Aibu to expect little more?

[Hollyrose79]

My ex husband and I split up over 2 and a half years ago. This week he has taken our girls away for a week. This is the first time they have been away from me for so long. I am obviously seriously struggling and missing them more than words can say. My eldest has a phone and when she is home I make sure she phones her dad every night. They went on holiday Saturday morning and the only contact I have had is phone call Monday night, neither of them sounded particularly happy, my youngest especially got a little upset and said she missed me and got bit choked up. The only reason I got this phone call is because I text my ex and asked if the girls could call me that night. I get that it's his time with them but surely a good morning text and good night phone call isn't too much too expect, should I really have to keep asking? Or am I bu? Like I said I know I am possibly being selfish but i miss them so much. They re 8 and 6. My 6 year old also has kiddiconnect phone that she usually texts me on when she is at his overnight or if I am working but nothing from this phone. My eldest usually sends me silly texts when we are apart.
I am lost :( x

But if phoning is going to disrupt and upset them then is it the best for them?

They are on holiday and as hard as it is for you you need to let them enjoy the holiday. Maybe ask your ex to send over a few photos each day instead?

Sorry but your post seems to read as if your main concern is you, how much you’re missing them.
The priority should be them and I suspect ringing / texting you each day isn’t in their best interests or else they’d be doing it.
Remember you don’t own your children, it’s our jobs to guide them in this world and how lucky they are that they have a father who wants to take them on holiday x

You poor thing OP it sounds tough. I imagine it's a bit different because they're on holiday and also it sounds like the phone call may break up their flow and makes them homesick. It might be better for the girls not to be thinking so much of home and just getting involved in the holiday. Can't be many more days until they're home. I'd focus you're energy on choosing a lovely welcome home meal and movie night or something for when they get back.

I found the best thing for my children when they were with dad, was to not communicate with them, my youngest especially if she heard nothing from me she was fine

Thank you for your replies. I admitted to being a little selfish and yes hearing them upset was hard. I am just used to at least a good night text at bedtime. When we were away on holiday I would make sure she sent him a few pictures every night, I had just hoped I would get the same treatment. There is a bit of a back story where he thought my eldest was texting me too much, she would wake in the morning and send me some lovely messages, he didn't like it so he started taking her phone away. I know I just need to pull my big girl pants up and get on with it and look forward to having them home and a good day that I have planned for Sunday.

If it's going to upset them when they hear you, then I wouldn't contact them. If I go away with DH for a weekend, I cant phone my DS9. He turns into a blubbering mess and not fair on my DM who usually take him for me. Hes always fine, in great mood, enjoying himself with his cousins till he hears me. I will text the 2 teenagers just to find out how things are going.

I know it's not the same thing but when my two were younger and went away on residentials with school the school's advice was for them NOT to phone home as it made home sickness worse. I hope the time flies to Sat and you have a lovely day together.

You are all right, it's the first time I have had to deal with this so thank you. Will just continue to count down the days til they are home.x

My eldest has a phone and when she is home I make sure she phones her dad every night

Stop doing this. If he doesn't and won't do the same back.