To slam doors back

[mylittlenugget]

I am. I know it's petty and it's probably annoying my next door neighbour but I've had enough.
I live in a first floor flat with us being on top. I have a neighbour next to me and a neighbour below. Never hear anything from next door but downstairs it's constant. Children screaming, the grandmother and parents screaming, doors slamming, dogs barking and getting out. It's been going on for months and yesterday I had enough. I can't even go and talk to them because of the type of people they are.
It started with it sounding like they were banging on the ceiling (we were silent in the flat as I was on Mumsnet my phone and my partner was on his) so I stomped around the flat for a few seconds. Then about ten minutes later they started slamming doors, so I slammed a door. Then half an hour later there was shouting and slamming again so I slammed the doors again. It was so petty and I wouldn't normally do this but I figured they might not know how much we can hear, and as I said we can't tell them so I showed them. I was having a bad day but it's no excuse.
I just can't stand it anymore. From the minute I wake up at 6:30am until I go to bed, sometimes not until 2am all I can hear is them. The children and the parents of the children don't even live there and I understand they're visiting grandma but Jesus Christ why can't she go to them ever.
I've had enough. I've seriously considered reporting them but they're type of people to cause more issues if I do this.
I just needed a rant and to get this off my chest. But I'm so fed up

I live in a flat and have lived both under and over neighbours.

I feel your pain.

We are ground floor and upstairs are arseholes. They're being evicted because they're so antisocial and have damaged the flat and caused huge issues for the owner.

My OH tells me not to bang back etc. But I'm planning on sticking a condom on their car exhaust, or something, when I take the dog for a midnight wee.

I feel bad for next door because if my flats shaking from the noise below then surely their flat is affected too, and it doesn't help with me retaliating. It just gets to be too much. And I tried so hard to be a considerate neighbour when I first moved in, I asked if smoking near their home bothered them, and I never close the doors (apart from the front and back) because I realised so quickly how much noise it might make. I've started watching tv with subtitles because I worried that maybe the soundproofing was just awful and that we were annoying them as much as they annoyed us. But it feels like they're actually just antisocial wankers.
If they drove I'd stick a condom on their exhaust, but I'm not sure the taxi driver who picks her up every day deserves it😂
I'm not planning on making it a habit of being so petty but it felt really therapeutic to just slam the doors and not worry about how heavy I was walking or shouting during an argument yesterday.

They probably haven’t noticed your door-slamming. They clearly live life at full volume and may struggle to understand your need for peace and quiet. I have no suggestions.

Sounds very difficult to deal with. Can you move?

Trying to move as although it's the perfect flat (minus downstairs) it's too expensive, especially with a baby on the way (another reason I've tried keeping it down as I understand soon we might be the problem neighbours with a screaming baby) but the council haven't replied to my housing application and I can't get hold of them and I'm not going to find anywhere cheaper that's as good on private rent.
I'll just have to keep looking and put up with it in the meantime but it's so frustrating (maybe hormones are making me angrier but i don't understand how they're so rude)