To hate sounding posh, when I'm not

[privacysettingstalk]

I am quite well spoken, and people pick up on it. They often think I'm privileged, went to a very good school, come from a "good family" if you see what I mean.

I do not.

I was born in a pretty dodgey part of Glasgow to teacher parents. I did bag myself a place at Oxbridge which is where I think it developed. But now, back home nobody believes that I am "one of them".
I feel like I have betrayed my own working class roots by sounding posh.

Most people slip back into their childhood accent when they go back home. I think it's unusual not to.

Sorry, not much help.

Do you want to associate with people who are shallow enough to judge you on your accent?

I'm the same. Just own it. Fuck em if they think you're something your not.

Same here! Came from a very working class background, all my siblings had very strong Bristolian accents and we were quite often asked "why does she sound like that?"
I worked in the USA as a young adult, lots of people were convinced that everyone from Britain had a BBC accent and I didn't really have a leg to stand on when telling them otherwise!

I have this to OP. No idea why. I've no advice but lots of sympathy

I’m the same except I’d have placed a child of two teachers firmly in middle class territory.

I’m even more proudly working class for being mistaken as otherwise. And having parents who were unsupportive, mostly as they were unable - they were unwell/not educated enough themselves.

I’m the same except I’d have placed a child of two teachers firmly in middle class territory.

I’m even more proudly working class for being mistaken as otherwise. And having parents who were unsupportive, mostly as they were unable - they were unwell/not educated enough themselves.

Scottish scheme wean 1st in family to go to uni,I don’t sound posh but my accent has softened compared to my family, folk I grew up with. I don’t feel I’ve compromised or sold on on wc roots.

Have worked and lived around uk so inevitably accent has changed
I am obviously Scottish though,obvious as soon as I talk.
The accent had actually been good for talking to all folk,all socioeconomic classes. And not being posh I’m not embedded in that class system,where did one go to school?what do ones parents do?

Same here. Used to really annoy me but not anymore. There are advantages to people not being able to guess your background.

I was brought up in Cheshire and have a very mild northern accent but now I work in Bolton (think Peter Kay and Paddy McGuinness) my accent sticks out like a sore thumb and I get told I sound posh all the time

Just booked myself on the “ Parliamo Glasgow “ summer school programme

So what if you do? Can you imagine the reaction from posters here if someone posted worrying that they sounded like they were "from a low-income background", but quite determined to prove that they weren't?

Does this only happen in the UK?

I got this too in Scotland growing up...got teased and bullied for sounding like a 'snob'- not really but moved from the Highlands- and a 'choochter'. It's fine down south where I live now. They like my soft Scottish accent. But my friends home in Scotland think I sound English now. The Scots do not like the English accent I find. I can't be bothered with it now, feels like inverse snobbery to me, and I'm glad I moved away.

I grew up in Glasgow but moved down south for work in my late teens. The Southerners didn’t understand my broad Weegie accent so I had to soften it. I never returned to Scotland, so my accent now is what my mother would describe as “posh”. There’s nothing you can do about it as it’s a product of where you have been!

But you are privileged.

You were privileged enough to go to an Oxbridge school where you achieved world-class education but you're upset because you want to sound working class so the locals know had a normal upbringing? What a strange thing to be upset about.

It's not strange when you don;t feel accepted and have been bullied for it. maybe people don't understand unless have had this themselves. It can make you feel like an outsider.

@user Eh, I come from an impoverished East London borough and sound like I holiday in the Cotswolds. All I ever hear when discussing where I come from is 'you don't sound like you're from there' and yes it can be annoying, but I don't wish that people knew that I had some struggled growing up and cling on to others regarding me as poor like them. I didnt acquire my posh accent though attending an Oxbridge uni either.

@privacysettingstalk, I hear you OP. Born and raised in a rough area in newcastle to a dirt poor (happy) working class family and have a very soft Geordie accent that comes out when I'm angry or excited. The rest of the time according to my family I sound like I was born with a silver spoon stuck up my arse. I'm studying in York and the majority of my friends are either very southern or very middle class (one of them lives in a castle, several went to Eton or various other ridiculously posh boarding and single sex schools) so I've clearly picked up some of their accent and they've done the same. But I've never had a strong accent like the rest of my family and home friends. I do however talk very fast like most geordies and use a lot of the same slang and my uni friends struggle to understand that. But I hate going home because there is always comments made on the way I speak (both my accent and vocabulary) and I hate it. Makes me feel like an alien.

I have this too. I'm a Geordie and have lived in Hampshire for 23 years. You'd never know I'd spent half my life oop north!!

I have a very good speaking voice and no regional accent. When I lived in London, people assumed I was privately educated. I have no education to speak of. Being back home, people are very rude about it. People at work who know the area I grew up in, blatantly take the piss and if people don't know the area, it will be pointed out that I must have had eloquention lessons.

The other draw back is the mistrust I experience locally with friends of my friends and family, like I'm a plant or an alien or something.

I ended up at a very posh boarding school because my dad worked abroad and there was no suitable school there. The most I ever face down south here is having to explain this when I mention that I'm from Aberdeen. I have all the vocab and grammar for broad Doric, I just don't have the accent; I still understand it better than broad Fife even after 30 years down south here.

It doesn't bother me and it doesn't seem to bother any one else. Can you soften your Oxbridge accent slightly and merge it to sound more 'educated Scots'? I can understand that you wouldn't want to sound like Michael Gove who deliberately dumped his accent so as not to admit to being an Aberdeen loon.

For those of us who live in the British Isles this is unfortunately unlikely to go away. This country has a weird fixation with social class that leaves my continental, American and Canadian friends and colleagues bemused and scratching their heads. People judge on the basis of accent, given names, car badges and postcodes, and you've only got to look at the depressing 'royal' threads to see how hung up some people are on those they perceive to be their social 'betters'. It's one of the things that is certainly less progressive about living in Britain rather than other developed, progressive nations.

To the poster who wrote:

confused Does this only happen in the UK?

I'd say no, it's not just us. But unfortunately it's a prominent trait in Britain, where 'forgetting where you came from' is considered the definitive cardinal sin.

If you're living back home surely your accent will return to what it was before you left? I understand an accent changing slightly but I'm always a bit when people move as adults and their accent completely changes. I don't understand how? Your accent is such a huge part of you and your identity - how does it just morph into a completely different one after a couple of years in Oxford?

I spent 13 years living abroad and picked up some slang/would say the odd word in the accent of the host country etc but my accent more or less remained the same? I literally can't understand how this happens? It always happens to a certain type of person in my experience...

My mother was in South Africa for a couple of years; around 40 years later, someone picked up a couple of SA vowels and asked if that was where she was from. Some people just do it automatically.