Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my DP is a 13yo trapped in an adults body?

23 replies

fuckplaystations · 25/05/2019 22:56

I don't think I'm in the wrong, but think I may have overreacted.
Haven't seen DP in two weeks. Recent things going on in my family have meant I've had to move back home with my DM. DP and I didn't technically live together, we had our own seperate places but saw each other on average maybe 5 days out of 7. Since I've moved back in with my mum it's just been weekends because of the distance, but because he was away for a friend's birthday last weekend, it's been two weeks apart. So I've obviously missed him very much. We have no children as well fwiw.
After finishing work on Friday night at 7pm I got three trains to his and we both pretty much fell asleep instantly after a week's work and travelling.
Today we have spent time together, just lazing about which has been nice to enjoy each others company.
I was excited about an evening in to watch a film and have a cuddle or whatever, you know just a proper weekend together. His mate rang him asking him to come on FIFA on the PlayStation and he's said yes. I said how long will you be on and he said probably all night. He went on at about half eight even though I said it would upset me and came off at about ten and made a big deal about coming off early. I said if he was was going to pull his face all night then he may as well go back on because he's no use to me. He says I've made him look like a mug in front of his mates, but surely if anything I'm the mug for travelling all this way expecting a nice weekend together to be ignored for a playstation? He a grown man.
I do get that we have spent the day together so maybe I am being a bit precious about it, am I controlling? It's ended in me skriking me eyes out.

OP posts:
CrazyCatNerd · 25/05/2019 23:07

YABU in assuming a "grown man" can't like computer games.

YANBU in wanting to spend time together.

WithLotsOfSprinkles0 · 25/05/2019 23:10

YANBU

If he can't see what he's doing wrong here, there's something wrong with him.

You don't see eachother for 2 weeks and then he wants to leave you to play computer games??

ElizaPancakes · 25/05/2019 23:13

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with a grown man playing PS4 or Xbox or whatever. I think there’s a lot wrong with a man who allows his girlfriend to spend hours travelling to see him and then makes plans with someone else, which is basically what he did. I’m sure you would have been just as pissed off if he decided to go out with the mate.

Aquamarine1029 · 25/05/2019 23:13

He's not "trapped" in a child's body, he just chooses to behave like one. You can do a lot better.

Butterymuffin · 25/05/2019 23:26

No, that's a bit crap of him. Does he put his mates first at other times too?

nocoolnamesleft · 25/05/2019 23:29

It tells you where you come on his priority list.

WatcherintheRye · 25/05/2019 23:30

His mate rang him asking him to come on FIFA on the PlayStation and he's said yes

made a big deal about coming off early.

He says I've made him look like a mug in front of his mates

No, you haven't overreacted, op. Conclusive proof above that your dp has all the worst attributes of a 13 year old - self-centred, sulky and unreasonable. Did he also say "It's so unfair......I hate you!" as he stomped back to the PlayStation?

BumbleBeee69 · 25/05/2019 23:31

I'm cringing for him OP... he's a kid yes Flowers

yermawyabas · 25/05/2019 23:31

You have a man child op.

whatthehe11 · 25/05/2019 23:38

I just explained this to my husband who loves IT and computer games. His response re your boyfriend was "that weird". For what it's worth, I agree. He is selfish.

whatthehe11 · 25/05/2019 23:38

Oh and start putting yourself first

NunoGoncalves · 25/05/2019 23:42

Bit harsh on 13 year olds tbh.

NunoGoncalves · 25/05/2019 23:43

Can we make transage a thing? Like if I really feel like I'm a 13 year old trapped an older body, then I am 13 and should be treated as such?

BackforGood · 25/05/2019 23:46

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with a grown man playing PS4 or Xbox or whatever. I think there’s a lot wrong with a man who allows his girlfriend to spend hours travelling to see him and then makes plans with someone else, which is basically what he did. I’m sure you would have been just as pissed off if he decided to go out with the mate.

This ^
He, presumably has had 2 weeks to play on them each night. I would have expected him to say to his friend "Sorry mate, not tonight, my dp is here and I've hardly seen her this last fortnight. Speak tomorrow"

julensaor · 25/05/2019 23:48

what ages are you both?

Overmaars · 25/05/2019 23:53

I'd be really upset if my fifteen year old did this to a friend or girlfriend! And tbh he really, really wouldn't and he's a PS4 obsessive.

You know when people say on here that they never noticed any red flags early on their relationship, well this is one 🚩. He doesn't respect you and he'd rather upset you than not appear one of the lads with his mates.

It's up to you but it doesn't bode well for your future.

ReanimatedSGB · 26/05/2019 00:04

He's really not that bothered that you have made a long journey to visit him, is he? I'd dump and move on. There are plenty of other men ouot there.

Grainedmonkey · 26/05/2019 00:12

His mate rang him asking him to come on FIFA on the PlayStation and he's said yes

Seriously? OMG this is really scary. Absolutely sounds just like my 13 year old DS ! I was hoping they they just grew out of it.

I feel bad for you OP , are you actually going to put up with this guy?

Cherrysoup · 26/05/2019 00:12

That’s incredibly poor of him. Two weeks apart and he wants to play on the computer with his mates? No fucking way.

Saracen · 26/05/2019 00:16

I'm afraid it looks like he is not that keen on you. Flowers

I behaved toward my ex-fiance in a very similar way as your DP is doing to you. The explanation was simple: I preferred to be with my friends rather than with him. This became very clear when he moved away and spending time with him was no longer as convenient as it had been.

I'm sorry.

Grainedmonkey · 26/05/2019 00:16

For me it's not just the fact that you've been apart for 2 weeks, It's the whole playing FIFA thing when you're a grown man.

Grainedmonkey · 26/05/2019 00:22

Nuno Grin

UnderC0verAg3nt · 26/05/2019 00:57

He would rather play games with his mates, than spend time with you

You took time, effort, to spend time with him

You deserve better

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread