AIBU to be suspicious of friends' hand washing skills?

[Mallowmarshmallow]

There seems to be a big going around between school mums and families. So far, touch wood, we have avoided it. My children seem fairly resilient to stomach bugs so far.

In friends' families it seems one child catches it, then another, then a parent, another parent then extended family....

AIBU to think that if anyone has a bug in your family you ensure everyone does extra good hand washing, cleaning, employ dettol spray in every corner of your house?

On the rare occasion either of our children has a bug it doesn't spread any further within the family....

I think half you time by the time you find out you have a bug in the household then it’s too late! I wouldn’t be worrying about friends handwahing skills.

But if your child has a bug you as a parent might spend time cuddling them where they are breathing vom germs on you, or dribbling on you, you might be with them while they are sick and little droplets spread it to you.

They will kiss you etc Before you even know they have it.

You are being ridiculous, bugs can get through good handwashing if it's your child! You have just been lucky.

You can do everything right and still catch bugs. We had two vomiting bugs over the winter. We did exactly the same for both (cleaning door handles, lots of hand washing etc). One bug spread through us all and the other one only infected the toddler.

I find it’s impossible to stop it spreading no matter what precautions you take or how thorough the handwashing! I wouldn’t worry about your friends’ hygiene.

Yes you are being unreasonable

I think it's fairly standard/expected that a bug will do the rounds of the household, but to spread to extended family seems a bit out of the ordinary.

Bugs spread because they're already doing their thing before the victim knows they've got it!

If it was just down to hand washing and dettol then I think you'd be up for a Nobel prize in medicine!

Just make up a very mild bleach solution and wipe it over light switches, door handles and toilets etc. Does a better job than Dettol sprays etc.

you’re being very judgemental, I can only presume that comes from being lucky enough as a family to apparently have robust immune systems and to rarely suffer from these bugs - and it is luck.

Just be thankful you’re not having to deal with a plague running riot through your home and stop worrying about other people’s situations.

My family never get tummy bugs even when there are loads going round and we're definitely not more careful hand washers than anyone else. If anything I've caught DC not washing their hands properly or at all sometimes after going to the loo (Yuck!). It's just luck of the draw - some people are more susceptible or unlucky than others. I doubt you're any better at hand washing than anyone else.

I imagine they spend lots of time together so it spreads fast. YABU, some bugs are vicious and it doesn't matter how much you wash your hands.

I'm with you a bit OP.

My house is clean but not sterile by any means, and we manage to contain bugs, by and large, to one person. Once when she was 4 DD1 passed one to DD2 who was 3. I don't overuse chemicals for cleaning but I confess when a bug comes in the dettol wipes and the domestos come out. I'm a pretty careful hand-washer anyway.

I will catch the bug if someone has it, I catch all the stomach bugs. No chance of me catching your cold or getting flu though. Lovely son hardly ever catches anything, no matter what. I think it's rarely to do with hygiene I'm just don't seem to have much resistance to some bugs.

You sound like my child-free friend, who told me I was getting loads of colds because I wasnt taking multiple vitamins like she was.

I pointed out she wasn't having a young toddler sneezing directly into her face like I was....

You have children, you should know better!

Toddler 21months started with it Sunday, was sick all over me and DH more than once, needless to say we caught it, not sure it could've been avoided, but tell me how for next time please!!

Well aren't you lucky to have such good hygiene measures in your house and such resilient children.

I feel sorry for your so called friend.

You have started a thread about her which is just mean. I am sure she is doing her best. If you're that bothered why don't you go an see if she needs any help.

YABU. Kids get sick all the time. If someone in your household is sick you are probably going to catch it, especially if it is a young child because they require so much close physical contact.

Also, for a lot of virus type things you are spreading it around during the incubation period so by the time you start showing symptoms of the illness you've probably already spread to everyone you've come into contact with over the last few days. They, in turn, will be spreading it around to everyone that they come into contact with, blissfully unaware that they are about to get sick.

It's great that you have a strict regime that seems to stop all of this from happening but I think most people aren't like this.

Washing my hands doesn't stop my son coughing in my face occasionally. (Luckily only caught his bugs once this way)

How do I do the spray and cleaning? I spend most of my life in bed as I’m disabled chronically ill. We aren’t all able to do these things just because you do. My dd is finally in yr 6 and I don’t have to drag myself out of bed daily to collect her at 3. I still somehow have to manage to feed us. If dd gets the bug I will probably get it too.

The only thing they’re doing wrong is mixing with others or having them over. Bugs can take over a week to die on hard surfaces.

I clicked on this thread expecting to agree with you as I’m all for hand washing and don’t agree with people not washing hands after the loo / before handling food etc

But YABVU

I think some people's hygiene regimes do leave plenty of room for improvement....you only have to read threads on here to know that

and I am not taking about the leg scrubbing ones and all the horror that people do not bleach and brillo their legs AM&PM but so many people display complete pride about ....

not washing their hands before prepping food,

Young children are going to be clingy when sick, so I don’t think any amount of handwashing will be any defence.

It's more than hand hygiene! Some people have better immunity to stomach viruses, either because their immune system functions better or they've built up some immunity through repeated exposure (e.g. hospital staff who are exposed to Norovirus often stop catching it after a few outbreaks, or get only mild nausea).

If a child vomits on you there's a good chance you'll inhale microscopic vomit paticles.

We dettol everything when there's a bug, put bleach down the loo, confine the affected person to one bathroom etc. DH never catches the bug but I get it most times, despite being very careful over hand hygiene!

I have never done the whole wiping of handles etc if people are ill, mine don't seem to get the bugs that go round the school, both children have had a sickness bug once so far and not at the same time, different years. I didn't get it, despite getting covered in vomit and liquid poo, neither did DH. I don't know why we don't though?

This is a nonsense.
Me and my DCs always get the same bugs. Everything is handled incredibly carefully. Everything is sterilised, bleached, antibacterial sprayed and wiped. Even all the cloths and sponges replaced. Beds stripped and changed, and put on a high wash with the towels. We wash our hands a lot, with antibacterial wash, and even more so when unwell.

Still all get ill. Usually by the time one person is sick it's too late. Mostly we manage to contain it to just our house and family, but not always even that.

YABU. By the time you show amy symptoms, yoube already had the bug in your system for a few days.

I work in healthcare, have extremely thorough hand-washing practice and my son and I still managed to pass a bug between us for about three weeks. My partner was fine the whole time.