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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DP momentarily forgot where we lived

63 replies

Stripyseagulls · 11/05/2019 10:18

DP had a bit of a weird episode. He was walking along our street and found himself outside a door that wasn’t ours & momentarily didn’t know where he was. It’s freaked him out (and me).

I have had similar where I literally forgot where my car was and put it down to perimenopause.

DP is older than me so nearly 60 - aibu to be worried or could it just be a ‘senile moment’?

OP posts:
Original poster
Stripyseagulls · 11/05/2019 10:19

He also looked REALLY freaked out when he came home

OP posts:
RhiWrites · 11/05/2019 10:20

Hard to say based on one incident. Get him to see the GP?

JustLikeAPill · 11/05/2019 10:21

Tbh that sounds worrying and although it could be something that sounds like an amusing anecdote I’d push him to get it checked out.

FuckingHadEnough · 11/05/2019 10:21

YANBU I would book him a GP appointment ASAP and get him checked. Just for peace of mind. If it is something then the earlier it is diagnosed the more effective the treatments are. Flowers I hope he was just having a deep thought moment and your minds are quickly put at ease.

Beebumble2 · 11/05/2019 10:22

If this is a single incident I wouldn’t worry at all. We all have ‘absent’ moments from time to time. Maybe his subconscious brain was thinking about something else.
If these episodes are becoming frequent, then a visit to the GP.

BrieAndChilli · 11/05/2019 10:22

Hard to tell.
A couple of times I’ve driven to work on a day I don’t have the kids to take to school eg holidays and I’ve suddenly found myself at the school with no real recollection of the drive there!!

RandomMess · 11/05/2019 10:27

Although it may be nothing it could be the first sign of dementia and the earlier you get diagnosis the better so I would go speak to the GP. It is a different thing to driving a frequent route when you didn't need to like school in the holidays.

OKBobble · 11/05/2019 10:31

Could be indication of a TIA . My husband didn't know who I was or where he was for a very brief period. Test showed he had had a TIA (ministroke).

Gigglinghysterically · 11/05/2019 10:35

A family member did a similar thing in a familiar place and another time fainted and had no idea where they were and how they got there.

It could be a number of things. I would definitely go to GP. An ultrasound of the heart and a scan to see if he had a TIA could be in order.

Original poster
Stripyseagulls · 11/05/2019 10:36

He’s totally fine now but will get him to go to the GP next week

OP posts:
LagunaBubbles · 11/05/2019 10:40

Sounds worrying, as people said it could be something like a TUA or might be totally innocent. Does he have epilepsy? It could be an absence seizure. But yes GP is first port of call.

TheInebriati · 11/05/2019 10:40

He could have had an episode of 'jamais vu', or 'never seen'. Its the opposite of deja vu and its very unsettling when it happens.

Original poster
Stripyseagulls · 11/05/2019 10:41

He hasn’t got epilepsy or anything. He’s pretty healthy tbh bar being on statins & hbp tablets so everything is monitored.

OP posts:
HeronLanyon · 11/05/2019 10:44

Could have been anxiety/panic attack. Could have been odd migraine. Years ago I had a few migraines without any vision disturbance but which made me feel very not in touch with reality. Remember once at train station on way to court (lawyer) totally unsure how to get there ! For me was linked to stress.
Good luck op and to your dp.

Aridane · 11/05/2019 10:44

Forgetting where you’ve parked thy at or driving on autopilot, fairly unremarkable.

Forgetting where you live, less so

DC3dilemma · 11/05/2019 10:46

Statins and hbp tablets means he’s got high cholesterol and hypertension, which are both risk factors for vascular dementia and strokes. With this background, there is a reasonable likelihood this was TIA related. He needs to see his GP.

MereDintofPandiculation · 11/05/2019 10:46

Although it may be nothing it could be the first sign of dementia and the earlier you get diagnosis the better Why is it better to get the diagnosis earlier? Is there anything useful you can do with diagnosis or are you not just draining all happiness out of your remaining life?

MitziK · 11/05/2019 10:47

I'd still say A&E in case it was a TIA - they don't only happen once if ignored, as FIL found out when his 'not quite right' moments over 18 months culminated in a stroke and disablement at 65 last summer.

The fact he's being treated for high blood pressure and statins makes him a higher risk, as he's already got conditions that cause the bastard things.

He wouldn't be wasting anybody's time, even if it turns out to be nothing serious.

LakieLady · 11/05/2019 10:47

I did that when I was 21 but, in fairness, I had only just moved. I ran for a bus and was delighted to catch it, sat down and realised 10 minutes later that I didn't live on that bus route any more.

I've also had a thing when driving that is sort of like the opposite of deja vu. It's when I'm driving along a road I know I've been down loads of times before, but it suddenly looks completely unfamiliar and I'm very unsure as to where I actually am. I just keep driving until I recognise where I am, and so far haven't got to a junction or anything where I don't know which way to go.

This first happened when I was in my late 20s, and tends to happen when I'm stressed or anxious about something. It happens very rarely now (I'm 63).

If your DH is someone who's given to being a bit daydreamy or preoccupied with things other than what he's doing, I wouldn't worry too much. But if he's showing other signs such as absent mindedness, unusual irritiability, issues with spatial awareness I'd get him to the doctor.

RiftGibbon · 11/05/2019 10:48

A friend of mine had an 'episode' the other day. She drove to the hairdressers with the DCs as it was raining. They came out, walked home, put the dinner on and got stuck into homework. She was then due to go out somewhere, opened the front door and discovered her car had been stolen. She was just picking up the phone to report it when one of the DC's asked her if she was going back for the car.

MitziK · 11/05/2019 10:49

Just to add, when I worked at the local hospital, my consultant took himself off to A&E purely because he 'had a funny turn'. They didn't think he wasted his time, either - it's how some strokes and TIAs are described by thousands of patients, as they aren't all drooping face and paralysis.

Original poster
Stripyseagulls · 11/05/2019 10:50

Not sure I should have posted as now totally freaked out 😱 His cholesterol is only 5 now and blood pressure much better but might send him to out of hours

OP posts:
LakieLady · 11/05/2019 10:50

@TheInebriati

"Jamais vu" - thanks so much for that. I feel mildly relieved now that I know it's a thing. Every time I've mentioned it to anyone, they've looked at me as though I'm crazy.

{shuffles off to get googling}

InsertFunnyUsername · 11/05/2019 10:53

It does sound worrying, no harm in seeing the GP.

Saying that, i have done this a few times (mid 20s)especially after a night shift, my neighbours woke to me trying to get in their house Blush

Ive also sat at the station, Watched my train arrive and leave, stayed sitting on the bench for a good 5 minutes before i realised. Has he been sleeping well?

Outanabout · 11/05/2019 10:55

My sister woke one morning and couldn't remember what year it was, what year she'd married, had her son, nothing. After a battery of tests proved negative, turned out she had appendicitis, doctors reckoned it was confusion caused by low level infection.