AIBU or is marriage supposed to be a partnership whereby you discuss major decisions that will affect the whole family with your spouse?

[b0bb1n]

Just that really.

Depends …. one couples significant decision may not be anothers.

Yes. Why is your post so vague?

YANBU but why so vague?

Well, it depends, doesn't it?

If one spouse is seriously ill in hospital, then no, I wouldn't expect the other to consult them on every decision. Or if one is happy to trust the other to take responsibility for a particular area.

Every relationship is different. You have to work out how yours will work and what communication and shared decision-making you want.

I agree with @IAmTheChosenOne - for some people announcing that you've changed the colour of the car you're buying from red to blue is akin to 'Oh, btw, just accepted a job on another continent'

Generally, though..Without everyone giving "what if" scenarios..
Yes that's what should happen.

Why do people DO this? Start threads that have no explanation?

Or that have a thread title that is misleading like... 'A man came into my house!' (when it was only the garden,') and 'AIBU to not want to work?' then start the first post with ... 'I mean as many hours as I HAVE been doing?' So the meaning in the thread is completely different to the title!

Very annoying!

Depends what you consider a major decision.

I’d consider a major decision something that costs over £500. My husband considers what we eat for dinner as a major decision

Depends on the couple and the situation, I wouldn't bat an eyelid at my DP coming home with a new car but my mum would be murderous about that same situation in her marriage. That's because she has a vested interest in choosing a new vehicle whereas I don't because I don't drive. Equally, DP doesn't give a shit if I buy a new sofa as long as its comfy whereas for my parents, that would be a long drawn out consultation. (both real life examples by the way)

I was more annoyed when DP booked us a holiday without consulting me because I would have liked to have a say in where we go.

Michelle Obama said "Marriage is a full on merger, a reconfiguring of two life’s into one, with the well being of the family taking precedence over any one agenda or goal."

I think she summed it up perfectly.

What is your post actually about?

What's your point?