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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Got a low mark in my masters essay and disappointed - scared I'm not good enough

16 replies

FailureFear · 17/05/2019 16:14

I got 51% so essentially scraped a pass really. All my other marks to date have been in the sixties and now worried they were all maybe flukes. A second marker comes in over the summer and randomly checks and re marks work, and wondering if my results might all go down!

I have a massive fear of failure but was growing my confidence and now it's been knocked.

I'm happy that I passed it at the end of the day, and will try to take it on the chin but a part of me is wondering now if I just look foolish trying to get myself a masters degree. Worried as just beginning the dissertation due at the end of the summer, and wondering if my lecturer now thinks I'm not fit for the work involved.

How do I get over myself? If you had your confidence dented at uni what did you do?

I'm really worried I've failed my other project I'm waiting for a mark for now too.

OP posts:

Original poster

FailureFear · 17/05/2019 16:16

Ugh I feel so embarrassed by even admitting it here I know it's not the end of the world and a total first world problem though.

OP posts:

mbosnz · 17/05/2019 16:24

First off, the fact that all your other marks have been in the 60's, and this is the only one you have in the 50's. Don't you think it's more likely that this is the exception, then, the 50's, and the rest of your marks are more likely to be a more accurate representation of your abilities?

Secondly, I would, if it were possible, go to my lecturer, and get feedback on why this one was not up to parr, and if there's anything they can suggest I focus on improving.

Thirdly, there is no reason to think that the other one that you are waiting on is a poorer result than you are hoping for/expecting. One in no way affects the other, does it?!

Don't be embarrassed. It's really upsetting when you have poured your heart and soul into something and it feels like you've been slapped in the face with a wet cod back.

Now, you cannot do anything about these marks. It's Friday. Try to put it out of your head, unwind, and recharge, to go back refreshed.

Nottheboreworms · 17/05/2019 16:25

I used to be a marker/moderator for a distance learning Masters course. If your other marks have been in the 60s you're doing really well. It's more likely the 51% is the outlier. Perhaps you didn't quite achieve the same depth of analysis in that piece of work but you still passed. Don't be hard on yourself. Good luck with the dissertation!

Nottheboreworms · 17/05/2019 16:26

Cross post!

SaskiaRembrandt · 17/05/2019 16:26

Oh, bless you. I can see why it dented your confidence. It's only one mark though, and your others have been good, so you need to find out why this one wasn't. We can't really tell you that, the best thing to do is make an appointment with your supervisor and ask them to go through it with you.

It's not a trivial problem, a masters is a big thing, it's completely understandable that you're upset!

Blondequeenie · 17/05/2019 16:33

I feel your pain, I was always too hard on myself during my masters as undergrad was very easy for me and suddenly masters was very challenging.

A 51% is not great for a masters level student but at the same time, its only 1 essay and will not ruin your future or does not mean your not a worthy student. You have clearly just answered the question wrong, not provided the analysis it required, went off topic, been to descriptive, not used a sufficient amount of journal articles, made sure that the beginning, middle and end flowed well, discussed topics that were relevant to the essay or a whole range of other possibilities.

As someone else suggested, get feedback, your external examiners will most likely not change a thing so do not worry about that at all. Just learn how to improve and make up you take their feedback on board. I am doing a PhD now and I know a thing or two about feedback, it sucks so much and I get a real knock to my confidence but in the long run it has really helped me become a better writer.

Some tips:

Make sure you provide clear and simple sentences, does not need to be too fancy in the writing.
Make sure what your are saying is accurate.
Do not repeat yourself a lot in different paragraphs, I have lost marks for this so much!
Explain in the intro what you are doing, what the essay question is and exactly what you will cover/examine. The reader does not like seeing some surprises come up that they weren't expecting.
Make sure you are analysing journal articles but that you are doing so within your sand-book, do not discuss topics that do not relate to your essay question.

I hope this helps.

InglouriousBasterd · 17/05/2019 16:45

Oh god are you me?! I had this happen recently. Literally identical situation. It was a rush job and i was so embarrassed after being in 60s and 70s for all the others. But at the end of the day it’s a pass, others will have done the same - respond to the feedback and put it behind you. To be averaging 60s you are definitely meant to be doing a masters!

(P.s. my next was nearly a distinction. Don’t let it knock your confidence)

KateTheShrew · 17/05/2019 16:53

I'm a lecturer and teach/masters level work. I'd agree with the PP who said that if all your other marks are in the 60s then it's more likely that the 51 is the outlier than that all the others are flukes.

Does the feedback make it clear what the marker thought the problems were with the essay? Do you understand what you'd need to do to improve next time? If not, do go and speak to your lecturer for some face-to-face feedback. And don't let it knock your confidence: if you really weren't up to doi ng a masters you wouldn't have got to this point in the year!

Sweetbabycheezits · 17/05/2019 16:56

I actually failed one essay in a master's course. It was completely my fault...I waited too long to start it, didn't choose a strong enough topic...it was pretty bad. I worked harder on the next assignment, nailed the final presentation, and ended up with a fairly good mark for the overall course. I also went on to do a PhD in the same department, so it had no detrimental effect. It happens...own it, speak to the lecturer about ways to improve, and move past it.

Skittlesss · 17/05/2019 17:00

Haha, inglorious, I was thinking she was me. All my grades have been high 60s, until my last essay which was a 55.

Maybe there’s a secret plot to mark all Master’s students with a 50-grade? 😂

DogInATent · 17/05/2019 17:29

Unless things have changed in the last couple of decades, unlike your undergraduate degree no one is going to ask for your mark/grade on a postgraduate degree - they're not graded on the certificate.

Get feedback on the essay, learn from it, take those lessons into your dissertation.

I had a massive academic slump during my masters but still made it through to the end with a pass. I took on too much too quickly and should have given myself more time. Hang in there, you'll make it.

Original poster

FailureFear · 17/05/2019 20:37

Thank you all for your replies, I'm having a large g&t and licking my wounds.

Tbh I'm very grateful to pass as honestly I suffer so badly from thinking I'm not good enough and a bit crap, but at the same time had dared to hope a little that I was going to get a high sixties mark, which I think would be a Merit.

It's not divided into 2.1s and 2.2s like undergrad but there are Merits and Distinctions as well as a Pass degree and I would love to manage a Merit!

OP posts:

AmIRightOrAMeringue · 17/05/2019 20:47

Hi do you not have a tutor? I. Sure they'd be happy to have a student asking for more specific feedback so they can do better next time! I think if you phrase it as youd be grateful for some pointers to improve (rather than challenging the mark) they'd be happy to help

SandunesAndRainclouds · 17/05/2019 20:50

I was having a similar discussion about a uni module I’m doing at the moment, and how I’d like a good pass. My tutor told me that one of her old students scored 5% over the pass mark and told her that was 5% wasted effort

How likely is it that anyone will ever look at merit etc in your role? Or will they just see the overall Masters and know you’re suitably qualified...?

KOKOtiltomorrow · 17/05/2019 21:03

The “problem” with some masters level work is that it is supposed to be independent student work - that is essentially what a dissertation is. So the student does the work ob their own. OP I do get where you are coming from but other coursework may have been more structured, more guidance etc. I get students all the time complaining that they “worked really hard” but only got a C whereas they got Bs for essays ....I tell them frankly that sadly you don’t get marks for effort, only for addressing the learning outcomes. A pass is a pass - one students good is C pass whereas another’s good will be an A pass. Getting a masters degree is amazing but not everyone will (or should) get merit or distinction simply because we all have different levels if (academic) ability.......if everyone got merit, there’s a problem

Shushandpat · 17/05/2019 21:06

Looks like the 51% is the reverse fluke if your other marks have been in the 60s. Look on the positive side: you can take the feedback on the 51% essay and use it to make your dissertation better. Have you an academic tutor? If so, you could make an appointment to talk through the feedback with them and see where you might have missed out on marks. you can do this!

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