rant

[slinkyjo]

im sick of it! i get up every morning with my dc and my dp stays in bed, he gets up a couple of hours later and has the fucking cheek to ask if im ok, by then my dc have driven me mad as my ds is always so grumpy in the morning and the dogs all excited cause im up so have him running around, it takes me about half hour to even get the coffee on grrr it fucks me off, sorry.

Hmm, simply refuse to get out of bed.
Even if you have to fake being ill.

It's hard to do tho.

he does get up with them some mornings but i always get up half hour later cause i feel bad, i just want some help in the mornings

yanbu. but why have you allowed that situation to have developed? surely alternate days to lie in is the fairest way to work it?

its always been like this we have only been together 18 mths, he sees the kids as his own but dont want to force him into anything

x posts. dont feel guilty when it's his morning! i just bury my head under the pillow and block all the chaos out!

x posts again. ah, didnt realise they were his dsc. hmm, maybe a quiet word where you calmly explain that some help in the morning would be appreciated as you find them quite stressful. If its a relationship worth its salt he should be happy to help you.

thanks dirty think its time we had a chat, im so fed up with it im sat here crying ffs i dont cry

Don't feel guilty woman. You totally earn a rest. GOD, I flip out if DH doesn't get up on his day. It doesn't happen often tho, but I need my lie in, and so do you.

Buy ear plugs, I do. It really helps. Then sternly tell yourself that he can cope they are his kids, he needs to have alone time with them, for their, and his (and your) sakes.

oh slinky, dont be sad
Im sure if he knew you were this upset he would be more supportive.
Have a nice calm chat about it later and hopefully you'll come to a compromise. If not well maybe you need to have a think about where your relationship is heading.

when he gets up with them, WHY ON EARTH DO YOU THEN GET UP HALF AN HOUR LATER????

that would infuriate me, if i let dp lie in and then he doesn't. i would think why bother? you must like getting up or something.

so, next time he gets up with them, stay in bed. then when you do get up be super nice to him, "what a lovely rest i had, i feel great, big kiss, lovely to ds" etc etc.. he will then do it more to see you so happy? non?

i think because they are not her dp's children and she has only been with this guy 18 months amidiwish, so she feels guilty.

I had this problem - started to take the dog out for a long walk so that DP would do his share - found it impossible to lie in bed listening to the chaos.

It did work - but we still split up

sounds like he's doing his share though.on your mornings he has a lie in, on his mornings he lets you have a lie in and gets up but you still get up half an hour later.there's nothing he can do about that,that's your decision so i don't see what you're blaming him for.

oh i see
but still, it really doesn't sound like it is his fault if you get up half an hour later..?
or would you rather not take "turns" - just all get up? you need to talk to him.