To be utterly fed up of being the only one that does DIY?

[Fiveredbricks]

... and the only one who can use a sodding drill, or hang a picture or paint a fecking wall or put a flatpack together without damaging it?!

Our living room windows are really tall. 1905 terraced with high-ish ceilings and the windows go pretty much all the way up. Even with a 5ft stepladder my 5ft 6 apparently short in the world of DIY arse cannot balance on the ladder and hold my drill at the same time as I'm over stretching.

DH is 6ft and can reach fine... "I don't know how to do it" he bemoans as I then show him for the 56th time. Nope. Still doesn't get it 🤷

We can't afford to pay someone. No one will come out for such a small job without charging a small fortune. No one has a taller set of ladders to lend me. I've even just gone and knocked around a few neighbours.

It is 12 small drill holes. I just wanted curtains up in the living room after already living here for 3 months.

AIBU to be fed up of having to do it all, all the damn time because he can't be arsed to learn?!

No one taught me, btw. I taught myself from watching other people and youtube. Why can't he? :(

YANBU

I'm also responsible for all the DIY and bloody hate it. DH will say he doesn't know how to do something, but no matter how many times I show him he'll say he can't do it. Even simple tasks like putting up a picture are beyond him.

I do all the DIY. Doesn't bother me as its way more stressful watching DH do it badly.

My dw does most of the diy in our house and has used Pinterest and you tube to learn how. She just has more confidence in her own abilities to try stuff than me.
I do the majority of the every day chores though so it balances out.

Would it be worthwhile getting a longer set of ladders so that you can reach it?

YANBU!

My DH is lovely but handy he is not. He doesn’t even change lightbulbs. Half of me wants him to at least try the DIY jobs but the other half of me is worried about what he’ll damage in the process!

If I could afford a new set of ladders right now I could afford to pay for someone to come out and drill them for me 😁

Sadly, I cannot until August as every penny is accounted for 😭

Currently very jealous of those who have husbands/partners (who are taller than me and also) able to do DIY!

I might break the broadband and try and bribe the engineer to do it for a cup of tea and an extra bourbon! 😂

Has your husband not got any tall friends who could help? Might also emasculate him enough if you ask him to get a mate to help that he will pull his finger out and learn how to do simple DIY.

So stop doing it.

@peachesandcream14 I wish. They're all just as hopeless and obviously missed the DIY training academy that so many clearly went to (also now I think about it, they all coincidentally had shit absent fathers so maybe that's a part of it too 🤷)

My best friend's bloke said he'd come over but he's deployed until about October 😳

@YukFoo yeah, dead helpfulthat would be, eh. I'll just not fix the taps when they break or the carpet if it comes up, or redecorate when the walls are worn and marked 🙄Should I not put any pictures up at all or shelves? Maybe you'd like to live in a bare shithole, but I don't.

Not at all Fiveredbricks. My home is lovely thank you.
However if you want to be a martyr then that's up to you. Either carry on with it or down tools.

My husbands a bit like this. Except he's an engineer and he can do it if he wishes. He simply doesn't wish. He says everytime he does diy he devalues the house so best not to try. He will drill a hole, but only if I whinge enough and get the drill put to do it myself.

I hung all the pictures in the house, and we have a lot. I used an old fashioned hammer and picture hooks. He really pissed me off at the weekend as I heard him saying to a friend about how he'd hung all the pictures in the house. I immediately butted in and said no you didn't I did. He then said, well I did some. I was happy to cause an argument in front of guests as I was annoyed at the lie. So I responded. No you fucking didn't. You didn't even hang one. I did ever fucking one of them!, He just looked at me stoney faced and moved on with the subject.

It's one thing not to do it and let your wife. it's a whole other ball game when you start bullshitting your mates you did. In front of me too!

I getcha. I do it all.

Yukfoo

What would you suggest instead?

My DH doesn't have the confidence to do it, we can't afford someone to do it. So when the curtain rail drops off the wall or the toilet breaks should I just leave it?

Would it be too expensive to rent a longer ladder from a tool hire place?

YANBU. I hate the eternal disclaimers/statements of helplessness some men come up with ... that Hugh Grant presentation of helpless fallibility. Well, fuck that. 'What do you mean you can't cook? You can read? Here's a recipe'. 'Never done basic DIY? Try holding this drill in hour hand and pressing that little button. Yes, that black one. Right there. Can you read? Good. Here's the instructions with a step by step guide of how to drill a hole'. I ended up doing the DIY. And finances. And childcare. And working full-time. There's a reason he's an ex.

In academia, I came across people who 'couldn't do admin'. So it was given to someone who could (and who was already doing over and above their fair share). Ex still throws up his hands in horror if he's asked to produce a powerpoint. A fucking powerpoint.

Don't put up with it.

Yeah my ex was like this. Note ex.
Our 2 sons are downstairs at the moment wall mounting a flat screen telly, they learn anything they need off YouTube.
You could just have a baby and wait for them to be old enough to do DIY, OP?

@ChiaraRimini He's 2 next week and currently trying to get in to the toolbox with his Melissa and Doug fluffy duster, I'm not holding my breath 😂