Friend's husband having an affair!

[Tinkerbellone]

My best friend has just found out her husband is having an affair. She's clearly in a state. She has two children.

She has text me early hours asking for my help. I'm seeing her today.
I have seen so many threads offering help and advice on here.
Please help lovely people of Mumsnet ...What does she need to do first?

Tell her not to make any decisions right now. She is in shock and needs to be cared for and listened to by friends. She needs time and distance from him and practical support from friends to just make it through the day. There will be time for her to hear the facts from him and make decisions but not now. Her feelings will change from day to day so she can't rely on them right now. She is lucky to have you. She will absolutely survive this and one day it will all just be a memory, but there's a long road ahead.

Well initially she'll need a hug and a non judgemental ear.
Does the husband know she knows?
She may need you to be a sounding board while she decides if this is the end of the marriage or if this is something they might work through.
That will depend on a heap of factors I expect so keep calm and let her thrash it all out.
If it looks like separation is the decision you could help her get an appointment asap for legal advice. That will be crucial. She'll need to know where she stands financially, her rights to where they're currently living etc.
If she's going to ask him to leave she may need a handhold while doing that. Depending on the man and the situation it could be difficult to get him out.
If you feel she's struggling, a gentle suggestion to see her GP would be in order.
On a practical note she may need a hand with the kids. If they know, they will be distressed and even if they haven't been told they will pick up on how mum is feeling so really whatever you can do to help out today and keep the atmosphere calm if you can. .
Lastly, encourage her to tell her family if they are good, reliable people.
If this is a serious crisis, the more support the better.
Good luck. She's very lucky to have a caring friend.

Thank you
I think she is panicking and she is all over the place.
Her sister is with her now x

Another one here saying that right now, today, all she really needs is for you to be there. Listen to her talk, don't try to persuade of anything. She doesn't need someone to tell her to leave her husband, or take him back, she just needs someone to listen to her.

Hugs, chocolate, wine, pizza. General support.

Good luck!

As above
AND
whatever she says don't slag him off or offer opinions on him unrelated to the issue.
She may decide to try and make a go of it and if you are vocal about him you may end up being the fall guy.
It's criticising family - ok for you to criticise your own family not ok for anyone else to do so.