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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask what you would do?

22 replies

LittleDove1 · 11/05/2019 20:17

I've been very unhappy in my job for a while, with terrible stress and anxiety. It's a weird office culture and I don't fit in. I've been close to quitting or being signed off sick.

I have been offered a new job which sounds great, and I should be jumping for joy, but while I hate my situation, I also fear change. I wondered what you would do, considering the following things?

Current job

Long 3 month notice period, giving an element of job security
26 days holiday
37 hours a week
free tea, coffee, snacks
but no sick pay
Standard Monday to Friday, no weekends
no car park, so I have to pay to park or park further away and walk about 15 minutes

New job

pays £2k more than current job
but is 40 hours a week
20 days holiday
3 miles further than current job (by car)
pays full sick pay for 6 months
Will need to work weekends sometimes
Free parking

I should stress the new job sounds really good and interesting and I think I would enjoy it. So I wondered if others would go for the second job considering all these things, I guess I just want reassurance I'm doing the right thing.

OP posts:

LongWalkShortPlank · 11/05/2019 20:25

You don't like your current job, take the new one and run!

Chocolate35 · 11/05/2019 20:26

New one all day long!

drquin · 11/05/2019 20:26

You're probably going to have to go with gut instinct & fluffier feelings.

You can compare some of the points and see if they're financially better or not. Eg £2k a year more sounds great, but isn't a huge amount by the time you're taxed, divided by 12 for a monthly amount, then eaten up by the extra 2.5 hrs per week you've to work.
Same goes for annual leave, travel costs etc.

But sometimes what's "better" for you isn't so easily quantifiable.

CanIBeOnHolidayPlease · 11/05/2019 20:26

I was going to say new job until I read about the annual leave. Losing 6 days of annual leave is quite significant.

CanIBeOnHolidayPlease · 11/05/2019 20:30

but then if days at work are more enjoyable it could be worth it

BlueMerchant · 11/05/2019 20:31

Definitely new job. You are saying you aren't happy and don't fit in in your current job. It's causing you stress and anxiety.
You are in a great position to make positive changes..GO

SimonJT · 11/05/2019 20:35

New job.

I worked for a company I hated, it really worsened by mental health and caused a replase of an eating disorder. I moved to another company, less pay, more hours, less holiday etc. But, I really enjoy working for my current company and I genuinely don’t get at all stressed about work.

pitterpatterbaby · 11/05/2019 20:38

Will your leave entitlement increase once you've been in post a while? I'd ask.

Stylemebabyonemoretime · 11/05/2019 20:42

New job! Definitely ask about leave entitlement increasing and negotiate increase now.

Rystall · 11/05/2019 20:44

New job all the way! Take it! Don’t look back. You’re caught in a trap at the moment but you just don’t see it. I guarantee you’ll never look back. You’ve nothing to lose... go for it. And congratulations!!!

GoldenBee · 11/05/2019 20:46

New job gets my vote given how unhappy you sound in your current job.

Cottonwoolmouth · 11/05/2019 20:48

Oh you are very similar to my best friend.

Her health was getting really bad due to stress and she had so many family financial commitments she was too scared to jump. Long leaving notice too.

After five years of me saying ‘you gotta leave before it kills you’ she finally found a great job. And she bit the bullet. She was also scared to leave them in the shit.

She finally jumped and is two months in to her new role. She is still finding her feet but so happy she did it.

Go for it!

CarolsBiggestFan · 11/05/2019 20:58

By the time you’ve worked the extra hours and lost 6 days annual leave you’ve effectively taken a pay cut.

And sometimes that grass isn’t greener, if you’re prone to anxiety and stress it may be a case of same shit different workplace or even different shit different workplace.

But you’ll never know unless you go, so if it were me I’d go for the new job.

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 11/05/2019 21:42

Your situation in your current job is not going to get better. You could stick it out and then end up on long term sick leave and/or in performance management, at which point your employment prospects may not be as good.

Instead you have an opportunity to leave on your terms. You are in the extremely lucky position of having a new job to go to. Grab it with both hands.

And well done!

vintagesewingmachine · 11/05/2019 21:45

Go, go, go! The new one is better by a mile. Your current job will never get better and you hate it. Good luck!

MrsZola · 11/05/2019 21:52

Don't be frightened of the change. I was in my previous job for 26 years - stayed that long for lots of reasons. I was happy until the last couple of years - new boss, change of culture etc. I stayed longer then I should have once things changed - ended up pretty ill. I was so scared of the change involved in a new job - it was nerve wracking, but I'm so happy now.
So run towards that new job, it will make you happier then the old one.

ImNotHappyaboutitPauline · 11/05/2019 21:52

You would actually be pretty much taking a pay cut if you take the new job so that's something to bear in mind. Is it possible to negotiate with the potential new employer on salary and leave? Were you actively looking and if so is there the possibility of other jobs in your field that might offer better pay and leave?

Ultimately I suppose you have to consider whether carrying on where you are is going to have a detrimental effect on your MH. If it is then maybe this new role will be better for you.

recrudescence · 11/05/2019 21:53

Your current job is causing you “terrible stress and anxiety”. Focus on that and go for the new one.

bridgetreilly · 11/05/2019 21:55

New job. No question.

Divebar · 11/05/2019 22:03

Nothing would really bother me about the second job apart from the reduction in annual leave... 20 days seems awfully low. Surely that increases with service? The 3 extra hours a week is peanuts and don’t overlook 6 months sickpay...that’s a great benefit that no one thinks they’ll need until they actually do. Of course you don’t know for sure that the second job will offer a better working environment but you definitely know that your current job is not a good fit and is making you unwell. You think you should bite the bullet

SuziQ10 · 11/05/2019 22:13

Current job (six days extra hol and +3hrs a week) sounds better to me. Despite the pay rise.

But if you really, really dislike the current job then that changes everything. Sounds like you need a change, even if it's not ideal.

SuchAToDo · 11/05/2019 22:16

Go for the new job, if you stay at the old one you are only going to continue to feel the stress, anxiety and unhappiness....this new job is a chance to escape all that...and its natural to be nervous about starting somewhere new, but don't let that stop you, you might end up being really happy there and thriving..

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