In a fit of pique...

[PookieDo]

What is your most irrational moment? Or are you cool and collected?

I have just came home from work and shopping and DC were doing nothing. I have bad period pains and a backache and DD16 had left school her school shoes slap bang in the middle of the kitchen floor. They are black and the floor is black and I had shopping bags and tripped on them

I threw them into the middle of the lawn in my fit of pique

It is not that I am OCD tidy but middle of the kitchen floor?!

I did pick them up so she never knew

I'm one of those generally cheery, chilled out, patient people, but when my limit is occasionally reached every few years, you know it...

At junior school it was rounders season. I have never understood the purpose of rounders as a form of exercise. You either stand in a corner of the field and pick daisies or sit on a bench until it's your turn to have a hard projectile launched at you, whereupon you duck and stagger to first post and are declared out and have to return to the bench. On this particular occasion, my very recently ex-best friend was on first post and got great joy at chanting "Out! Out! Out!". I saw red... I raised the rounders bat up and slammed it to the ground, I bent down, picked it up up, slammed it down again, picked it up and found myself dangling from the end of my arm being escorted to the headmaster's office where I recieved a hearty bellowing and spitting session.
I was quite restrained that I hadn't lobbed the bat at the offending ex-best friend... although my aim is so shit, it's generally safest to be my target

I had form... I dumped the fucking skipping rope in the skipping race on sports day in front of the whole school a few years earlier. I couldn't bloody skip and the rest of the girls were finishing the race already and there I was 3 paces away from the start repeatedly tripping over the sodding rope. I stomped off to the finish line and the bastarding teachers sent me back to the start to collect the fucking rope.

How I never launched the HP printer through a window, I do not know. It was whinging that it couldn't possibly print in black because it was out of blue... I traipse off to Staples and buy the offending blue cartridge and install it. Then the fucker moans that it's out of fucking black!
My Kodak printer is much more amenable

Meh!

You picked them up, rookie mistake.

She would have needed them before you did. Don’t moan about your child being slovenly then pick up after her, she learns nothing from that.

My step daughter took to leaving her shoes in the lounge (no shoes allowed on the carpet etc) so I hid them. Next day as she is ready to leave for school, she couldn’t find her shoes, not my problem. I’d hidden them, she had to find them. She didn’t dump them in the middle of the lounge again after the third time I hid them as I wouldn’t give them to her that time.

Yanbu.

Not really, thegreatcrestednewt? Why is he any different to any of the other frustrated pp's who have kicked out at or smashed an inanimate object when it has thwarted them? Do you mean because he's a man?

Oh god I'm a vengeful bitch. I've replaced glass from a slammed porch door and the beeper battery thing in my dads keys after I kicked the front door in a frenzy and they fell in the way. Ripping the slidey door off its hinges on the car because I was fucked off at the orthodontist was probably the pinnacle of my teenage rage though.

As an adult... Royal Mail lost a very pricey textbook I was trying to flog, told me the various tracking extras I'd paid for entitled me to diddly squat & sent a book of 1st class stamps (which no where near covered the cost,) as an apology. I was a student and could not afford to be £65 out of pocket, so I ripped the stamps up in fury and binned the scraps and rang Royal Mail and told them v sweetly that they were incompetent fuckwits and that their compensation was so insultingly pathetic that it wasn't even fit to line the cats litter tray. Then I thanked the call handler for listening and put the phone down.

I was about 14 and going through an absolutely vile phase. My lunch had been put in front of me and I was showing off about something and refused to eat it. My poor mother was so exasperated with me she came up behind me, put her hand on the back of my head and shoved my face into a plateful of corned beef and mashed potato. I remember coming up crying with a faceful of corned beef and mash. I must have really driven her to the end of her tether though as she was normally so kind and loving. I forgave her though. 😂. I wasn’t psychologically damaged and we laughed about it many times over the years.

I remember throwing a quiche against the back wall of the oven when I was making it from scratch - I forget why. Awful to clean up.

But the famous one in our house is the time DH & I played Risk. As there were only two of us, my two teddy bears stood in as dummy players. I was losing, not only to DH but to both bears when I lost it & hit the board, sending pieces flying everywhere. Losing to stuffed toys was just too much for me.

Just yesterday the toilet roll wouldn't come away properly and the holder had just fallen over. I fling the toilet roll across the room in exasperation.

why is he any different to any of the other frustrated pp's who have kicked out at or smashed an inanimate object when it has thwarted them? Do you mean because he's a man?

No, not beause he's a man.

Because of the number of times he has done it.

Don't you mind him smashing things up?

I once threw all DH's chess pieces out of an upstairs window.

He had this electronic chess game, it was when DD1 was a toddler and he hadn't yet caught on that parenting was the equal responsibility of both of us. I'd asked him to help for the umpteenth time and been told "in a minute" because of the damn chess computer he was obsessed with. I picked it up and flung all the pieces out of the window into the garden.

It did hit home that I was really quite at the end of my tether and things were much better after that. After that he had to use a matchstick instead of one of the lost pieces, until he found it gardening 5 years later.

I have;

Thrown my mobile phone at the wall after a phone argument with dh. It survived thankfully.

Tossed a bowl of coco pops at the wall when I was frustrated over the state of the kitchen (yeah, I know! It was a bitch to clean up)

And the reason we had a large chip out of the worktop in front of the sink was because instead of taking my upset and frustration out on anyone else, I had a frying pan to hand and repeatedly smashed it on the edge of the worktop until I felt better 😳. The frying pan was fine once I hammered it back into shape and still gets used.

Chucked all my clothes out of the wardrobe and refused to go out to meet friends because I had "nothing to wear".

I am terrible for reaching boiling point and try very hard not to lose my temper these days.

I once kicked a huge hole in a giant box of soap powder. It was that or kick DH. I was at the end of my tether. Soap powder everywhere. The shame!

I'm facing another night of my 4 year old screaming about being scared of everything in his room (he's not, he just wants to sit downstairs till midnight) so I've just totally lost all of my shit and thrown absolutely everything manageable in his room out of the door.

DH forgot to turn off his early morning work alarm for 2 weekends in a row. When it happened a 3rd time, I launched the alarm clock out of the bedroom window. It landed on the flat roof of the kitchen.
For the last 2 nights his mobile phone has been vibrating in the middle of the night as and when he's got a notification. It makes a racket on his bedside table and wakes me up whilst he carries on sleeping. He's on a warning.

I threw our brand new tomtom out of the car window, whilst driving, because it wouldn't stop beeping.

Was pregnant so DH didn't shout at me but would do it again, stupid ducking thing.--

Bwekfusth Your post reminded me of a winters evening when my four year old very stubborn daughter decided she couldn't remember what she had to say when she wanted to get down from the table (please may I leave the table). I was equally as stubborn, and said to her "Well you'll have to sit there until you do remember, if it takes all night". About an hour later, she said "I'm going to still be sitting here when you've gone to bed, aren't I , Mummy?" So I said "Yes you are, because I'm going to bed now. Night Night!". She'd obviously thought it would be lovely, TV, lights, etc., on. I stood up, switched everything off and started to walk out of the room . She said the quickest "PleasemayIleavethetable" I'd ever heard!

When my sister told me to close the door I didn't open I slammed it shut. My hand went through the glass and cut my arm. The neighbour had to take me to hospital.

My brother wouldn't shut the curtain properly so I pulled it and ended up pulling the rail off the wall. We blamed the budgie!

My brother called me fat & greedy because I was having some toast. I threw the bread at him and stomped off. My mam asked what had happened to all the bread and he said it fell off the counter. "I don't know why," he said, "it just... fell off!"

My DVD player wouldn't recognise the disk. It kept saying it couldn't find it. I took the disk out of the player and showed it to it, shouting, "Here's the fucking disk!" and then took it outside and jumped up & down on it, smashing it to smithereens and calling it a useless fucking bastard. Local teens looked at me like and I just yelled, "What the fuck are you looking at?!"

When I was around 19 I had one of the rudest, nastiest bosses I've ever had. One day she was screaming in my face and I grabbed the nearby cleaners mop bucket and launched the contents over her before walking out.

Thrown every bit of crockery against the kitchen wall when my husband left the washing up after the evening meal yet again, until he returned home from work the following evening. I had a new born and was on my knees with tiredness, so he was supposed to do the washing up after the evening meal. I distinctly remember screaming that he wouldn't have to fucking worry about the bastard pots anymore.

A few years later we had an integrated dishwasher, but the outer door, no matter how many times we fixed it on, kept dropping off. One morning it fell off straight onto my bare toes. Howling I grabbed it and launched it across the kitchen......straight through the glass in the back door!

• Disclaimer. I don't suffer insanity, I enjoy it.

These will out me if any of my family are on here, but here goes.

I'm terrible for flinging things around or kicking them if I get cross. Usually not hard, or at anyone, but DS knows when Mum starts throwing things, shes getting pissed off. Yesterday it was his bastarding pair of compasses - he has lost the nice metal pair from his Oxford maths set, so he had this crummy pair of plastic ones and couldn't work them so drafted me in. The point wasnt sharp enough to stay in the paper, and every time you tried to spin it the hinge was loose, so the other leg would spin out and you'd get some sort of demented spiral. It was launched across the living room, then I needed to try again, so had to maintain composure and ask him nicely to retrieve it. I will be getting him a new metal pair on Saturday.

Anyway, that's all guff, years ago my ex came to pick DS up for contact. Ex was abusive and I'd left him after he threatened to kill me. So he turns up and starts in on me, culminating in telling me he'll take me to court for custody and he'll get it because I don't feed DS enough vegetables. I saw red and told him I'd show him bloody vegetables, and threw a bag of frozen broccoli at him. It missed, and he swept out of the house with DS, saying he wasn't bringing him back because I was clearly abusive. Naturally I then had to call the police and told them everything, including how I was abusive. The WPC replied that he deserved the veg to hit him.

Obviously DS came home safely, and is now a teenager. I also employ the "everything in his bed" method when it's bad. I've also been known to walk in to his room in the middle of the night to dump collected up junk of his from around the house onto the middle of his floor. Sometimes he wakes, other times wakes up to it, but it usually works for a while.

Best one though was DF. He was trying to fix the dishwasher and it wasnt working. So he slammed it shut, shouted "You stuuuuupid thing!" at it and gave it a good hard kick, all extremely out of character. The dishwasher whirred back into life and lasted a good few more years.

I have a small dent in the washing machine door, dh has had to fix the catch on the tumble dryer door, the catch that holds the hoover pipe to the hoover has long been smashed off, there’s a chip out of the wooden door over the dishwasher and a mark on the toilet wall where I thumped it. I’m not awfully keen on housework and if the domestic appliances play me up I’m afraid the pique gets let loose.

We once had a non-uniform day where the kids had to take in a donation of chocolate for a chocolate tombola at the school fete. I went to grab the chocolate as we left for school and the little sods had eaten it. Two lovely bars of nice chocolate. I was so furious I made them go upstairs and change into school uniform. All the way to school parents were slowing down in their cars and yelling ‘it’s non-uniform today!’ I did feel bad but they did learn not to to steal stuff ever again.

I threw our brand new tomtom out of the car window, whilst driving, because it wouldn't stop beeping.

DH broke the screen of our tomtom by jabbing it hard in a rage because it wouldn't tell him which exit off a roundabout. He apparently went round the roundabout three times waiting for it to kick into action, then lost his temper with it.

I wasn't wildly impressed but thought it might be prudent to replace it with a Garmin. Which seems to have so far survived.

My mum fucked up the Yule log recipe one Christmas and lobbed it out the back door onto the patio. It sat there for several days.

My mum locked my dad in the back garden one Sunday morning after a row. Dad got a hammer from the garage and smashed the glass in the back door, let himself back in and calmly told my mum never to lock him out of his own house again

I smashed the dirty dishes all over the patio because Dh complained about how they were stacked in the sink. I then told him we didn't have to concern ourselves with them again

Our first sat nav was called Sonya - because, according to dh, she gets Sonya nerves!

Remembered another one
Outside a pub waiting for a taxi when an obviously very drunk man tried to get in his car

I snatched the keys out of his hand and dropped them down the nearest grate

He looked very confused, then angry. Thankfully my taxi turned up and I left pretty sharpish

Wow - some great posts on here (and some slightly concerning ones).

I do tend to keep my cool, but have done a couple of things.... I once emptied my daughters room of everything but her bed, and told her to put it all back - tidily. Hasn't worked, she still lives in a shithole.

But, she does now put her school blazer in the correct place every day. She was warned that leaving it anywhere else would result in it being hidden. She did, it was, and she spent a very frustrating and upsetting 30 minutes looking for it before I gave it back. Hasn't done it since.

I have OCD and one of my triggers is foodwaste. OH keeps moving the tub around, meaning I have to move it to cook. My hands are currently worn and cracked and nasty, from repeated washing of them. Two days ago I got really upset and wrote on the wall with marker. Hopefully the pic shows up for you.

By the way, I've been victim to repeated incidents some of you have posted up as funny. Just putting myself in the "been abused by having large heavy cooking items thrown at my head" camp.