Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

People who post mental health memes on social media

64 replies

DonkeyHohtay · 15/05/2019 17:27

AIBU in thinking they are the last people you'd turn to in a crisis?

Those twee little "my door is always open" or "I know who will repost this and who won't" and "Always providing a listening ear to those having a tough time".

I have an acquaintance on FB who posts them all the time. She is the most self-obsessed, selfish and rubbish listener there is. She's only posting the trite shite to make herself feel better.

Anyway. It's mental health week this week. If you're struggling, call a helpline or just tell someone you're having a tough time. In most cases it gets better.

OP posts:
The80sweregreat · 15/05/2019 18:16

They put my teeth on edge. It's always the people you would never ask for help that post this type of thing on social media!
Most people don't have the time really ; it's an uphill struggle and you would have more luck posting on mumsnet for help and advice: at least people on hear read and give some good advice or been through it themselves. These memes I just scroll on past I'm afraid.

ExhaustedGrinch · 15/05/2019 18:17

It's a way for them to show they are not ashamed and they are now honest ,after hiding it for years.

This is my experience too. After years of people being made to feel ashamed of having mental health problems, of the stigma and ridicule there are many people that now feel strong enough to talk openly about it. To create dialogue on social media rather than only discussing it in private, behind closed doors and in whispers. It's a good thing in my opinion.

ExhaustedGrinch · 15/05/2019 18:18

ManchesterBorn do you always struggle with basic comprehension skills? I know a helpline for that ...

OldUnit · 15/05/2019 18:22

Grinch has a point, I'm many cases- indeed mine- 'reaching out and telling someone' sliding into someone on facebook's DM's who has no experience whatsoever would have had no effect!

People with mental health problems aren't unintelligent, often quite the opposite. It's actually quite patronising (if well meaning) to have it trivialised to 'just reach out for a chat' in this way.

ManchesterBorn · 15/05/2019 18:23

ExhaustedGrinch

what a charm you are, does it make you feel better?

ExhaustedGrinch · 15/05/2019 18:25

ManchesterBorn Better than phoning a helpline. Did it make you feel better to deliberately misconstrue what I was saying to suit your own agenda?

ManchesterBorn · 15/05/2019 18:27

ExhaustedGrinch
you are looking for a fight and you are boring me now. I leave you to fight someone else. Smile

Smilingthroughtears · 15/05/2019 18:28

I have a friend who posts these things all the time, when I needed her and made it painfully obvious I did, she wasn’t there. In fact she said some pretty hurtful things exactly at the time I was suffering the most with mental health issues.

OldUnit · 15/05/2019 18:29

If only the man who recently took his life after the JK show or the two Love Island suicide victims had 'just reached out for a chat' to Pippa, who they hadn't seen for 15yrs since high school and had had no experience whatsoever of mental health issues but posted a trite meme, do you think they wouldn't have taken their lives?

Course they fucking would.

Mental health and suicide are complicated, often long running multi faceted issues and to suggest that the victims/sufferers would have been ok if they'd 'just reached out for a chat', is massively insulting.

Like they hadn't thought of that until fucking Pippa posted. Fuck me.

outvoid · 15/05/2019 18:31

Ha, that’s the last sort of person I’d turn to with my woes. It’s an invitation to be the topic of their gossip sesh at the next Mother’s meeting. Fuck dat.

ObvsItsNotMe · 15/05/2019 18:35

Tell you what, why not let the people who want to post the memes post them, and the people who want to ignore them ignore them. Just like we all do every day with tons of other stuff we think is "shit " on FB every day.

GarnierBBCream · 15/05/2019 18:39

YANBU. 'Just reach out!' a lot of times people who are this sick can't fucking 'reach out'. And the talking. I have mental health issues caused by situation/circumstance which only a great deal of money and support, neither of which is forthcoming, would make any real difference in my quality of life. I could 'talk' from now until the world ends, it will make FA difference.

formerbabe · 15/05/2019 18:39

The only person I know who does this is the biggest bitch ever...a thoroughly nasty person who wouldn't spit on you if you were on fire. The irony never escapes me.

DizzyPigeon · 15/05/2019 18:40

A friend posted one recently that said it needs to be normal to go to a counsellor or therapist when feeling sad or overwhelmed, and that would help take away the stigma of mental health issues.

Feeling sad or overwhelmed aren't mental health issues they are just normal emotions! That kinda shit feeds the 'oh just smile and go for a walk and you'll feel better' brigade. Grrrr.

MintyCedric · 15/05/2019 18:44

Dyrne do you work in a school by any chance?

My workplace seems to think an annual wellbeing day where you can attend a half hour yoga class and get your BP taken, and doughnuts in the staff room once a term is all that's needed to ensure staff wellbeing and moral!

MintyCedric · 15/05/2019 18:45

Flowers Garnier

I know the feeling Sad

Lovestonap · 15/05/2019 18:54

I work in mental health, and I don't mind the more useful posts, ones containing support line numbers or websites, or ones with good advice. I don't like the 'I bet I know who won't copy and paste' crap. Emotional blackmail and shaming is not the key to good mental health.

MsMarvellous · 15/05/2019 18:54

You're right. I don't post this gubbins. But if I think you need me I'm there. X

ssd · 15/05/2019 19:00

Normal to go to a therapist or counsellor... Really???
I went to one, cost me £45 for 50 mins, had to stop going as was skint.
Not everyone has private health care or a good job where it comes as a package.
If I'd seen that meme I'd have been Angry

Dominiom · 15/05/2019 19:10

They drive me absolutely bonkers. My so called best friend posts then daily, ironically when I asked for real life support through a particularly shitty time she couldn't be seen for dust. hypocrite!

RedSheep73 · 15/05/2019 19:17

They drive me mad too...I lost my sister to suicide, and it wasn't for lack of her asking for help. It was because the doctors have no idea how to help. The idea that there's an easy solution is maddening.

But generally, any post that is copied and pasted or asks you to repost or claims that they'll know who their friends are should be ignored. It's like a chain letter - just stop passing it on.

darkriver19886 · 15/05/2019 19:34

Ynbu my family post this bollox all the time. Yet when I need them I can't find them for dust. I reason that people mean well but my mental illness has most train professionals running for the hills so why would I turn to people on Facebook.

lolaflores · 15/05/2019 20:02

Ph yes. Bi polar over here. Have had loads of ups and downs. Messy old business all in all but my family chose to largely ignore it....unless it's some limp meme on FB.
I let them have that, if it makes them feel like they're helping. I just have a dry chuckle to myself and resume the daily grind.

theboomtownrat · 15/05/2019 20:19

Yanbu
I work with a woman who posts shit like this all the time. I wouldn't talk to her in my hour of need if my life depended on it. She is horrible

thesnapandfartisinfallible · 15/05/2019 20:21

I fucking hate these. The people who repost them are always the same ones, you know who say "Call me if you need to talk" but then if you do try and tell them you're struggling they can't get away fast enough.