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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not return their balls?

26 replies

Shadowboy · 29/05/2019 14:08

We have an Upside down L shaped garden, and at the bottom to the left of the ‘L’ is our glass green house. It’s a beautiful Victorian style one. About a month ago the neighbours lad managed to smash one of the glass panels when he kicked a ball into the garden. We saw the lad do it and asked him to tell his dad to pop round to collect the ball and discuss the broken glass. The green house is not near their garden - it was a hefty kick over!

No one collected the ball. We paid £20 to replace the glass and carried on as normal. Yesterday it happened again - this time we didn’t see it but the ball is in the greenhouse. I’m not giving the balls back ( I’ll let the dog torture them) if their child can’t be careful and keeps smashing our greenhouse then their loss.

I’d like to add that we have kids and in the 5 years we’ve had the kids they have never damaged the greenhouse - partly because it’s fenced behind a 4ft picket fence.
AIBU to keep any balls that come over our 6ft dividing fence whether they break anything or not until they learn to be more careful?

OP posts:
CurtainsOpen · 29/05/2019 14:12

Just leave 'em until they come knocking, then discuss the damage.

Tough tits to them.

Seaandsand83 · 29/05/2019 14:13

Not unreasonable at all!! How incredibly annoying OP!

InTheHeatofLisbon · 29/05/2019 14:14

Usually I'd say chuck them back, but the fact they've twice caused damage and haven't knocked on the door (parents) to arrange paying for the damage and apologising (which would be the first thing I'd do!) says a lot.

I'd happily hand them over to your dog!

AbbyHammond · 29/05/2019 14:15

Why don't you go and speak to your neighbour rather than being passive aggressive?

InTheHeatofLisbon · 29/05/2019 14:17

Why don't you go and speak to your neighbour

Isn't that the job of the parents who aren't preventing the damage? Or paying for it?

seven201 · 29/05/2019 14:17

The child may well not have told their parents. Go and tell them you've had two panes broken now and it needs to stop.

AbbyHammond · 29/05/2019 14:19

Isn't that the job of the parents who aren't preventing the damage? Or paying for it?
Do the parents even know?

Walkamileinmyshoesbeforeujudge · 29/05/2019 14:20

Buy a cheap foam ball and hand that back? Cfers using your property as a goal!
Send them the receipt for the glass before giving the ball back.

Amber0685 · 29/05/2019 14:22

What if the boy didn't tell his parents?

InTheHeatofLisbon · 29/05/2019 14:22

Do the parents even know?

I'm fairly sure I'd hear glass breaking if my child was in the garden. Wouldn't you? I'd also wonder where two footballs had gone, they're not cheap!

AbbyHammond · 29/05/2019 14:24

OP says the greenhouse is not near the neighbours garden.

I have no idea how many balls my children have or where they are Confused

Thesearmsofmine · 29/05/2019 14:27

I would go and speak to the parents, as others have said they might not know?

InTheHeatofLisbon · 29/05/2019 14:27

I have no idea how many balls my children have or where they are

Hope you're not OPs NDN Grin

I do, because we paid a lot for them and my children have been told that if it goes over a fence (we back onto the next street so 5 gardens in total) to come and tell one of us so we can get it back and apologise for the inconvenience. To be fair it doesn't happen often, and we get balls over the fence from other gardens too.

ChardonnaysPrettySister · 29/05/2019 14:29

I would go round, tell the parents about the damage but I won’t bring the ball back.

They only will get it if they pay for the glass replacement.

Cheeserton · 29/05/2019 14:35

Clearly, knock on the door and discuss it??

Original poster
Shadowboy · 29/05/2019 14:36

The greenhouse is tucked away in the corner of the L - you’d be able to see the greenhouse from their windows but it’s not near the boundary.
The lad at a guess is 7/8. I told him to tell his dad to come and collect the ball when he put his head over the fence to look at what had happened. Dad was definitely home when the first one got smashed as I’d heard him in the garden talking a little while before it happened. The second time we were out- I found a ball when I went to water the Greenhouse.

I haven’t been round as I’d have to drag my kids with me (they are too little to leave alone as the way the streets work out it’s quite a walk down the road and round the corner to their house. By the time my OH is home (he works in London 4 days a week) I feel it’s a bit late so I never bothered.

I’m hoping losing some balls might make the child more careful. Plus the dog will enjoy them!!

OP posts:
PettyContractor · 29/05/2019 14:39

I'd also wonder where two footballs had gone, they're not cheap!

£4 in Tesco.

timeisnotaline · 29/05/2019 14:46

I’d also wonder if the parents had any idea. I can easily see me not having a clue Blush. And I know balls aren’t cheap but that doesn’t mean I know where they are!

LakieLady · 29/05/2019 15:31

I'd go and speak to the parents, OP. The boy may haver been too scared to mention it and they might not know.

Bloody annoying, I'd be hopping.

Justaboy · 29/05/2019 19:41

Polycarbonate sheeting and glazing isnt that expensive these days, they make roit sheilds out of it;!

StoneofDestiny · 29/05/2019 19:51

You need to talk to the parents - their kids are causing costly damage. They are responsible.

churchthecat · 29/05/2019 20:11

I'd put a note through their door saying they have now smashed your greenhouse twice, and the bill will follow shortly. With photos of the ball in the smashed greenhouse.

Timide · 30/05/2019 06:13

Are you serious? Are you an adult or what? "I will let the dog to tear it apart" what a revenge to a 7 year old! Go and speak to the adults like an adult!

Banhaha · 30/05/2019 06:20

Sounds to me like the 7 year old didn't tell his parents. I think you'll have to pop round if you want to get it resolved. Or stick your head over the fence next time you hear them out in their garden.

Sallyseagull · 30/05/2019 07:29

I'd put money on the parents not knowing.

Go round and discuss it with the parents directly.