent thing at all. I work the weekends around events such as Father's Day, his birthday etc where I would expect him want to see the children, so there has always been an element of flex. I have never been anything but civil, and I'm doing it for the children's benefit, not mine 🤷‍♀️

I know, I didn’t think for a minute you were being difficult. Just if he’s one of these ones that threatens court every time you make a suggestion, that if you put everything in writing, he looks like an arse. Just suggesting you keep evidence just in case you should need it. Best of luck