To think there are too many pearl clutches around here nowadays.

[KindleAndCake]

I've been here a long time now, under various names. I dont come on here as much as I used to, but there was a time where we would have laugh, be kind and courteous to each other and let the big things slide. Now you cant even hint at something being light hearted without some miserable fucker jumping on you with their judgements and clutching their pearls.

It just ain't the same anymore

Shit, forgot to add lighthearted in the title

YANBU-There has been a change in tone. I think that the need to explicitly state that things are light-hearted says it all really.

There is also a really weird double-standard, whereby lots of people seem to bend over backwards to scream that the OP is 'judgemental' and then judge them for that unforgiveable crime, almost screaming "burn the witch" because a poster dared to be concerned about a child.

Have been here under since 2010 - deregged after Jeffrey-gate and still do periodically. I do miss my 'view 1000' post feature and wish they'd bring it back!

It has changed. When I first joined you'd be handed your arse if you were being a dick, but people were generally good humoured. Over time there seems to have been an increase in posters competing to be the most 'honest' which results in a huge pile-on where it descends into nasty name calling and I feel sorry for your children type posts.
People also don't seem to bother reading the full threads anymore.

There are still good things about it - and some things have got better. Much more understanding around SEN and disablist language, really through provoking content in FWR, the Woolly Hugs team... But I do miss the old days a bit where people seemed to be a bit more lighthearted and were less quick to jump in and call someone a cunt.

MN has a reputation for being “middle class pearl-clutching feminists with too much time on their hands”, but I think more recently there seem a lot of quite bitter, disaffected individuals in here. Any thread about a husband, people pile on to project about their ex, as if they can presume to tell the OP how she should approach her whole life on the basis of a couple of posts. People get very bitter if anyone seems to have a good marriage or lifestyle / income. The usual spiteful anti-SAHM brigade will always pile in to tell any SAHM she is vulnerable / under/stimulated / in the 1950s etc. It gets very boring actually and it’s not representative of real life either.

Oh and I really miss Morningpost and her talk roundup, which was so funny.

That and UnquietDad's impressions of Cheryl Cole on the old X Factor threads in Telly Addicts.

There’s so much nastiness. I often think ‘would they have said that to me if this was a face to face conversation?’ and more often than not I think the answer is no.

I think there are a lot of high earners & what used to be regarded as upper class posters on here

Or that's what they would like you to believe. You can be anyone you want on here and have a whole new fantasy life, complete with huge untruths and embellishments.

Aah, the talk round up. Happy days!

“I think there are a lot of high earners & what used to be regarded as upper class posters on here”

You see, I think it’s the opposite. If you live in certain parts of London, for instance, or have a certain lifestyle you are accused of being a troll. You can’t describe details of your life because people get really nasty and accuse you of making it up when, in your context, it’s really nothing out of the ordinary at all.

This isn't about the term pearl cluthers though.

Look at the homes section, some of the kitchens I've seen on there would fit my flat in them & when you see that posters have homes worth nearly a million pounds, there are so many people that feel lucky just to have a roof over their heads.

Yes, society become more intolerant, and its reflected in Mumsnet, the sanctimonious and competitive MeToo brigade.

To quote James Bartholomew, we now have a culture which "imposes guilt and encourages anger".

MN is full of the "politics of outrage".

Anybody doubting this in any way should read the recent thread about the poster with four children asking if she should consider having a fifth.

Among the discussions about sharing attention and bedrooms, effect on existing children, stretching finances and energy reserves etc, which I suspect is the relatively mundane sort of thing the OP had been pondering when asking for opinions and perspectives, it didn't take very long at all for somebody to start frothing and hurling abuse at her for wanting to single-handedly destroy the planet in one great big population-explosion timebomb apocalypse - and then it became a complete pile-on.

In fact, before very long, any rare posters asking something practical and constructive like "Would you fit everybody and their luggage in one car to go on holiday?" looked so out of place and ostensibly on the wrong thread!

Sorry, couldn't resist....

SausageRoll there's a thread I'm on about someone debating a third but with a large age gap at 41. It's been relatively polite with only a couple of comments about the environment, I'm waiting for it to go down that route.

Webuilt that's exactly the threads I'm on about!

faux-ffended Brilliant.

I do think it's the Internet in general, not just Mumsnet. I've been using online forums since... 2002? There were jerks back then, too. But posters weren't as concerned with anonymity (I think I used my real name as a username on more than one!) and behaved mostly like their real-life selves.

The anonymity we hide behind now seems to encourage exaggerated behaviours we'd never get away with IRL.

I've been here for a while under various names, in fact I've only just name changed to this one, and my rule is, I only write what I'd say to someone's face. So many people hide behind their handle, and seem to think they're being devastatingly clever by putting an OP down, when, in fact, they're showing their arse.
I like the hand hold threads, and the ones where an OP is going through some shit, and the MN collective rallies round to support them, but I think the known trolls spoil it for everyone. I give any post vaguely linked to the subjects the trolls are known to speak about a wide berth.

I used to post, particularly about emotive issues and get upset when I got torn to pieces. Then I realised that often these kinds of posts attracted posters who enjoyed tearing people to shreds particularly if they were already going through a hard time. In particular when I was treated abusively by a female friend and told it was my fault.

So I learned not to post about those kinds of things any more, I stick to neutral or practical topics now.