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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Phones being broken

18 replies

Iamnotagoddess · 18/05/2019 16:42

We pay for DSDs mobile phones.

DSD1 has a “chequered” record with phones and got through about 5 in two years (if it had been my choice I would not have continued to replace them).

Since they both got ungraded phones last year and she spent months with a “brick” she has been pretty good she actually looked after it.

DSD2 has been good with hers but took the cover off the new one and refused to use the case we got her.

They went camping and the phone got wet, and was quite possibly salvageable.

They then absolutely destroyed it stamping on it, smashing the screen, throwing it around until it was bent and the metal is all distorted and the components are hanging out of the phone, DSD1 said she tried to snap it saying it was broken anyway.

When we got the phones we got them insured but I suggested to DH he didn’t tell them this, which he did anyway.

So today he took DSD2 to the phone shop and she is having a brand new phone delivered tomorrow. The excess was £30 which I really feel she should have to do something towards paying this back (they don’t get pocket money - we pay for their phones instead).

AIBU to feel pissed off that he has happily replaced something she has wilfully destroyed without ever really telling her off Hmm

OP posts:
Original poster
Iamnotagoddess · 18/05/2019 16:42

Sorry she destroyed it not they.

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Original poster
Iamnotagoddess · 18/05/2019 18:35

Anyone ...?

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NoBaggyPants · 18/05/2019 18:39

I can't understand how this was covered on insurance, it's blatantly wilful damage. Are you sure he's being honest with you?

On what you've said I'd be refusing her any phone at all for a good period of time.

Original poster
Iamnotagoddess · 18/05/2019 18:41

DH said it was run over by a car (which was believable) I was furious that she was there with him while he lied!

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Wadrin · 18/05/2019 18:44

I’ve given up with phones and smashed screens. It’s one after the other in my house.

Although I am particular shit with mine so I understand how it happens.

NoBaggyPants · 18/05/2019 18:44

He's teaching his kids that it's OK to wilfully damage things and then make fraudulent insurance claims.

What a mess.

Original poster
Iamnotagoddess · 18/05/2019 18:47

I have a huge issue with the lying as their mother often tells them to lie to us them they get told off for lying about other things it’s so bloody confusing for them Hmm

The phones thing also massively pisses me off as IMHO it’s a privilege that we do not have to pay for and they are abusing that (to put it lightly).

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Original poster
Iamnotagoddess · 18/05/2019 18:53

If it was one of my own kids there is no way it would have been replaced or paid the excess.

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WineGummyBear · 18/05/2019 18:56

Another one pointing out that your DH just committed insurance fraud.

If you are worried about their behaviour, look to his.

Original poster
Iamnotagoddess · 18/05/2019 18:58

I am pissed off at his behaviour.

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magoria · 18/05/2019 18:59

Your DH is setting these kids up for massive problems not giving them any boundaries and teaching them lying is a good way to get what you want in life.

How can he think rewarding a child who wilfully destroyed something with a new one is a good idea.

He is happy to lie and commit fraud (basically screwing over the rest of us when our insurances etc go up). What do you see in him? How can you have any respect for him?

endofthelinefinally · 18/05/2019 19:01

The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

blackcat86 · 18/05/2019 19:03

Is he trying to be fun time dad or worried about the ramifications with the ex if the phone isn't replaced? DH pays for DSSs phone bill and several have been broken as well as us having a £300 phone bill for over using data. It's been minimised every time or DSSs mum has started to put pressure on about how he needs a phone for emergencies and she cant afford it. The phone bill is now shocking because DH has had to get early upgrades and extra lines. I don't agree with it at all and there is no way I would be doing that with DD. It drives me mad. DSS has no respect for his belongings and just moans if he wants the latest whatever.

Original poster
Iamnotagoddess · 18/05/2019 19:04

I personally would not and have not committed insurance fraud but I think that’s actually a separate thread.

I have my own issues atm with an insurance company on the other side of the fence.

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Original poster
Iamnotagoddess · 18/05/2019 19:06

@blackcat86

Similar situation with DH parenting by guilt rather than role modelling behaviour.

His ex doesn’t put pressure on us but he knows she won’t pay for their phones as she has huge debts and struggles to pay for the things they do actually need.

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caughtinanet · 18/05/2019 19:17

No one's picking up about the wilful damage to the phone, are the DC NT? That's really not behaviour I'd expect of children old enough to have phones in the first place.

Original poster
Iamnotagoddess · 18/05/2019 19:20

12 & 14

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Original poster
Iamnotagoddess · 18/05/2019 19:56

And they break everything we have ever given them.

For this reason I am always reluctant to give them anything nice or of monetary or sentimental value Sad

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