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AIBU?

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Original poster

Splitting the bill - from a waitress’s POV.

401 replies

MazDazzle · 25/05/2019 10:53

If you’re out for a meal in a large group and you want to pay individually, how do you go about it?

I’m a waitress in a smallish bistro. It’s a nice place and we do our best to accommodate our customers. We had a table of 23 last night: starters, mains, pudding and some sides, plus cocktails and coffee. Instead of asking for the total bill, each person came up to the til one at a time and asked to pay for what they had.

I had to listen patiently while each person tried to remember what they had. It’s a long process; I had to log in/out multiple times for each customer, shut down screens, open new ones, trawl through the very long bill trying to find each item, create a new table for each customer, cut and paste it to a new bill... this is before we get to the cash/card payment. 23 times!

It took a good 3 mins per customer, so for over an hour the restaurant floor was one person short. It happens all the time and both the restaurant owners and staff are sick of it.

WIBU to say ‘Sorry, we’re unable to make up individual bills, but I’m happy to print out multiple copies of the total bill and provide a calculator. Each person can pay by cash/card, whichever is easiest.’

Would you think it was rude if a waitress said this to you?

OP posts:
VladmirsPoutine · 25/05/2019 13:01

Mind you, company drinks/dinners are the worst for this sort of thing.

TheRealShatParp · 25/05/2019 13:02

Is not providing individual bills telling them how to pay? It’s just telling them to manage their bill like adults and then pay how they choose to pay, cash or card etc. If they want to order together and have their food arrive together then I think that means getting a bill together.

Purplecatshopaholic · 25/05/2019 13:03

Splitting the bill so precisely is not my bag at all. We split the bill to the number of people there, add some in for a tip and get on with our lives!

LettuceP · 25/05/2019 13:04

LyingWitchIn how long have you been a waitress? You seem to know so much about what the job involves.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 25/05/2019 13:06

I've been a waitress, LettuceP, I'm not one now. What's the relevance?

diddl · 25/05/2019 13:07

It's fine when people are happy to work out what they've had & pay their share.

Sometimes you have to stand your ground if others want to split the bill though!

hmwhatsmynameagain · 25/05/2019 13:07

The restaurant needs to give back the menu with the prices on.
This is usually taken away after ordering so how TF does anyone work out what they owe?

RedHelenB · 25/05/2019 13:09

No I think yabu. I get that it's annoying but it s a customer is always right kind of situation so you need to suck it up UNLESS management gave made it clear from the onset. And in that case I think theyd they'd lose the custom of large parties.

CassandraCross · 25/05/2019 13:09

I must be very lucky that I go out to eat with reasonable, nice people who don't take the piss. If they did I wouldn't want to go out with them.

Same here Sparklingbrook.

Sparklingbrook · 25/05/2019 13:09

I just make a note on my phone of the prices when I order, I don't need the menu back.

MissMary0fSweden · 25/05/2019 13:12

Our usual group is a mix of drinkers and non drinkers, big eaters and little eaters- we always tell the waiting staff we need separate bills. I've never known it be an issue (always tell them upfront though, not at the end).

If a restaurant ever said no, I wouldn't make a fuss but I'd be very unlikely to go back. And at least working out the tip wouldn't be a problem.

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 25/05/2019 13:14

In a group people can and do behave differently.reasonable, inc nice people who don't take the piss
In a group The very same usually nice people underpay,dispute,a bill.
Having been to many group dos I’ve seen it.

LettuceP · 25/05/2019 13:14

LyingWitchIn then why do make assumptions? Not every restaurant has the same till system, the same table layout, not every server expects a tip. If you have been a waitress then I would expect you'd realise this. Also that most servers are on minimum wage so its probably nice to try not to make their job harder just so that you don't have to engage your own brain.

Honestly you sound like you don't have a clue how restaurants work so I'm amazed that you've worked in one.

LettuceP · 25/05/2019 13:19

LyingWitchIn also I'd say just don't tip from now on. Your money is not sacred and people aren't so desperate that they want to get on the floor and lick your boots for it.

bebeboeuf · 25/05/2019 13:20

Splitting the bill is fine in a large eparty when it’s one bill that gets divided and the waitress takes the same from each person but when people split by what each person ordered there always seems to be a deficit at the end.
Usually caused by someone being forgetful of what they ordered or some who are just wrong in thinking because they didn’t eat much of something they shouldn’t have to pay.
Who gets left with that at the end?
How do tips work when it’s like that?

I would be embarrassed if I was with this group as it seems wrong to expect you to have to redo the bill 23 times.

Did it all add up at the end and without any disagreement?
If so I’m impressed

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 25/05/2019 13:22

LettuceP It's your/our job to engage our brains when serving customers (as they're paying). It's not their job to make our lives easier. If they do then, fantastic, but if not, we do what we're paid to do. And we have to be able to calculate a bill. Somehow.

As I've said previously, there are good and not so good restaurants. Somebody who's worked in the trade is just as likely to be irked by slipshod/indifferent service as they are to be ultra-forgiving of poor service because they've 'been there'.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 25/05/2019 13:24

Didn't see you last post till now, LettuceP, I'm glad our paths will never cross.

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 25/05/2019 13:24

Bill deficit at the end.Usually caused by some who are just wrong in thinking because they didn’t eat much of something they shouldn’t have to pay

Is that actually a thing? sure I’ve ordered food and thought meh,not keen but certainly understood I have to pay
The only way you’d not pay for food ordered is if it is cooked wrong/poor quality
Eating a small amount of food isn’t a reason to not pay

Yabbers · 25/05/2019 13:28

This really winds me up. Whenever we go out for office socials, everyone thinks it's fine to have someone come to the table and take 15 card payments. I put my foot down at the last one and said it was going on my card and everyone could go to the bank on the way back to the office if they didn't have cash. The server thanked me.

It's so rude just to assume they are happy with taking so much extra time to do this. They are busy enough without having to deal with adults who are too lazy to make sure they have cash.

bebeboeuf · 25/05/2019 13:30

I don’t think it’s that common but I experienced it a few times in my younger youth (early 20’s) when some people think that if sharers were ordered but they decided to not eat them then they wouldn’t pay.

Fine if that’s agreed before hand but if they were the last to pay and everyone else has paid based on an equal share of sharers then there remains some left to be paid.

There have been countless times in large groups where we end up £20 or more short and someone just puts their hand into their pocket to save someone embarrassment or arguments.

It’s awful

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 25/05/2019 13:33

Yabbers, you're talking about office socials, I have business lunches with colleagues in mind. We need separate bills for expenses, you don't. We generally none of us exceed £30 so it's just a quick contactless set of payments. No big deal.

Bear in mind that not everybody's circumstances are identical to yours. In a social setting, I'd offer to do what you did but I wouldn't be 'putting my foot down' and instructing people, that's just bizarre.

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 25/05/2019 13:33

Last time I had this,I left cash inc tip for my share jumped a cab and left
Big deficit in bill,disputing who had what. I left them to it

MitziK · 25/05/2019 13:35

Most people would be fine, but if you've been inflicted with the end of term teacher do, there will be no end of whingeing.

RainbowWaffles · 25/05/2019 13:35

I couldn’t imagine eating out with a group of people for whom splitting the bill without the assistance of the waitress presented a prohibitively complex task.

If you have had broadly the same or just don’t care, equal split. Otherwise just work out what you owe per person and pay that. Everyone pay by card or one person pays then others transfer. Surely it would take forever for all of us to go through the process of rotting up amount a one by one with the waitress. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

I am with you OP, it seems woefully irritating and unnecessary.

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 25/05/2019 13:36

I have to say,anyone putting their foot down would be told where to put the foot
I don’t need a bumptious adult telling me how to pay or organise my money
So no I’d not be falling in line,or instructed. Bizzare anyone thinks it’s ok to do this