Anyone else as lonely as me?

[justyouraveragegirl]

Didn't know what topic to base this under but here it goes.. So I've never really said this out loud but here I am, even typing it out is weird..
I used to have quite a few friends and a big friendship group but they all moved away or we just lost contact over the years. I'd say a lot of it was my own fault because I used to have panic attacks and anxiety so would cancel plans left, right and centre. Hence the losing contact.. I'm a bit older now and I can't help but feel like everyone around me has all these amazing friends and I feel like I have none. The people I've worked with for years are my closest friends they're the only people I talk to and I'm embarrassed to admit this! They're always going on about what they've done on the weekend and talking about seeing their best mates and all their friendship groups and I just sit there thinking well these girls don't even realise that I see them as my best friends because they're all's I have, but I'm not theirs.. I just feel like a loner and just super embarrassed by it.. anyone else or is it just me?

It's nothing to be embarrassed about, sometimes life just gets in the way. How is your anxiety now? Have you thought about maybe joining a club/hobby to widen your social circle? Is there anything you enjoy doing? Maybe you could do some voluntary work at the weekends? x

As people get older friendship groups tend to get smaller. Have you tried spending time with them outside of school. What about geyying in touch with old friends, social media is great for rekindling old friendships.

This is me now! I'm bored of being on my own after many upheavals that left me unsociable

Yep, I'm lonely too. Circumstances meant I moved around a lot, and as much as you intend to keep in touch with friends, you don't. I have tried meet up groups but never seem to find the right sort of people. I'm not embarrassed though and I tend to do a lot of things on my own, holidays/gigs/day trips. Sometimes though I just stay home alone, and could be the only person in the world as I don't see/hear from anyone. Are you London based?

Mumsnetters used to have meet ups years ago, not sure if that still happens?

I got bullied all through school so deleted my social media a long time ago. That's what started my anxiety and panic attacks. I don't have anxiety or panic attacks now. I met my friendship groups from college, other work from years back etc.. They all excelled and I just pushed myself back. At my current work where I've been working for years they all think I'm really confident and outgoing but I'm really not. I'd love a hobby but wouldn't join something on my own, I've asked people from work to join multiple things with me but they're not interested..

have you checked out your mumsnet 'local' group?

No how do I find the local group?

Most hobbies you go on your own, the few things I do I go myself not with friends; is that not a teenager thing?Join what you fancy and you'll get to know folks.

Actually I did use to go to the gym on my own and then I just stopped going because I got lazy but it's not really somewhere you tend to meet people, I would do some classes aswell but people seemed to mainly be with their friends so I would just be on my own. I just think when you're older it's so hard to find friends because they already have their groups from years back.. I just wish I hadn't pushed myself away from everyone back then I suppose

I totally get that, OP.

I have started volunteering and I've made a few friends that way. Are there any organisations locally you could volunteer for?

You’ll have to push yourself to do something on your own I’m afraid. It’s the only way. An evening class? Then basically everyone is on their own.