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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think that now I'm 57, my periods should have stopped!

94 replies

WeWantSweet · 15/05/2019 18:38

Missed odd months, then had a 4 month gap and thought that was it. But no, it's back to odd months again and alternating light and heavy.
Haven't had kids, so not sure if Mother Nature is punishing me, lol.

OP posts:
DisplayPurposesOnly · 15/05/2019 20:57

Christ, yes this is depressing. I'm 51 and still going strong...

borntobequiet · 15/05/2019 20:58

Oh and I asked for a hysterectomy but they wouldn’t do one, hence the horrible Mirena, which hurts when I get cramps and makes me feel bloated and uncomfortable.

Mokepon · 15/05/2019 20:59

Ok, I don't love having a period but I know I'm lucky as they aren't terribly problematic for me.
Maybe I should start another thread but what are the horrors of menopause other than hot flushes and forgetfulness. Seriously not being goady, I have no idea as Granny 1 sailed through it, mum had horrors due to other issues and Granny 2 would've crucified herself rather than talk about it so not a representative cohort!!

Teddybear45 · 15/05/2019 21:01

A lot of Indian women have periods until 60. Have even seen women in my family get pregnant naturally in their early 50s.

userxx · 15/05/2019 21:04

@DontCallMeShitley What happened? I have a feeling mine might stop soon, I actually think I'll miss them 😞

agnurse · 15/05/2019 21:08

Menopause doesn't usually go, regular, regular, regular, oh, wow, gone permanently!

A woman may be in perimenopause for several years before she finally enters menopause. We define menopause clinically as the cessation of menses for an entire year. Hormone tests can also be helpful, but are not required in most cases.

PSA: if you are of menopausal age and your periods have stopped for a year or more and then you suddenly start bleeding, you should go get checked out. Postmenopausal bleeding can be associated with malignancy. Sadly, this is not a theoretical risk; endometrial cancer (cancer of the uterine lining) is the most common reproductive malignancy in women.

PenguindreamsofDraco · 15/05/2019 21:08

Oh fuck that! I'm 46 and was blithely assuming things would be winding down any month now.

Anyone who fancies identifying into this side of being a woman? No, thought not.

Original poster
WeWantSweet · 15/05/2019 21:09

Oof Andylion that seems wrong. Hollow lol.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 15/05/2019 21:16

Still going bastard strong at 53

DinosApple · 15/05/2019 21:17

My mum was done by 45 after having symptoms from age 35.
She's now on a concoction of tablets for osteoporosis and other things to combat the effects of early menopause.

Having said that I wouldn't want to be 64 and still having periods Shock, I'd settle for around 50- if only we could choose!

buckeejit · 15/05/2019 21:19

Ugh, I'm 41 & veering towards not wanting any more dc & hoping that if my brain eventually gets there then the body shuts that part down!

RedRiverShore · 15/05/2019 21:25

DM was about 60, I was in my mid 40s, there’s no telling when it will happen. In my case the menopause time wasn’t hereditary

tempytemp · 15/05/2019 21:29

Flipping heck, I am 50 and thought I was nearly done, surely not 10 more years? Still, agree the later the better from a bones point of view.

Zenithbear · 15/05/2019 21:30

My mum and auntie were both having periods until 60.

KissUntilTheyDieOfRabies · 15/05/2019 21:31

Spent a year in chemical menopause. Really enjoyed it. Was scheduled for a hysterectomy but I hadn't lost enough weight. Threw a hissy fit of pent up frustration Decided to just walk away from being poked and prodded.

agnurse · 15/05/2019 21:32

Early menopause lowers your risks for breast and ovarian cancer - but it also raises your risks for osteoporosis.

Me, personally, I think I'd take the risks of breast and ovarian cancer from later menopause over the risk of osteoporosis. Cancers can be fixed. OP can lead to severe fractures and bone pain, which often can't be fixed. (Often the fractures simply will not heal due to the state of the bones, and frequently they are what we call vertebral compression fractures - the vertebrae are literally crushed by the weight of the spine. These don't lend themselves to an easy fix.)

AppropriateAdult · 15/05/2019 21:32

Red, there are many HRT preparations that are suitable to use while you still have a menstrual cycle - I'm not sure why your doctors are refusing to prescribe for you but it might be worth having another chat about it.

Original poster
WeWantSweet · 15/05/2019 21:34

From this limited survey it seems the peri-menopause/menopause experience is ^unpredictable luck of the draw" territory.

OP posts:
LellyMcKelly · 15/05/2019 21:37

I’m 51 and I’ve been tested for hormone levels as I have the mirena (so don’t have periods though still have PMS) and a number of fibroids. My hormones are still going great guns. Doctor reckons that if I have the coil removed I could still get pregnant 😮

dudsville · 15/05/2019 21:38

I noticed all my friends in early 40s stated talking about peri, but only one of them actually finished. There's a real wish amongst all the women i know for the monthly cycle to be over!

CatherineOfAragonsPrayerBook · 15/05/2019 21:40

Out of interest, those blessed of the prolonged menses, are you married/ in a relationship? I'm wondering if that keeps the fertility drive going from a physical point of view? I mean are you sending inadvertent signals that erm, pregnancy might still be possible, and thus your brain and body is trying its best to get you in the pregnancy way?

Tricking the body ifyswim?

So desperate to avoid menopause I'm willing to go as far a getting a man in if it helps give my body a reason to keep the flow happening till late in lifeGrin

over50andfab · 15/05/2019 21:40

@borntobequiet - similar story to yours though a few years younger. Had Mirena i stalled in mid 50s to deal with mega heavy periods (used a moon cup and pads for many years before). Periods initially knocked on the head - yay - and GP explained I’d never know when they stop totally and I think it’s being left in for 10 yrs.

I’ve not had PMS as such - just a heavy womb feeling every so often with some dark discharge. Any idea if you know if this means without the coil periods would still be happening? Or perhaps it’s just a natural shedding of womb lining. I have had bladder frequency and an ultrasound showed up fibroids - which are not supposed to be a problem if the Mirena is in - and also in older ladies with oestrogen depletion Confused. I’m also taking oestrogen only HRT - Evorel patches. No meno symptoms as such - though getting spotty on my face and upper arms for some reason

Re what a couple of other posters have said

  1. yes, periods lasting longer means more oestrogen so better bone health, so a good thing

  2. if you stop your periods when you are older it doesn’t mean you will be less likely to have meno symptoms..hot flushes etc

  3. some women have meno symptoms that last for years from before periods stop to years after they’ve had their last periods...sorry 😟

Spacie · 15/05/2019 21:42

Menopause doesn't usually go, regular, regular, regular, oh, wow, gone permanently!
Mine did. I was 48.

PeachNut · 15/05/2019 21:43

48, 3 periods in 2017 and nothing since!

agnurse · 15/05/2019 21:49

Spacie

This is true, it can. My mother knew a woman who had a whole pile of kids, back to back. At one point she had 8 children preschool and under! And those weren't all of her kids!

After she had her last baby, she went into immediate menopause.

My point is that this, and your experience, while possible, are not necessarily typical experiences.