Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To adopt an 11 year old dog?

276 replies

ReasonablyIntelligent · 14/05/2019 12:01

I'm finally returning to the UK after having spent almost 4 years working away across various countries.

I have always been utterly desperate for a dog, I've had Border Collies before and love them.

I have my own business now so DP and I will both be working from home, we're financially stable so I think we're in a good place.
Only slight niggle is that we talked about doing some travelling, which we couldn't with a dog.

I always expected to get a puppy when we were ready, but I've been keeping my eye on the local dog shelters and have fallen in love with an 11 year old border collie at our nearest one. (not actually met her tho)

I love the idea of rehoming a dog, particularly one who may be struggling to find a home (at a guess her age may be putting people off).
However I've some concerns about rescue collies in general (I've had one and he was so damaged, bless him. Border Collies are high needs and it can go bad when those needs aren't met).
Also, an 11 year old Collie only has 3-4 years left - so I'd be setting myself up for heartbreak really very soon (I know that's really selfish).
On the other side (and I'm aware this is an awful thing to think), she'd be lower commitment than a puppy time wise.

Im not concerned about supporting her through old age, we have the time and money.

AIBU to consider it with such reservations? Is there any factors I've not thought of?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
19
MatildaTheCat · 14/05/2019 14:53

She lovely but don’t fall in love with a dog you’ve never met. You need lots of information about her previous life, health and general fitness.

I know someone who adopted two dogs aged 12 which was an amazing thing to do but the reality was that both were ill and traumatised and she had 2/3 years of heartache, enormous vet bills and bereavement. That’s an enormous commitment.

My own boy is 10 and has tons of life in him but is definitely getting slower and grumpier.

Just proceed with caution. She does indeed look adorable.

Catchingbentcoppers · 14/05/2019 14:56

Send your DP, don't lose her! We adopted a 10 year old Heinz 57 and he was the most marvelous dog. We had him for 5 years and I loved him for every single second. In fact I feel tearful even thinking about him now. I'm so grateful we had his last years with him.

Nearlythere1 · 14/05/2019 14:57

Omg go for it please! She is so gorgeous and I love older doggies!

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 14/05/2019 14:58

Definitely adopt! Poor girl must be lost without her previous owner.

My boss recently took on a dog after one of his neighbours died; he's an old spaniel, deaf as a post and now spends his days pottering around the office and being petted by everyone (and we take turns walking him).

Greyhound22 · 14/05/2019 15:00

Oh OP I just had a tear in my eye when I saw her and I lost my bc 15 years ago. Go and get her 😭

Greyhound22 · 14/05/2019 15:02

My DDog is 11.5 now also - he was nearly 6 when I adopted him. I wouldn't go back to having a puppy again. My bc was relatively young when we lost him (12) but they are a breed that can make a good age so you could have 5 years with her yet.

Sup3rCooper · 14/05/2019 15:06

I wouldn't write her off as being lower energy due to her age! Some collies don't get the memo re this and there's no reason really why she won't still be up for agility unless you're told she's slowed down a bit.

coffeeaddiction · 14/05/2019 15:12

I did this , adopted a 12year old that had previously had a tumour removed , we only had her for 6 months before she became very ill but I'm so glad we did .
She had the best 6 months of her life and she enriched our lives too !

She picked us rather than we picked her though , we just knew she was ours as soon as we saw her

Original poster
ReasonablyIntelligent · 14/05/2019 15:12

She lovely but don’t fall in love with a dog you’ve never met.

Solid advice. The current plan is to send DP in to make enquiries, for him to meet her and we'll go from there.

If the rescue think she's suitable (its the RSPCA - I would like to think they're thorough) and DP gets on with her, we'll pay our deposit and reserve her. In the meantime, the RSPCA can do their home check and I can meet her the day I come back (which is only in 12 days time)

The worst case is that she and I don't get on when I've met her (highly unlikely!) and we've needlessly placed £50 deposit - but its a charity so I don't mind.

Lifetime insurance is £14 a month for her, which is no problem.

OP posts:
Fivebyfivesq · 14/05/2019 16:04

Do it! Our dog was ‘ten’ when we adopted him six years ago but they seem to have got that wrong - he’s a spring chicken and gives us so much joy!

florriepeck · 14/05/2019 16:46

Would love to hear a happy ending to this (I have a nearly 14 year old rescue collie cross, and DH and I love him to bits).

MIA12 · 14/05/2019 16:53

Place marking for a hopefully happy ending. She’s gorgeous OP and you’d be doing a wonderful thing! We had a BC who lived til 16 so she could have plenty more years ahead yet, but will be overlooked by many people.

AvocadosBeforeMortgages · 14/05/2019 20:16

From what you've said, it sounds like a great idea.

Anecdotally, dogs that come into rescue due to bereavement are fairly reliably nice dogs.

You must post an update to this thread Wink

On a side note, £14/month for lifetime pet insurance is very cheap for an older dog. Which company are you looking at? Some of them are notorious for wriggling out of paying up (Animal Friends, for instance) whereas others are much better (PetPlan, for instance)

labazsisgoingmad · 14/05/2019 20:24

its worth mentioning if there are any known health conditions often the charity will pay the vets bills the charity i work for certainly does. lots of older dogs do come into the rescues due to someone dying going in a home or just not being able to cope any more. no one can tell how long a dog will live for but however long they will have had the best senior years if they are adopted but sadly so many walk past them

thecatsthecats · 14/05/2019 20:31

I've got one of my 16yo cats that I adopted age 14yo draped over me right now.

It's so rewarding to know that these adorable, loving creatures get somewhere safe and caring for their old age (their owner had to go into a care home and it makes me well up to think how heartbroken they must have been to give them up - the cat shelter managed to get the message back that they'd been adopted). At the other end of the spectrum, I also understand the relief of knowing that we won't have a 20y commitment.

Original poster
ReasonablyIntelligent · 15/05/2019 09:52

DP is going to visit her today! 1pm!

I'm dying to come home anyway (I'm having a horrendous time at work and it's taking a big toll on my already heavily-medicated anxiety) but now I'm clawing at the walls, I wish I could go and see her.

OP posts:
Mayalready · 15/05/2019 10:26

How much is your dh likely to hold back? Is their a possibility you return home and your marital bed is full...??

GreigLaidlawsbarofsoap · 15/05/2019 10:36

Oh she looks like such a sweetheart, such kind eyes. I think it's a brilliant thing to do. I grew up with dogs but DH wasn't too sure. We compromised and got an "older" rescue boy as our first dog and he gave us 6 years of love until he passed aged 13, much longer than the initial expectation!

DH now totally converted and we have our second rescue! Smile

Trottersindependenttraders · 15/05/2019 10:42

Keep us updated op. I am watching with interest as we are at the beginnings of thinking / planning for a rescue dog and we would like an oldie.

I hope the next 12 days goes quickly for you, there's nothing worse than being so far from home and being desperate to get home.

Nesssie · 15/05/2019 10:45

Practicalities to think about:

Toileting- Older dogs often can't hold their bladders for very long, so you will need to make arrangements for letting her out often, and perhaps expecting a few accidents

Insurance - Tends to be more expensive for older dogs

Ingrained habits - you can teach an old dog new tricks but it may be harder if they've practised the habit for 10+years

Heartbreak - You won't have as long with her as a puppy/younger dog

However, I think its a lovely idea and you will have given an older dog the best ending she could hope for, full of love and happiness.
I've done end of life fostering and it is devastating every single time but I take comfort in the fact that I have given them a wonderful couple of months/years.

TeddybearBaby · 15/05/2019 10:48

You’re already one day down op. It’ll fly by. What a nice thread. Good luck x

HoppityChicken · 15/05/2019 10:56

It would be a lovely thing to do for you and the dog, espcially as you've got BC experience! If the shelter has a robust rehoming process they should be able to assess if it's a good match, all things considered. The last thing they want it someone taking a dog that they end up bringing back or keeping the dog with regrets so just be really up front with them about any reservations. If the timing's not right there'll be other dogs and they should be able to keep you on file. (I hope you take her!)

Original poster
ReasonablyIntelligent · 15/05/2019 11:13

How much is your dh likely to hold back? Is their a possibility you return home and your marital bed is full...??

He's never had a dog before so he's really nervous. He's nervous that the RSPCA people are going to judge him about knowing loads about dogs (he's very good with them and they LOVE him), so I think he's unlikely to go "ADOPT ALL THE PUPPERS!" like i would

He's also concerned about the house as the carpets are being replaced so it looks really scruffy at the moment.

OP posts:
Original poster
ReasonablyIntelligent · 15/05/2019 11:15

*about NOT knowing loads about dogs

OP posts:
HoppityChicken · 15/05/2019 11:26

They won't be worried about it looking scruffy with the carpets being replaced. They'd probably only be worried if there was a schedule of major home improvements taking place that would be disturbing for the dog if/when you took it home. The fact you two both work from home are huge plus points, for any dog, not enough of those homes about!