Firstly OP, I have to congratulate you on the thread title. It’s got everything. Parking, conflict, drama, the lot. I have really enjoyed reading it, especially the anecdotes about people’s arsey parking behaviour.
I’m a contractor and I work all over, so if parking were longevity-based anywhere I’ve worked, I’d be right at the bottom of the pile.
I only drive where there is no reasonable public transport alternative. Usually on the godforsaken business parks that councils keep giving permission for. Why?
On these business parks, the councils have usually decided that there should be insufficient parking in order to encourage use of the non-existent public transport or car sharing. Which isn’t much help when you don’t live anywhere near colleagues.
Anyway, I digress. It’s usually first come first served where I’ve worked. It’s useful for your employer, isn’t it? Everyone who can come in early, does so in order to get a parking space. Although I have seen people sitting in their cars for 40 minutes before entering the office in order to save their spaces. Barmy. It’s no fun for people who have to drop kids off and can’t arrive 40 minutes early.
The directors always made sure they got their own spaces, though. They were convinced that they would be taxed on an allocated space (not Scotland), despite being assured otherwise by finance professionals (me) so they earmarked unmarked spaces and kicked off when anybody unaware of the secret parking code parked in one of them.
In one place, they had marked spaces in between rows of cars, blocking in those cars. The people parking in the in- between spaces, perpendicular to the rows of cars, were supposed to be out of them by 5 pm in order not to block others in. Unsurprisingly, the occupiers didn’t always bother vacating their spaces promptly, leaving colleagues who had to go to collect children etc. having to wander around the building asking who was in the black Fiesta etc etc., while the nursery late fees racked up.
I once worked somewhere (public sector) where they had a complex rota: people with mobility problems always got a space, everyone else got a go for some days depending on working pattern. Sounds ok but sorting it out took 50% of somebody’s time: not just doing the rota but fending off complaints and moans and reallocating spaces when people were out of the office. Not many employers would be keen on that!
The answer, of course, is for businesses to set up in places properly served by public transport: town and city centres. No hope of that when inaccessible except by car out of town space is cheap, though. I assume they think that the employees can just fly in on their magic carpets.