To go to New York for five days without my husband and kids?

[50shadesofknackered]

Just that really!
I've finally got round to booking to go to New York with my mum, for five days later this year.
I feel guilty about the kids not going but honestly, they are 11 and 8 so they would get tired and fed up. They will be at home with their dad. (We are also having a family holiday in August to Greece.) Selfishly, I'm really looking forward to going and doing my own thing for a few days. I've managed to get a handle on the guilt (kind of) and I'm really looking forward to it. However, I was just chatting with a colleague about holidays and I mentioned that I am going to New York and she said she doesn't understand why I would go away without my husband and kids! I know this shouldn't bother me but it does and now I feel guilty all over again! Surely, this isn't such an usual thing? I'm not leaving them with a random off the street, they will be at home with their dad. My husband has absolutely no issue with me going by the way and encouraged me to book it, saying I was crazy to be feeling guilty. So AIBU? Surely this happens all the time! I'm pretty sure that this woman wouldn't have said this to my husband if it was the other way around, which pisses me off even more! I wish I'd never mentioned it now! Has anyone else done this and did you get the same kind of comments?

I went with DM and MIL - we had an amazing time. Enjoy yourself!

Oh FFS I hate those sanctimonious bores that think you can't have any independence, the same bores that cry "I just couldn't enjoy it without them, I'd miss them too much" (I've not read any replies in case I've accidentally passively aggressively addressed someone's post there 😀) DH and I go away without the kids, it's bloody brilliant, as are our family holidays. I too am thinking about going to NY with my mum. Don't waste your time feeling guilty because that's how you think you should feel, I gave that crap up years ago and feel free for it.

Sounds amazing. Your colleague is just jealous.

I’m going with my DH and DD10 for 5 days. I hope she won’t be bored!

The only thing that would stop me going alone is, I’d spend my whole time thinking “oh, she would love this”

But that’s my issue. I wouldn’t presume anyone else should feel that way. Enjoy your trip.

God no I would jump at the chance. I never understand why some people feel the need to constantly be with their partner and kids it would drive me crazy never having anything to myself.

My parents used to go skiing with out us, the mams went one year and the fathers the next. Not until the "Boom" times did the kids get brought. My mam also did New York with her parents and sister.

It has no effected me negatively (except maybe my obsession with going on holidays)

Do not be guilty you work hard enough to be able to enjoy holidays. Don't mind your colleague they are most likely jealous because they couldn't do it!!

Yanbu, I love going away without DH and DC. Mine are 7 and 5 and have done so for the last 3 years, usually a long weekend.

I go away for a long weekend with my mum every year (have done for the past 5 years or so). It’s fabulous. DH doesn’t mind (he goes away another time doing his thing) and he’s more than capable of looking after HIS children! I had one friend who would find it odd, but actually that said more about her than me (she didn’t think her DH would manage without her). I would love to go to NY - you should definitely go!

Go and have fun.
I went to NYC when dd was 8 months old.
Never even phoned home

I think your colleague is green with envy by the sounds of it!.You simply MUST go ,and have a guilt free holiday with Mum.(DS went there on School Trip when younger, had a great time )going again with GF ) .You have a family holiday booked as well just go for it!

I’ve been To New York twice , Spain 6 times and Dublin all without my husband and kids. 5 days tops with friends. We have a disabled older son and we can’t go away together at all. I never ever feel guilty. Always have a lovely time and come back recharged. I’ve also had loads of weekends away. I\YANBU.

Spend some quality time with your mother, she's family too. Mine is gone and I would love the opportunity to have some fun with her. You will also be modelling a close extended family to your children, so that when they are adults they may follow suit and have time away with you or their dad. Also, time alone with Dad can be good for them too.

Go and have a ball!. Slightly off topic but book a attraction pass before you go. Depending on what you plan to do it will save you a fortune

Can I come???

Go and have a fab time . Ignore anyone who tries to make you feel guilty .

Mother and child going to NYC together - lovely
Father and children staying at home and presumably having a nice time together- also lovely

Thank you all. I'm going to stop being ridiculous and ignore what she said. I'm really looking forward to it and thanks for the tip about passes.

Your colleague sounds jealous and a little bit boring.

I fly Thursday including New York stay, kids and dh staying home. They will be fine. We have family holiday in August booked.

I go away annually with a friend and we have a fucking ball!

It is possible that, in that time, DH and DC consume their annual supply of fast food, but I don't care; I don't even ask!

Do not feel guilty one jot, OP

One of my best friends and I went away, just us, for a week. Her twins were 2 at the time. She felt no guilt

DH and I both have at least one trip away without each other every year (albeit no DC). I think It's healthy.