What would your response to dh be?

[Oohgossip]

If you told him you didn’t get any ‘me time’ without children (as he does) and his response was ‘what about when they’re asleep?’

A swift kick to the bollocks would be my response.

Ha ha ha

Fuck. Off.

Does he mean at night? Or do they nap in the day?

I wouldn't respond immediately. I'd need time to formulate a suitable response because I'd be incensed he could say something like that.

Offer to swap - he has your me time and you have his. Since you get enough, should be fine with him!

I got told I should be using my 9pm onwards 'me time' to clean today.....

Incandescent rage.

What was your response?

I like the suggestion of swapping as he feels it's good enough!

No advice. But my XP told me he couldn't have ds 1 night a month because "when would he go out?"

My was simply "one of the other 29 days of the month".

He still didn't get it. It's only 1 of the reasons he's an ex!

I don't know.

If he means that the odd hour or whatever nap time is your "me time", then that's a bit much.

If you have kids that are asleep by 7pm and stay asleep all night, then I'd say that evenings are pretty good "me time", and you could use it for hobbies, nights out (with him staying at home obvs), relaxation etc.

Generally, once the waking in the night stage is over, if there is one out of the home worker and one SAHP, then you are both busy all day, but both free from 7pm or so, with time out of the house to be shared/negotiated.

I wouldn’t respond to him I would book myself a girly day then tell him he was on daddy duty and you will be going out at least once a month whilst he cares for his child.

My husband wouldn't say that because he values his life.

Well, it depends what he means.

Does he mean at night when they're in bed? Because that's pretty normal for most parents during the week, I think.

But if he means while they nap during the day, I'd tell him to fuck off!

I second a PP who says their DH values being alive too much to say something that offensive..........

What an ignorant thing to say. By the time mine were asleep I felt like I'd been through the washing machine on a fast spin most days, and I didn't have the energy to even think of what I could do, let alone do it.

Well, do they sleep or not? DS was the best baby ever, he'd nap for 3h every afternoon, like clockwork. Plenty of me time.

So you could go to the gym, or to the pub or shops while they slept? No? Not really the same then is it?

I liked DD's nap times but actual me time without children is different.

Not that mine slept at night either.

I wouldn't stay married to a bloke who had that opinion

When men say they are "babysitting" their own kids...........Grrrrrr
Tell him you are not babysitting his kids while he has his me time unless its reciprocated

I'd ask him if he felt that would be enough for him.

'You're right. So you watch them whilst they sleep. I'm away out clubbing! I'll try not to wake you when I come back in the early hours of the morning.'

But in RL, I would sign up for something I wanted to do (eg class, gym, hobby) and tell him that was my time and he had to watch the DCs.

I’d tell him he was a cunt and to speak to me again when he comes up with a suitable response to my question. Then I’d go to bed, set my alarm early and go out for the day, leaving a note on the kitchen bunker telling to fuck off and then fuck off again.

Sounds like time to book a weekend away and tell him when he’s on duty.

Even when your kids are asleep someone still needs to be watching over them you cant just go out

He meant naps in the day