Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Gender reveal parties?

57 replies

Cersaj · 25/05/2019 03:38

AIBU to wonder who fills the balloons? I've had a few Facebook acquaintances upload videos of their reveal, and strangers' are always popping up in recommended stories, and they have these balloons filled with either blue or pink confetti which the couple burst to reveal their baby's sex.

I can't get my head around why people have these parties at all who puts the confetti into the balloons. Originally I thought the couple themselves did it to reveal to their family, but I've seen loads where the couple look nervous before bursting the balloons and are weeping with happiness afterwards. Is it all an act? Or is there a special job where a person can be hired to get the information and fill the balloons? Are midwives moonlighting as party planners?

Who is filling the balloons? Even Google has turned up no answers.

OP posts:
Pinkprincess1978 · 25/05/2019 08:33

I think any excuse for a party is a lovely idea.

In cases where the parents didn't know (it's sometimes a case that the parents know but are revealing to family) but usually the sonographer wrote it down and sealed the envelope and this is then given to the baker/party shop or maybe a grandparent is told and the scan and arranged it for the couple.

FabulouslyGlamourosFerret · 25/05/2019 08:47

I can’t get heated up about them in themselves, but I always picture a “cake smash” in their immediate future

This!! ... #cakesmashwankers

Whisky2014 · 25/05/2019 08:59

So bad for the environment and a farce at the same time.

calpop · 25/05/2019 09:14

I think they're ludicrous. Mainly because they are revealing the sex of the baby not its gender. Also enforces the stupid blue/pink stereotypes.

Punxsutawney · 25/05/2019 09:20

When I was pregnant with oldest Ds 19 years ago our hospital trust had a policy of not telling parents the sex of their baby at the 20w scan. The private scans were not really around much either. Everyone had to wait until the birth of their child.

KC225 · 25/05/2019 09:24

I think they are a bit silly, a bit 'me me me' but I can't get worked up over it.

ScreamingValenta · 25/05/2019 09:32

I don't care if people want to have 'gender reveal' parties - just don't wreck the environment with helium balloons. That goes for other types of party too.

FlibbertyGiblets · 25/05/2019 09:34

Punxsutawney yy same here. The sonographer could make a stab at the sex but were v discouraging of anyone asking. It is a clinical scan for medical reasons etc. By the time I had final baby they were more obliging re sex but by then we were all nah the others were surprises at birth, keep it schtum please, we'll wait til baby born, ta.

Alconleigh · 25/05/2019 09:53

Yep they are ghastly. No one cares! But yes it's the same people who bore on about their wedding colour scheme for 18 sodding months before the (inevitably utterly generic) big day.....dullards generally.

MereDintofPandiculation · 25/05/2019 10:07

It is ridiculous because babies DO NOT HAVE A FUCKING GENDER!!!!
They are male or female.

30 years ago we were being advised on job applications to ask people their gender not their sex, because their sex was about who they wanted to make love with, and was independent of whether they were male or female. It seems the meaning has shifted.

userabcname · 25/05/2019 10:23

I had a 16w private scan and they offered to set up one of those balloon things but we declined. You can also get them to write it down and put it in an envelope (I guess if you're on the fence about finding out or want to do it with your whole family). I have seen quite a few of those videos and the absolute worst ones are where they clearly haven't got the sex they were hoping for and look really disappointed at first. I hope they delete those videos so the future child doesn't see it!

BogglesGoggles · 25/05/2019 10:28

You can go to a balloon shop and given them a piece of paper where the midwife has written the sex and ask them to fill a balloon with the corresponding colour. Or you can get a baker to do the sponge in the corresponding colour (way way better because cake).

BogglesGoggles · 25/05/2019 10:29

@meredintofoamdiculation sounds like your HR department got confused between sex and sexuality

lucymegan · 25/05/2019 10:36

No one cares!

What a weird thing to say!

Of course people care. The family's care and are excited.
I love anything baby related. Pregnancy announcements, births, birth story's. Gender reveals, Baby showers, cake smashes, watching the babies grow into toddlers and so on..

What sort of person doesn't get excited for a friend or family member?

ethelfleda · 25/05/2019 10:57

Another way to squander the world’s resources; making a private moment into a vulgar (and instagrammable ) public display that someone can make money out of

This!

BumandChips · 25/05/2019 11:06

I know a couple who announced the gender and name together- what if he doesn't look like a Toby (not actual name!)?! And what's left for people to care about when he's here? Obviously immediate family will care but the people that will only see their millions of Facebook posts will be bored of poor Toby before he even arrives.

Yeah this is sort of how I feel. I think there is something about over sharing that irritates me. By the time you’ve done the gender reveal, shown everyone the 4D scan and announced the name to all, what else is there to say when they baby arrives? Apart from ‘oh they’re here’. There’s nothing left to announce.

It’s also massively attention seeking.

NunoGoncalves · 25/05/2019 11:11

What sort of person doesn't get excited for a friend or family member?

Mumsnet users!

NunoGoncalves · 25/05/2019 11:13

I know a couple who announced the gender and name together- what if he doesn't look like a Toby (not actual name!)?!

Where I live, 99% of people tell you the name of their baby before it is born. It's a way of connecting to the baby and being able to talk to them, etc. It's nice. If I asked somebody "what if he doesn't look like a Toby?" they would probably laugh a lot. Babies "looking like" a name is not a thing here. A baby just looks like a baby. They assume whatever name you give them.

BumandChips · 25/05/2019 11:32

What sort of person doesn't get excited for a friend or family member?

It funny but my family still managed to be excited about my children without the baby showers, gender reveals and cake smashes. Amazing eh?

Aprillygirl · 25/05/2019 12:29

Don't know, and as long as I never feel forced to go to one of these awful ostentatious events I don't really care.

lucymegan · 25/05/2019 13:57

@BumandChips so they'd of been less excited if you had of had all those things? Sad that 😔

milkshak3 · 25/05/2019 14:07

I don't why they get called 'gender' reveal. In all its tackyness, at least call it what it is - but you have no way of knowing the gender Confused

pikapikachu · 25/05/2019 14:13

Doing something special for the baby's sibling(s) can be lovely but reveal parties/videos are tacky in the extreme for everybody else who only care about the health and number of babies arriving.

I can't help but wonder why people post videos of children getting upset that their new sibling will be the wrong gender. The older version of that crying child will be embarrassed and the "baby" could end up being annoyed that their sibling wanted the opposite sex.

pikapikachu · 25/05/2019 14:14

The videos of kids opening an envelope and finding that they've been adopted by their foster parents make me 😭 as do videos of kids being surprised by the arrival of their parent/sibling who's normally away with the armed forces.

pikapikachu · 25/05/2019 14:16

What sort of person doesn't get excited for a friend or family member?

People don't give a fuck if the baby is going to be a boy or girl- they are equally happy with either outcome.