Help - teen son and porn

[helpmumof3]

Posted here for traffic, sorry

Just doing a spot check on my sons phone, he's only in year 7 so every now and again I check his phone and search history.

He's been searching for lots of porn videos, but we obviously have strict internet controls at home, but he's watched them when staying at his grandparents house and cousins houses as I hadn't thought to check what controls they had in place (I know really stupid, please don't criticise me)

I'm really upset but can't think straight, feeling emotional, i don't want him watching horrible things, I want to him be 11 and I know he's going to be curious but I want him to have a childhood and not be exposed to such adult content any this age

Now we don't know what to do, if I admit I know how to search his history he will probably figure out how to delete or get around it. I've told my OH he needs to have a chat with him but my OH is not great at being the strict parent.

Other mums please help with advice, how to tackle and is there any apps to monitor the phone usage that we should be using going forward?

My kid would lose the phone. No question.

I would do a lot to stop my pre teen becoming addicted to porn.

Yes, some of you obviously haven't seen the stuff that our teenage sons are looking at, it really isn't like the wank mags that we found in the woods when we were kids.

When I've talked to my son about it, I have come from the angle that porn is not like real life sex, looking at the horrible stuff he has been before he has experienced sex is not setting him up for healthy sexual relationships, it is demeaning to women and is in a lot of cases exploitative. He listens and agrees and apologises, but can't seem to help himself, so we've put on filtering (which, yes, he could get round if he googled a bit) and I monitor what he accesses on his phone. It is horrible.