Is it normal to feel like this when pregnant?

[WaterOffaDucksCrack]

I'm nearly 24 weeks. I feel huge. I was never that big with my first even right at the end. I was slim prior to becoming pregnant and now I just don't even want to leave the house as I feel like people are looking at ne thinking how big I am. Everyone at work comments. One person said I haven't put weight on at all anywhere else which made me think I have and she was trying to make me feel better!

I was slim pre pregnancy, had a small bump on my first, went back to myself fairly quickly.
I was huge on my second, I could barely walk with DS at the end, I went back to pre-pregnancy shape fairly quickly, he was born 3 weeks early, over 8lb, he was above 99.9 at his 6 week check up.
The easiest most painless birth ever, so it was a bonus.
People won't stare or care, they just pass comment without thinking.

It's more the people I know. Every day I walk into work I dread it. "You've put a lot of weight on your tummy! I know you're pregnant but it's a lot!" Or "ohh you look bigger every day" etc etc. I feel guilty because I should be enjoying the pregnancy (I lost 5 babies prior to my first). I just feel awful about myself. I barely eat because the thought of eating food and putting on unnecessary weight makes me feel sick

Emotionally I felt like shit. People talk about PND and quite right, too. However AND isn't really talked about. Well it wasn't when I was pregnant.
Physically I didn't give a hoot. I was showing at 3 months.
What you've got to remember. You're having a baby. You're not having a bloody mouse. 2 of my friends both very slim. One put 5 stone on.
The other only out the weight of the baby on. One baby was 7.11 the other was 7.10. So It just goes to show. Everyone's different.
Congratulations. and a for your upcoming arrival.

Also it might help to speak your MW.
You can't not be eating and certainly not in your condition.

You need to tell them that the comments are upsetting you. People seem to think they are free to comment on a person's size just because they're pregnant. Yet chances are most people wouldnt blatantly tell an overweight person that they're looking big today, or an underweight person they're looking skinny today. It's rude regardless of whether or not you're pregnant.

Oh don't feel like you should enjoy pregnancy, it's perfectly fine not to enjoy being pregnant. I have no doubt you fully appreciate being pregnant, but it doesn't mean you need to feel guilty for not enjoying it.

When I was only 5 months everyone kept saying you look ready to pop, aren't you due some time this month, you sure you're not having twins etc.

It was all really nice people who I don't normally consider to be rude at all. I think people just say weird/stupid things to pregnant women. It's a common affliction. And we have to listen to it so frequently when we're feeling emotional and trying to adjust to our changing body.

Omg people do this to me too. I am 27 weeks with my first. I was never slim pre pregnancy and always wore slightly baggier clothes. These tops still fit me in pregnancy so I think that’s why people keep saying to me how huge I am.

It annoys me op when people think it’s ok to comment on a bump size. As someone rightly pointed out if a non pregnant person had a large stomach we wouldn’t comment on that!.

Could just be the way the baby is lying. Mine changed dramatically around 35 weeks when she did a sudden flip.

It’s muscle memory. The first pregnancy - your body doesn’t know what to do as such so takes a while to become ‘big’. With subsequent pregnancies your body remembers that your stomach muscles etc need to stretch so you get far bigger more quickly as your body knows what to do.

I think you'd do them a favour to let them know it's bothering you, as well as yourself. Years ago I asked someone (who looked full term to me) how long she had left, and she said something like "3 months". I gawped at her belly and went "What?? Really?!!" and she just said "Well thanks" quite sarcastically and walked away. It hadn't even crossed my mind how it might make her feel, but her response really shamed me into realising. Now I don't comment at all on a pregnant woman's weight/bump/body. People are sometimes thoughtless without meaning to cause offense, but you're not overstepping to let them know it's rude. I was grateful in hindsight that she saved me from insulting loads more pregnant women going forward

Your colleagues obviously lack manners and professionalism, it's clearly upsetting you so I'd talk to your manager about it.

Thanks everyone. They used to comment on me being slim and now this! I have said I dont like it but I think everyone thinks I'm being silly!

"You've put a lot of weight on your tummy! I know you're pregnant but it's a lot!" Or "ohh you look bigger every day" etc etc.

So simply say “wow. That’s a nice thing to say to a pregnant person!” Without going in to it, make them aware the comments are not appreciated and they’ll back off.

Short comebacks like “yep, you already told me!” Or “gee thanks a lot” or even “thanks, good to know you’re comfortable enough with me to comment on my body!” and they’ll soon the message.

It’s not nice and you shouldn’t have to tolerate it

You'll be slim again, enjoy your pregnancy.
You're probably extra sensitive.

I barely eat because the thought of eating food and putting on unnecessary weight makes me feel sick
If it is causing you this distress, go to your GP. Have you had an eating disorder in the past.
It sounds like you're going to make yourself very sick, this baby is a long waited gift, please find the time to see a GP.

Hi OP, I feel you
I am 13 weeks with my second and I am huge, I look at least months pregnant. I haven’t had my 12 week scan yet (this week) so work don’t know, but it’s so obvious I’m sure they’ve figured it out

With my first, I barely showed until 4/5 months and didn’t look huge until the last few weeks. I am dreading how much I’m going to balloon during this pregnancy

I’ve heard about the muscle memory. I also had a miscarriage recently and apparently that contributes.

Should’ve said “*at least 5 months pregnant”

I had this all the time when I was pregnant with my DTs. People would say about how I must be due any day now and then would recoil in horror when I told them I was only 30 weeks (was full term size at 28 weeks) and had another 3 months to go. One particularly delightful woman in the supermarket said something really horrible about my size to her mate and laughed which made me cry.

Please speak to your midwife about maybe getting some counselling about fearing putting on unnecessary weight, and not eating. People might not think about commenting on your size, or mean it in a complimentary way, but it’s rude, maybe try talking to your manager and ask them to have a word?

I hope you enjoy the rest of your pregnancy 💐

I'm pregnant with my second and definitely put on weight sooner and more so. I'm slim too, so think it's more noticeable when you get a bump. My reply to similar comments is "I know. I can't believe it, you'd think I was growing a human or something" it seems to shut people up!

It's not 'normal' that it's making you not want to eat though, I think you should speak to your midwife about that Op. And try remember that it's only temporary and it means baby is growing and healthy. After my first my tummy pretty much all went straight after, the midwife pointed it out when I was in the bath and Dp was like "oh wow" (oh the joys of a audience while bathing)

I always show quickly and look bloody huge. People can be extraordinarily tactless about it. I had someone at work ask when I was due and then say “Jesus Christ, really?”, someone else look at me suspiciously while saying “you’re really big for only being six months, don’t you think you’re really really big for six months?”, and so on. It is infuriating.

You not eating and not leaving the house because of it is something to speak to your midwife or GP about though. That’s not good, you deserve some support with that.

Ahh I hate this! I don’t have long left but am having additional scans to monitor growth as I’m measuring really small, so I know I don’t look massive (and I’m still wearing a lot of my pre-pregnancy clothes with only six weeks to go). I’ve been worried about all the extra scans and stuff but people at work still say ‘OMG you look so pregnant today’ and ‘you’re actually waddling’ (this left me feeling livid as I am NOT but I was wearing blistery shoes).

I just hate it as I’d never comment on anyone’s physical appearance - except to compliment them on something I liked - yet suddenly if you’re pregnant it’s like the world is giving you a free pass to tell you that you look massive or you don’t look big enough or YOURE WADDLING. Can you imagine telling anyone outside of pregnancy that they’re waddling? Just shut up!

Please make sure you eat and be nice to yourself! Most people I’ve decided say it because they think they should acknowledge it but they don’t know how. I’ve literally taken to just looking at people when they comment on my size to hopefully make them feel a bit awkward. But if you can’t tell, I feel you. It’s infuriating.

I remember being 37/38ish weeks pregnant and going to a supermarket and thinking everyone was looking at me and feeling like a freak. It’s not nice at the time and if it’s upsetting you try and speak to someone. But remember it’s only for a short time.

At the end of my first pregnancy, I had a tiny football- sized bump. She was born at 37 weeks weighing 6lb. During my second pregnancy 18 months later, I was huge and I had to have a test for Gestational Diabetes as the baby had a big abdominal circumference and I was told he would be about 9lb. Born at 40 weeks weighing 6lb 15oz. 2 weeks later he WAS 9lb ( breast fed). Now aged 11 and a half, he is taller and double the weight of his older sister. They have the same parents but obviously a very different metabolism and genetic make up.