Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU - re: Linkedin messaging for dating purposes

32 replies

Nenuco · 28/05/2019 21:30

My friend was in a flight and he saw a flight attendant which he found pretty. He looked for her online and only found her LinkedIn profile.

He's asking me if he should message her on LinkedIn. I told him just do whatever you want.

What is your take on this - would you find it creepy if some random guy (well someone you've assisted in a flight) messages you on LinkedIn?

AIBU to be a bit pissed thinking this is too childish? What would you advise?

My friend is 42, divorced. He's nerdy and has no game. For context.

OP posts:
Lovethetimeyouhave · 28/05/2019 21:32

I say no. I am on LinkedIn and I use it for work. It is so annoying having men messaging looking for other things that aren't work...

Queenoftheashes · 28/05/2019 21:32

Extremely creepy yes. LinkedIn is not a dating website and women regularly complain about being tracked down on there by pervy men.

BuffaloCauliflower · 28/05/2019 21:32

I would find this weird and creepy and I think most women would too. She was working, it’s not even like they met in a bar and hit it off, and now he’s tracked her down via her work as it’s LinkedIn. Did she even give him any indication she was interested or is he going purely on her looks? I’d be telling him a firm no.

Shoxfordian · 28/05/2019 21:33

No he shouldn't
Did she even seem like she fancied him or was she being basically polite because it's her job?

managedmis · 28/05/2019 21:35

Ugh

How does he know her name?

Original poster
Nenuco · 28/05/2019 21:35

Did she even seem like she fancied him or was she being basically polite because it's her job?

Hard to tell. I'd say she was basically doing her job. He's in business class.

OP posts:
AnchorDownDeepBreath · 28/05/2019 21:36

No, not only is it very creepy, he's likely to get screenshot and shared over LinkedIn publicly. The culture there is trying hard to stamp this out.

It's a professional platform, not a dating site, under any circumstances.

Original poster
Nenuco · 28/05/2019 21:36

How does he know her name?

They probably had name tags. Not sure.

OP posts:
FenellaVelour · 28/05/2019 21:37

Super creepy.

TemporaryPermanent · 28/05/2019 21:37

Personally I wouldn't mind. But he shouldn't expect too much - I once found a message on linked in that I hadn't noticed for two years...

TigerDroveAgain · 28/05/2019 21:38

Totally creepy. There was a huge furore a few years ago about this, he doesn’t need to be that guy

Shoxfordian · 28/05/2019 21:41

Yeah it's creepy
Tell him not to be that guy

daisychain01 · 28/05/2019 21:43

Totally inappropriate. Women shouldn't be open season when they are doing their job for men to stalk them on social media especially as they hadn't given their permission.

And cabin crew do not wear "labels" with their name on to enable this type of behaviour.

Mummyshark2019 · 28/05/2019 21:43

Stalker alert!!

SoHotADragonRetired · 28/05/2019 21:45

No no no no no. LinkedIn is a site for business connections, end of. If you only know a person's LinkedIn contact details you should not be hitting on them.

It's also creepy as fuck to hit on customer services staff who have to be nice to you for their jobs. He should leave the poor woman alone.

User8888888 · 28/05/2019 21:50

I’ve had it once and found it super creepy. As others have said, you expect LinkedIn to be a professional portal. I ignored and deleted but it just felt a bit wierd.

Horsemenoftheaclopalypse · 28/05/2019 21:51

I’m a hard no.

Totally inappropriate - The poor woman was just doing her job

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 28/05/2019 21:54

Aghhhhh no. Don't do it.

pokepoke · 28/05/2019 21:55

Really creepy. Did he end up messaging her??

Original poster
Nenuco · 28/05/2019 21:58

Really creepy. Did he end up messaging her??

Dunno. I told him it's super creepy. But truthfully got so exasperated then told him I'm tired of this childish shit.

OP posts:
justilou1 · 28/05/2019 22:34

Absolutely not... it’s called stalking. LinkedIn is for professional progression. Bumble & POF are for dating purposes.

Anythingbutfootball · 28/05/2019 22:35

#linkedinisnottinder

Doobigetta · 28/05/2019 22:37

I regularly use the “I don’t know this person” button, and I never need to do so for a woman.

VimFuego101 · 28/05/2019 22:46

Can you even connect to someone who you don't have anyone in common with? Regardless, it's creepy.

donquixotedelamancha · 28/05/2019 22:47

I think tracking down someone you met in a customer service role is creepy whatever website is used.