To commit murder for asking questions before I open my eyes?

[Pinkginxx]

General light-hearted disclaimer.

So I must have moved at some point this morning. DP (no kids so all the time in the world) had a conversation that went like this:

Him: 'morning beautiful'
Me: 'urgh'
Him: 'did you sleep ok?
Me 'urgh'
Him: 'You didn't?'
Me: 'Urgh fine.'
Him: 'Are you too warm?'
Me: ' urgh fine'
Him: 'What was that? Are you ok?'
Me: 'grumble grumble fine sleepy'.
Him: Shall I make you a cup of tea?
Me: 'No sleepy'
Him: 'Do you want a cold drink?'
Me: Pretends to be asleep
Him: What shall we do for breakfast?'
Me: Pretends to be asleep
Him: Shall we go here?
Me: Dont mind
Him: I'll get in the shower first then if you need a bit more sleep
Me: Internally yes I fucking do!
Me: Externally Urgh

Now I know it come from a good place, but seriously it's 8 in the morning, my eyelid has twitched, and for the love of god be quiet!

My husband does this too, it's so frustrating! Or he will tell me things I need to remember later in the day, then gets frustrated when I don't remember

I have threatened to bury him under the decking multiple times if he keeps it up.

Yep, totally sympathise with you!

I need coffee before I can have any kind of sensible, human conversation!

Yep. Have told him many times to not talk to me first thing and yet he persists. Why?!

Omg my partner used to do this. Before kids! He'd wake me up with a cuppa pretending to be nice but in actual fact he just wanted me up and awake!

Oh no I'm your partner/husband!

When I'm awake I'm awake and it's boring when you want your dh's company but they're selfish enough to be asleep or too tired to get up!

😱 YANBU. I can’t even form words until halfway down a coffee. Chirpy conversation = NOPE.

My DH is like this; I’m normally more blunt tho telling him to be quiet

After 20 years my OH has learnt not to engage with me on the morning

Ahh he sounds nice. But, yes, I'd kill him too.

You can borrow my patio if you want. We can bury him next to Mr Bunz who knows I’m a light sleeper and loudly gets dressed so I will wake up and go to breakfast with him.

I'm that person. I try so, so hard not to wake DH and be all "mooooorning" pre-8am on weekends but it kills me not to chat to him from the second my eyes open.

DS1 is like DH, DS2 is like me. We get up early some days and bounce on the trampoline together (we're detached so the neighbours can't hear us) just because we're so full of beans/joy that it helps others not kill us.

My DF was a very early riser and hated being the only one up.

He was clever, he made an amazing cooked breakfast then banged on everyone's bedroom doors at 7am Sunday morning.... EVERY sunday morning!! Bloody worked tho 😂

If dh wakes first I say - eh well nice to have you but see you!!
And he gets up!!
Every time!!

DP used to do this. A 'fuck off! Sleeping!' after the third uurggh a few times cured him of it.

I now just say “shhhh I’m chasing my dream” and get left alone.

I get up really early and enjoy my mornings, but tbh I enjoy the solace so I don't understand those early risers who insist on their partners joining in

Even on a Sunday I am up well before 8.