To worry I'm going to ruin Christmas for DC1?

[loie]

I'm pregnant with DC2. DC1 will be a few weeks off 3 when I'm due (27.12).

I feel really guilty in general that I'm having a second - I'm not sure if that's normal or not, but I'm so panicked about the adjustment for him, and now - adding to that panic - I'm worried I'll be in labour/in hospital over Christmas.
I know at his age it doesn't particularly matter whether you celebrate a few days later or whatever but I don't think I'd be able to shake the guilt!!!

Do I need to just get over this?

Just remember to have lots of sex about two weeks before Christmas and cross your legs tight during it, if it comes to that.

Involve your DS long before hand. When he writes his letter to Santa, include a note that the new arrival is due around Christmas Day and ask him if he could come a day or two earlier or later. Tell your DS that Santa and the elves make special arrangements if they can't come on the day itself. A 3 year old won't be too aware of the exact date anyway - at that age, it depends on how much the parents and relatives wind them up for Xmas. Play it all cool, ensure DS gets his presents/party etc - he won't care whether it's on the day itself.

My DS was born on the 22nd and I took him home on Christmas Eve. DD was 3 and she ran around telling the neighbours that she got a baby for Christmas. I'd been so worried that she'd be upset, jealous etc and nothing bad happened at all. I'd suggest that you just take it day by day - and at 3 they don't really know what day it is, so Christmas can be on whatever day you decided.

I had a baby a few days before Christmas but due to complications was still in on Christmas Day. My children were 2 and 3 and don't even remember now as it was such a non event to them. The baby was way more exciting. It will be fine OP

I wouldn’t stress out about this. My DS was born 2 days before Christmas .My then 3 yr old DD was more exited about having a new baby brother than Christmas and Santa ,so much so that she wanted to call him Baby Jesus(we never).We came home on Christmas Eve in the snow.Christmas morning was bedlam with grandparents and the midwife all arriving at the same time ,but we coped and never felt DD missed out on anything.She actually talked more about the present her new brother had brought for her than anything Santa had left.

Dc1 was 3 when i was due with dc2. Due date 22nd but came 29th. We chilled out st home xmas day and xmas day dc1 woke with a random fever and was feverish throughout the day. He wanted to go to bed (but still eat Xmas Dinner) and he wanted it with me. So just me and him ate xmas dinner in my bed (i welcomed this as shattered anyway) whilst dh entertained the in laws. In a weird way, it was lovely. Dc1 and i just snuggled in bed with dinner and books most of the afternoon.
I always knew dc2 would be late.i could just tell

Dc1 doesn't remember xmas at 3yo now. But he does remember the toys. Honestly, don't worry. Things will work out.. Enjoy the last few days with 1 child xx

my mum was in hospital over Christmas when i was 6, she had an emergency section and delivered my brother on Christmas eve.

We all still talk fondly of the year we had beef burgers for Christmas dinner.

Try not to stress about it. you might even go over due. no point in worrying about things that may or may not even happen.

Congratulations on DC2

It'll be fine. Time and energy are not infinite, unfortunately, but love certainly is. It's good to learn how to share with a sibling. DS1 at a similar age enjoyed helping with looking after his little brothers, and it was great practice for when he grew up and had children of his own!

I prefer the suggestion by a pp that you tell him you're having an early Christmas, rather than just pretend it's Christmas when it isn't. DGS for one would most certainly have known - he's been very hot on dates, schedules etc since he was old enough not to eat the calendar. And you'd have to get everyone you know in on it, and not turn on the telly for about a week...

you're worrying too much.

my brother was born on halloween.

apparently my 5 year old brother and i (2) turned up and asked where our halloween costumes were.
my mum remembers this and goes on about it still.
bothered her, we'd forgot and find it funny now.

he's too young to know, won't remember it.

stop feeling guilty.
having siblings is wonderful. x

Please don't worry or feel guilty about something that is way out of your control. He's so young and will be distracted by so much other stuff that time of year. What other family does he have? (Close grandparents, father, aunties and uncles?)

I had our dd on her dad's birthday, 5 years later it'll be exactly one week when dd2 is due. You should feel guilty on your purse strings! Christmas presents and 2 bdays!

@Becathourus I think that's where most of my guilt comes from - we have pretty limited family!

Ah! I do apologise. But seriously don't think to much about it, you're being too hard on yourself!

I used to wish for a little brother or sister for Christmas when I was that age. I was in nursery and I remember clearly 3 friends having new siblings and I was desperate for one too! Never happened thankfully- my parents relationship was toxic!!

Never any way of knowing but babies almost never turn up on their due date and I think the vast majority of women go overdue. You may not give birth until January.

I wouldn’t fret too much although it is completely normal to worry about the impact of a second child on the first. I’m sure your DS will have a great Christmas and will love his new sibling .

Christmas is still pretty overwhelming for 3yos. Plan to spread it out over several days and that way, even if you're giving birth during that time, you've got lots of flexibility about what you do when. And definitely include the new baby as one of the exciting things. He'll love it.

You absolutely do need to just accept it, because no matter how anxious you get it isn't going to change.

DS2 was due on Christmas Day. We'd got everything ready, had a chilled Christmas at home and had pretty much planned every possible outcome of "what happens if I go into labour at 6am Christmas Day". Instead of stressing I just got everything sorted in November and spent all of Christmas relaxing on the sofa.

Ultimately, if you're in hospital over Christmas, Christmas will still happen. You can get gifts and decorations and cards prepped nice and early, get his gifts wrapped and ready in the loft so your DH/DP can lay them out like any other Christmas and he'll always remember the madness of it all.

My 2nd was born on 23rd. Get excited! You are about to give him the best Christmas present EVER!

I think that's where most of my guilt comes from - we have pretty limited family

Don't worry - I'm one of the PP above , had DC2 a few days before Christmas. My DH was in the Army and we had exactly no relatives nearby at all. Most of our neighbours were away too, since Army families to back to their relatives if they can at Christmas. So DD was home with just her Daddy and the cat. DD still had a great Christmas and got a baby brother as well ! Don't worry, your DC is only 3 and anything that happens at Christmas will be wonderful.