Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Pretend I'm ill or come clean that I dont want to be around them?

4 replies

MotherofaCat · 25/05/2019 12:39

Dont use mumsnet often so please bear with me.
My older sister is organising a surprise party for her husband next month and has sent me and invite, problem is I have hanging out with them and know it's going to be a huge inconvenience for me.
Firstly, They are obnoxious drunks who always end up in heated arguement with each other and those around them (not me though) their friends are racists and I struggle to have conversations with them, I am also expected to drive around getting things for the party and helping out with her young son. Plus, they live in a remote area so generally stay at my house (in a large town) when they are out and are terrible house guests. They smoke in my living room (I'm an asthmatic non smoker) drink all my alcohol, use every glass and dont clean up after themselves. The last time they stayed up to 4am arguing and listening to loud music after I went to bed despite me asking several times for them to turn it down and go to bed.
I've spoke to my friend about it and he has told me to say I'm sick and not go as they take advantage of me. My mum has said that I should just tell her (my sister) how I feel but I dont want to cause loads of drama. AIBU? What should I do about the party and inevitably them wanting to stay at mine?

OP posts:
Summerorjustmaybe · 25/05/2019 12:42

Maybe you will have had a tooth out that day and feel rubbish so stay home? Being honest would add fuel imo. If you are happy to, offer to have her dc overnight as a goodwill gesture. Least the poor dc will be out of their dramatics that way...

QueenofallIsee · 25/05/2019 12:43

Say no, but go with ‘ we have friends staying’ so no room for them either. I’d only say ‘ no I don’t want to as you are wankers’ if you are ready for the inevitable fall out. Don’t get me wrong, they sound godawful but a family drama is draining and depressing - in this case I’d fib. If you say you’ll go and then claim to be I’ll, they will still want to stay no doubt so nip that in the bud!

TapasForTwo · 25/05/2019 12:44

Just say sorry you are unable to attend. Don't give any excuses, or just say you are busy that day. And when they want to stay with you say you are busy. People like that always take advantage of people who won't stand up to them. You maybe need to learn how to be more assertive.

MotherofaCat · 25/05/2019 12:59

Thanks for the feedback so far. I usually do look after my nephew while they are out so dont mind it but the expectation that I will not drink so I can watch him (on top of everything else) really annoyed me. I'm considering inviting a group of my friends, going for an hour or two then leaving early meaning my house will be too full for them to stay aswell?

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread